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I could never find one such as you...SuperDave71

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Thank you so much for bumping this. It has helped me so much this morning. In my case, I broke it off because he seemed absent. He never was happy enough with himself to truly give to someone else...and I do know he loved me. He was the one who started to make moves to come back to me - then poof, disappeared into thin air. I thought it was something I did; now, I think it's because he's back with his ex and trying to make things work with her (I know it's awful to say, but i saw pics of him and he looks miserable, awful, has let himself go...I hardly recognize him. He's clearly not happy. In some ways, this says it all to me).


The point is, and you make it so well - WE are the ones that we want. WE are the only ones who can fill the "dark night of the soul," make ourselves happy and love ourselves enough. Nobody else can do that. I had remembered this before he broke NC and started talking to me again in March. I was in a good place, but not there yet. I'll have to work to get back there now. I'll do it, in spite of my father being super sick and other things going wrong in my life. This is the time I'll have to stand up for myself and have my back - and stop looking at her Facebook page, with pics of her looking so blissfully in love (yes, I am guessing it's with him).


This is not about me not being good enough; it's about him not loving himself enough to truly commit to one person. And me not loving myself enough to know the difference. Thank you, Dave. I will bump this from time to time so others can read your wisdom and not feel so alone.


Hugs, everyone.

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  • 3 years later...

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