jrgoodie Posted May 29, 2002 Posted May 29, 2002 Me and my girlfriend of about 1 1/2 years just broke up two weeks ago. We were very serious and were living together and talking about marriage. Granted we had our fights but I believe the good outweighed the bad. Then she decided she needed some space about a month ago. So I respected her decision and moved out that week. But she continued to call me two and three times a day. About two weeks after I moved we got back together but still mutually chose not to live together until we were married. Then after a week of being back together we got in one argument and she broke up with me again she didn't call for a few days and then started the calling again and it's been everyday. I actually went to lunch with her today which now I realize it was a mistake because now I'm right back in the grieving process where I started. But I got my hopes up thinking she would want me back. When I say something to the effect of getting back together she says not right now. She still says she loves me and misses me. And I definitely still love her but what do I do because she still continues to call. And what is she trying to do by calling all the time and inviting me to lunch? Does she just want to be friends? What gives? I'm confused
kamurj Posted June 1, 2002 Posted June 1, 2002 She is the only one who can answer those questions. I think that you should ask her those questions and demand a straight answer. If she "needs space", then find out _why_ she needs space. Did she feel smothered? Was there something she wanted from the relationship that she wasn't getting? If you don't find out exactly what is going on then how do you know she isn't going to flake out on you again? I would rather be solid friends than to be stuck in limbo waiting for something that may never happen.
kamurj Posted June 2, 2002 Posted June 2, 2002 I can definitely relate to your situation. To be as brief as possible, you need to cut off all communication with her right now. No phone calls, no visits, no email contact, etc. And I'm not talking for 2 days either. You need to follow this method for at least a couple months in order to really draw a conclusion. This is the ONLY way that she will determine just how much she wants to be with you, and just how much you really want to be with her. Neither one of you will be able to think clearly if you are constantly breaking up, making up, and then breaking up again. No communcation for a couple months, then check in with each other. You'll know where to go from there. I'd get more detailed, but have to run. Hope this helps!
kamurj Posted June 5, 2002 Posted June 5, 2002 I agree with the person above me. Let them go for a season, (You Never Lost What You Never Had!!).
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