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Hey guys, I need your help, please


TraneX007
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Sorry, I know this is gonna be long but I want to hear some of your guys opinions and this is the most important thing in my life right now so Id really appreciate it if you read it and responded.

 

I'm 16 and a Junior in HS, and I first met this girl who I liked who is a sophomore, about 4 months ago. She knew I liked her, and we started talking and hanging out. I became friends with all of her friends, but me and Christina were still only friends, no hooking up, or anything like that. Time went by, and I found out through mutual friends that she would hook up with me, although we never ever talked about it to each other, and she didnt know that I knew she wanted to. I of course was very happy, and had a few chances, but it never really happened, maybe because we are both inexperienced and never made a move. Time continued moving on, and finally things started getting weird. We were losing the chemistry that we once had, even though I still liked her. It would sometimes be a struggle to plan things to do at night, and it would often result in tension in a sense. we started talking a bit less. One night we decided to take our conversation to a deeper level online, but not bcause things were going well, its bcause they were declining and we had to say where we were, and this is the first time we talked about anything involving this. She says that she feels a loss of chemistry, and for now wants to be friends because even though she thinks im great and attractive, she doesnt like love me right now and she cant control how she feels. she said she thought that there might of something good between us back a bit, but now shes not sure. i tottally blew it i had my chance and never made a move. she said she wanted to stay as friends because she didnt want things to get weird because she likes hanging out wth me and doesnt really want to enter that right now, but isnt sure about the future. A few days later, i emailed her saying give me another chance, but if u dont want to then this is it, i can move on. she basically said the same things, saying how can i give us another chance if we dont have chemistry and we dont even talk that much anymore. i accpeted it, not knowing what to do. Alot of time has gone by, weeks, maybe months, and it seems to her as if i have moved on. We talk occasionally, although she knows that i ignore her because it is very hard for me to be friends with her if i want to move on. I dont think she likes it, but she accepts it and lives her life as well. Well a week ago, we broke the streak of not talking and had a really really good conversation online. Things felt so new again since we hadnt talked in so long, and i really missed her, we had so much to talk about, and my strong feelings came right back up. she was so nice and cute, and the thing is she never turned me down she said she just wasnt sure at the time.We havent talked for the past week though, and she thinks i dont like her anymore and things are weird and i've kinda lost friendship with her friends in a way, and with her, and that stage of my life is kinda moving on, even though we occasionally talk, and say hi if we see each other.

 

So this is where I am exactly now. I want to move on. However, I see no real reason to. I REALLY like this girl, and can totally see myself with her. If you were me and had your mind set on getting with her again, what exactly would you do? Would you think of something clever? Would you start being friends with her again and do things differently? What should I do??? PLEASE HELP with detail, you have no idea what it'll mean to me.

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I don't know how much of a help I'll be, but I can tell you what I think I'd do. First of all, find out why you don't really want to leave her. If it's just because she's pretty, then I would try to leave her. If you really really like her because she is who she is, then I'd try to go back out with her. You get out of a relationship what you put into it. If you don't try to make it work, then it probably won't. Of course there is always the exception. I'm still trying to figure out if you can love somebody and them not love you back, even though I never really thought you could. Okay, so, if you like her as much as you say you do, you should probably try. Just try really hard to make it interesting. Try to make it fun. Hey, maybe if you wait a little bit she'll come to you. But anyway, I would just keep trying. If you can't find anything, and you keep having to struggle and work, then it probably won't work. I hope I've been of some assistance. Good luck.

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She may like you for some things and thats why she liked you at first, but she wanted something else or expected something else, and thats why she didnt feel the "chemestry" .

 

Dont push the issue with her just do whatevr you do, be yourself. its hard to know what girls like/expect, sometimes i think they expect you to read their minds. so we are faced with the dilemma, if we come on to strong that may spook them and may think your a jerk, on the other hand if your slow going and take it a little at a time they may think you lack self confidence, boring, or just not interested in them.

 

Its a tough call. im sending you a PM with a link, some info that might help.

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wow, great site. i have just realized that the key REALLY lies in a mans confidence. Thats what it comes down to. I messed up so bad I showed so many signs of hesitating and i screwed myself over. I've decided Im gonna be a man and forget about her, start clean, act confident and attract a new girl. I'm strong enough to let go, realize my mistakes, and start over.

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