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schools gettin me down


ilikeschool
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I suppose I will begin by offering a bit of background information.

My name is Tim, I'm 16, a sophomore in high school.

 

Alrighty, so for a start, about a year ago, my brother committed suicide.

This probably adds to the stress that has been getting me down lately.

 

I'm what is considered a good student. I take a.p. and honors classes. I do my homework, am almost always at school, and I stay after for 2 different clubs. I play guitar in a band, and I have a girlfriend. pretty typical high school stuff i guess.

 

now, the main problem i have is that i find myself considering suicide too often. however, i know im probably too scared to do it, but it worries me that i spend so much time thinking about it; i dont want to "blow up" one day.

 

i wake up at around 6 everyday so i can get to school (barely) on time. i spend the whole day listening to a bunch of stupid kids and teachers talk about doing drugs and having sex. high school, yeah.... i get home at 3:30, when i eat some more lunch, and start homework. i can EASILY spend six hours of it every night, and i typically find myself struggling to finish it by midnight. so, what? i have a few hours a day i get to spend away from school stuff. how do they expect that to work?!

 

this is all sounding pretty whiny, and i suppose it may be, but the fact of the matter is, its getting me down, and, more than anything else, i feel the need to get these problems off my chest.

 

this week ive found myself feeling like ive been shot. figuratively, of course, its like im struggling to get up, and any time i make progress, someone comes and shoves me back down.

 

i dont really know, writing all this makes me realize how good my life really is, but i really feel bad sometimes. its spending my whole day at school or doing homework that makes me feel bad i guess. i dont have time to even write this, i SHOULD be doing homework.

 

its not even depression that makes me feel suicidal, its the stress of school and homework, which sounds kind of lame, but its true. i dont understand how anybody can spend all their time just doing schoolwork.

 

I wish i could have made this post better, i forget the things i had planned on saying.. whatever, i already dont feel as bad. to be honest, i sort of forget what was making me feel so bad.

anyway...

 

 

-tim

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Yup. School sucks. I'm 17 and a senior in high school. I'm glad i'm almost done. I used to deal with it fine. I listened to my ipod all the time during school and that's how I dealt with it, but some geniuses on the school board decided that it'd be a good idea to ban electronic devices from 8-3, that includes breaks and lunch. I've been miserable this whole year so far. Do they have a rule against that at your school? Anyway, I suggest doing that, or hanging out with your girlfriend a lot at school. Maybe don't take so many ap classes next year, or drop some. Why do you take so many?

If you free up your after school, you can spend time doing important things. I think maybe you might be putting school as too high a priority. You have a girl friend. You should feel lucky, I guess. Maybe you should stop worrying about school so much. That's my advice anyway...

-Matt

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music definitely helped me through, and also following my passions. I took a number of AP classes as well, but i never really focused too much on them (i was a B student), I focused way too much on other things. I tried starting up an online business in my sophomore year, which definitely distracted me.

But sometimes you just have to step back from all the daily stress and problems you are facing and just take in life. Step back one of these nights and just relax for the sake of having some time to yourself and allowing yourself to recuperate. Yes it is important to finish your work and make sure you are on top of your priorities, but none of that matters if you aren't healthy enough to function at your full capacity.

And suicide should never be more than a distant thought, even if that. I used to think of suicide in high school too because of all the stress i had dealing with my problems, but i never imagined them fully, because i know that it was never a real option for me. No matter what your beliefs are, you are here. Take chances in life to make improvements and joy to your own life and to those around you. Forget the risk, take the fall; if it's something you want, then it's worth a try. Find your passion for life my friend

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ilikeschool

 

you should really consider talking to someone about the effect the loss of your brother has taken on you... also you should talk to your parents about how your feeling about everything... maybe slowing down a bit... get some hobbies...

 

the other thing i was going to say is don't diss school so much... believe it or not you really dont have very many responsibilities... I wish I still had HW and had all my crap paid for... the real world is a pain...

 

keep your chin up... things will come around man... and college is a trip!

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