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Why does silence hurt???


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I see this a lot on here.And have experienced it myself.Many would rather hear those piercing words than to endure the deafening silence of someone who has left.Why is this?? Why does it hurt to hear nothing?Many would think nothing can't hurt you..but then why does it???

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Because a reply feels like some form of caring despite the insensitive and maybe irrational response which they lay upon the fact they have dumped you long before, while no reply feels like they don't care and have forgotten you all together and are enjoying having sex with the new person in their life to remember you.

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yea the silence is worse in my opinion. when i saw my ex last sunday she actually wanted to talk and it made me feel a tiny bit better. which is also very odd considering she didnt want to talk a week before but yet i become suspicious of her intentions..

 

silence is so much worse cuz its more a feeling of less caring and the void thats there. and it is alot like death..someone dies ya cant talk to them anymore. yet the ex is still alive but not to you anymore.

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That and a reply is some sort of closure, or explanation.

Sometimes, those cutting, nasty words help us distance ourselves from the person who has left, and we can hold onto something that they've said and use it to help push ourselves away.

When there's nothing, we grasp for something - because we have nothing to hold onto - there's just a gap where there was something before.

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the fact my ex never said he was goin nc or anything and i reached out very lovin and maturely, owning up to my mistakes ect...and then him jus blanking me...says alot...all his "i love you sooooooooooo much you will never realise" etc well it all rings hollow now...to me, his words mean nowt/nadda....

 

he has dumped me without havin the balls to say so, (jus like last ex) so...i took my power back and ended it and i bet my bottom dollar he will play the martyr and say i left him

 

jog on....youre not woth it or me

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I see this a lot on here.And have experienced it myself.Many would rather hear those piercing words than to endure the deafening silence of someone who has left.Why is this?? Why does it hurt to hear nothing?Many would think nothing can't hurt you..but then why does it???

Mizz, because silence is the greatest sign of indifference from a dumper.

 

I can so much relate to this thread - i have experienced this "method" of dumping from the last 2 men in my life. It is much more hurtful than the "crumbs" people speak of (I don't see them as crumbs, but as a sign they are thinking of you - if people want to view them as crumbs, that's up to them).

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Because a reply feels like some form of caring despite the insensitive and maybe irrational response which they lay upon the fact they have dumped you long before, while no reply feels like they don't care and have forgotten you all together and are enjoying having sex with the new person in their life to remember you.

 

You nailed it - I agree. And the fact is, when they stop all contact with you, all those things are probably true.

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I'd much rather have had an "sorry, we tried but it didn't work. We had a great time and you'll always be special" than an outright wall of silence. I'm sure they care, but sometimes after so long it would have been nice (easier) to know that it meant something ( even though im sure it did)

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