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Girlfriend's best friend is in jail


rosstheboss

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Hi

My girlfriend has been good friends with this guy for most of her life. I've only met him once and he had a bit of a reputation around these parts. I immediately sensed something I didn't like about him and some of the things my girlfriend told me about him seemed to confirm the point that he wasn't a nice guy. She kept telling me that he's a really good guy but he just grew up on the wrong side of the tracks as it were. My cousin also dated him for a few months.

Anyway, last year around July he was arrested and kept in custody, it was rumored he was in for either rape or sex with an underaged girl or both. My girlfriend was obviously quite upset about this. She had written to him a few times and talked once on the phone where he promised he had done nothing wrong. So me not wanting to side with the rumors tried to comfort my girlfriend through this.

However, today, his case has appeared in the news and to cut the long story short; he admitted to having sex with 4 underaged girls right from the beginning.

 

I am almost livid with anger right now at him for a) doing what he did, and b) lying to and upsetting my girlfriend in a way that almost goes beyond comprehension.

 

I really feel that I need to let my anger be known to my girlfriend but that will be the very last thing she needs to hear right now. I don't think I can comfort her without getting angry about it.

What can I do?

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My heart goes out to you. If you badmouth the friend, her first impulse will be to defend him--and then she'll believe her own defense. Not good tactics; will likely just cause a rift between you and GF.

 

I'd not say a word other than, "I understand" to GF if she wants to talk about it. If she doesn't, then things could be sinking in as deeply as you could hope.

 

The up side is, he's in jail, not at your place.

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