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How to decipher between genuine flirting signs and fake ones?


robinhood

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Just a little explanation of why I'm so cynical about body language. I knew of a girl who liked me in the past from her friends, so I put on some body language to see what would happen i.e. prolonging eye contact, hugging her from time to time and smiling. That was unethical, I know, but it did no harm in the end. Now I've repeated this on a few girls that have liked me and they all buy it.

 

So what stops a girl from pretending they are interested in you when they are not? Men only have body language to work with when figuring out whether a girl likes them or not, whereas girls are approached the majority of times. Smiling, turning feet towards you, touching your arm, hugging you, and prolonged eye contact can all be consciously controlled. Help !

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Yeah pretty much nothing stops them if they want to. Just like how men are supposed to do all the asking, this is just another one of those unfair things. In the end guys and girls can fake everything. You just don't know till you start seeing the signs like she rejects you straight away, or doesn't seem interested if she goes out with you, etc.

 

If it's out of having fun with her friends you just have to employ the "don't give a crap about anyone else" approach unfortunately and just a bad reflection on them.

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You really don't know if someone is lying to you right off the bat. Only when you get to know them better. There are many people who lie their way through the relationship..even lie their way in marriages, doing a good acting job of being attentive etc when their heart actually feels unmoved. That is why it is a good idea to not only judge by actions..you need to really get a gut feeling as well..observe carefully...look beyond and beneath the stereotyped flirtatious moves.

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Absolutely! People can lie and lie again if they're good at it, they can fake body language, everything. To really work them out, it's often better to look at how they treat people other than you.

 

If a girl who's flirting with you is respectful and courteous to other guys, but isn't flirting with them, that's a good sign. If she's clearly doing the same with other guys as she is with you that's a warning light. If she makes fun of other guys in front of you, that's a mega warning light.

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Soprano, it's a bad sign.

 

Unless the guy is really behaving offensively (e.g. indecently exposing himself) - then of course she can mention it.

 

But otherwise, "creepy" is a VERY offensive and hurtful term, and she should not use it without very good reason. By doing so she is taking advantage of his feelings to broadcast "look at me! I'm so attractive I'm beating guys off with a stick", and so trying to play you off against him. That kind of person is not trustworthy, they will say exactly the same about you if it suits them.

 

After all, she (presumably) wouldn't like you telling all your friends she's a sl**, especially if it wasn't true, so why is she doing the same to other people?

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Soprano, it's a bad sign.

 

Unless the guy is really behaving offensively (e.g. indecently exposing himself) - then of course she can mention it.

 

But otherwise, "creepy" is a VERY offensive and hurtful term, and she should not use it without very good reason. By doing so she is taking advantage of his feelings to broadcast "look at me! I'm so attractive I'm beating guys off with a stick", and so trying to play you off against him. That kind of person is not trustworthy, they will say exactly the same about you if it suits them.

 

After all, she (presumably) wouldn't like you telling all your friends she's a sl**, especially if it wasn't true, so why is she doing the same to other people?

 

Personality wise it may not be a good trait, but I'm not interested in this girl for her personality

 

I'm asking if it's a good sign towards her liking me, or showing any interest.

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Well, what do you want from this girl?

 

My view is that if someone isn't nice, it is a serious mistake to think you can either change them or outsmart them. You are best to steer clear.

 

I'm not 100% saying that this girl isn't nice, I'm just saying that the behaviour you describe is a strong warning sign.

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When a girl talks about how creepy another guy is (a guy that is trying to pursue her) in front of you, is that a good or bad sign? Or just neutral.

 

Either she actually has a guy creeping on her (neutral). Or she is just telling you a story to convey how attractive she is (good thing).

The latter means she wants you, try to remember where her eyes went on telling that. Then ask her three questions and tell her to lie on one and tell the truth on the other two. If you fail to see the eye movements/ she keeps steady eye contact, just ask details from each one and calibrate on the responses. Follow up by asking detailed questions from the guy creeping on her.

If you find out she is lying, you know she wants to qualify to you.

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Well, what do you want from this girl?

 

My view is that if someone isn't nice, it is a serious mistake to think you can either change them or outsmart them. You are best to steer clear.

 

I'm not 100% saying that this girl isn't nice, I'm just saying that the behaviour you describe is a strong warning sign.

 

I don't want her as a girlfriend.

Let's put it that way

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Either she actually has a guy creeping on her (neutral). Or she is just telling you a story to convey how attractive she is (good thing).

The latter means she wants you, try to remember where her eyes went on telling that. Then ask her three questions and tell her to lie on one and tell the truth on the other two. If you fail to see the eye movements/ she keeps steady eye contact, just ask details from each one and calibrate on the responses. Follow up by asking detailed questions from the guy creeping on her.

If you find out she is lying, you know she wants to qualify to you.

 

Good advice.

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5 Signs of A Strong Friendship – ...
5 Signs of A Strong Friendship – Spotting A True Friend

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