Sudden change in my son's behaviour

[KG]

This week alone we've had some rude comments made, by him. Totally not him at all. And I just got an e-mail from one of his teachers that he was acting disrespectful towards another student, and towards that teacher.

 

I intend to sit down and discuss this, but I think it may, may, have something to do with the 3rd anniversary of him losing his Mom. But he will deny it to the end.

 

He has been praised by others for his polite, gentle nature, and now this?

 

Ideas welcome,

TIA,

KG

[doityourself]

You seem to know what you need to do, make sure its nothing like being bullied at school or anything of that nature.

 

Is he in counseling, if he cant open up to you maybe a middle man would do some good. Does he have a woman figure around?

[preciousgirl82]

I have a feeling it does have to do with the loss of his mom. Thats not something that is easy to get over and your son probably doesnt know how to express his emotions. Heck, we as adults still struggle with it sometimes. You need to sit down and speak to him if you dont feel counseling is an option at this time. Force him to talk about his feelings because, if he doesnt, keeping it bottled in will only lead to emotional distress, misconduct and extreme depression later on. If this is unusual behavior for him then u can bet there's something going on thats troubling him.

[Seraphim]

I would bet that it does have to do with his mom KG. My son acts up when it comes to the time of year his brother died. I have encouraged him to tell his teacher WHY he is upset. He does. He basically says " I am depressed this time of year because my brother died." and then they understand why he is stubborn and moody.

[KG]

Just got an e-mail from another teacher...work not done, talking back to the teacher.

 

Counselling being arranged.

[unknownme]

Something is deffinatelly up..

 

Yes counseling is great, Maybe he will open up with a counselor, Make sure you get feed back.. being supportive is what children need

[FarthestEdge]

ah how old is he? early teens, right?

 

I hate to say this, but it could be nothing more than classic teenage crapattituditis....

 

He might just be trying on a new personae for size. Asserting himself, being a bigshot in front of his friends, or rejecting sympathy or gentle treatment. Is it possible he's feeling like the 'kid who's mom died" and wants to break away from that label? ...

 

He might also be trying to impress a hot chick who likes the bad boys, or new friends...anything going on there?

 

I don't know. Of course you want to look into the missing mom angle (I mean NO disrespect, nor do I mean to minimize this in ANY WAY), but it could also just be part of the normal teenage condition...which if it is, then you can pat yourself on the back, you've raised a perfectly normal teenage boy...attitude and all!

[KG]

I'm going to sit down at dinner tonight and have a discussion with him about this. I can't get to the bottom of it alone.

[Seraphim]

It could be this too, I had quite the "tude" as a teenager.

[doityourself]

KG- wow teens huh, the only experience I have with teens is with girls and they are always drama queens?

 

Hope your talk went good.

[KG]

I assigned a point system based on bad grades/behaviour. Losing big priveleges if he gets out of control.

 

He brought home 2 A's and a B this week......

[doityourself]

How does your point system work, Im always looking for new ideas on how to punish my sons. Does it also have rewards on good behavior?

 

The only thing I can do that they care about it take the xbox away, which I had to do last night (I took it for a month, kinda regretting the time limit I set) over arguing. My sons are 10 and 5.

[KG]

How does your point system work, Im always looking for new ideas on how to punish my sons. Does it also have rewards on good behavior?

 

The only thing I can do that they care about it take the xbox away, which I had to do last night (I took it for a month, kinda regretting the time limit I set) over arguing. My sons are 10 and 5.

 

1 assignment late, or bad grade, no computer for weekend.

 

2 late.....no 'puter or tv.

 

3.....all of the above and no xBox.

 

4....all the above, and no school dances that month.:sad: