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Post here instead of contacting your ex!


Nynnja
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I feel like I'm getting to the "numb" stage. Seems like it didn't really happen. Like I imagined it all. Don't know if it's worse to know why you ended it with your confusing reason or just no response. I can't wait to go away and not think about you. Hope to return with a clear mind and over you.

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07/08/2016- The first days you see everything in gray, although colors are supposed to be black/white not in between. I remember the thousands of time I told you that I prefer to stay away from my half-sister, who have done so much damage to me. When you left our apartment, I was devastated and regrettably trusted my sister. The day before yesterday your best friend contacted me, asking if you received some letters. Than, yesterday contacted me as you forgot your social media passwords, and of course I went to the rescue and retrieved your social media accounts. Out of curiosity decided to read and listen my sister and your conversation. Wow! My sister is interested to stay with our apartment, but never though that she will go so far to get what she wants. She recommended you to go to the apartment , to provoke a fight with me so you call me the police and get me off the apartment. She recommended to scare me with losing my job. Just because wanted me out of the apartment and not give me the time frame I needed to move out. I can't believe you went so far to cause me damage. Saying that I deserve everything that is happening to me, man I know that I made mistakes and that I put you through some difficult times, but this far? In the end you did not do anything that my sister suggested, but I feel so betrayed. I even asked my sister for some loans so that I could pay the apartment and you didn't have to worry. I always dreamed of the day you talk me via your phone through whatsapp, I know that that day will come, and you did today to tell me not to take your sister and the kid stuff. Are you serious? Im not interested in any way of staying with stuffs that are yours or family. My reply to you was simple "Im just taking my stuff" and that was the end.

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I am sick of seeing your type of vehicle everywhere. Wish things didn't remind me of you. Hoping that having zero contact of any sort will help. The next person I'm with will be just as into me as I am into them. Wish you hadn't acted like you were.

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I don't know you ended I guess I never will let. I don't know you let your friends have a go at me. I don't know you told me you wanted me back and then denied it the next day. I don't know why you started going out with my friend and lied I don't know why she went on holiday and was lying about being with you. Most of all I don't know why I let you do this to me

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You posted a family photo on facebook. I guess today was your nieces wedding. I wonder if you took a date. Im terrified of seeing what other photos youll post. Who could you possibly take? One of your female friends? Will your family question why im not there. Have you had the guts to tell them you left me?? I want to unfriend you now. I cant take this anymore.

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Hey, it's been almost two years of NC. I just realized that it was 4 days past your birthday. You are still remembered once in awhile and surprisingly I forgot about your birthday... Obviously, I have moved on (maybe?). Now happy and used to be live my life without you. I just hope that our ways wont come across because I still don't know how to deal with it. I think somehow you are still there trying to squeeze somewhere in a tiny space inside my heart .... so I hope I wont see you anymore or else it might be a total breakdown of my heart and soul again!

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I've been fighting with myself all day. I promised that I will stop myself for a month (August 12) from stalking you on social media. I erased instagram and facebook app, didn't deactivated my account although I was thinking of it , but I can't change my life just because you are out of it. I will def stop posting thing about myself and pictures, want to keep a low profile for a while. I can't stand how you think Im with another woman, of course I made you believe that but seriously? Just two days ago I moved out of our apartment and feel like I went to day one. You blocked me from everywhere. In one way I feel proud of myself for acting different. I stop from contacting you, from making a show for everything, and didn't even say nothing about somethings I found out you said about me. Nevertheless, as mentioned earlier, this whole day I've been reading things on how to stop stalking ex on social media, why is it bad, what I can gain from it, even started reading this thing on how to win your ex back. I don't want to get any hope on this, but to see how my change in behavior is causing effect on you. Of course, I know I need to start thinking of myself, but can't stop thinking of you. My friends have been there for me since day one, thanks god and weekends seems to be my fav days of the week. We have so many plans going on for the summer, but it sucks to know that we planned to go on vacation on your bday (August 02) to visit our family and be by our self. But things are this way and I just need to face reality. Thinking if you ever think about me as I do with every beat of my heart.

Edited by luisannalui
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I past the love truck stop we met at the second time we saw each other. We were so happy and excited to see and be with each other then. I had a lump in my throat and anxiety hit me so bad when I started remembering those times. I miss you so much, actually woke up feeling really good today and it.lasted most of the day til I saw that place. I really thought you were the last woman I'd ever be truly happy with. We discussed marriage and how in love we were and we enjoyed each other. But you lied! About all of it. Why? Why did you do that to me. You let me believe these things then destroyed my heart. I will move on you won't beat me. I will find love real love and happiness. Never the less part of my heart is still with you and I want it back you bixxh.

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Sometimes, I think about the awful sense of humor that we had with one another. We used to crack jokes all the time about each other and neither of us would get offended. I miss going to your house and cuddling with you and watching basketball and I miss the fact that whenever I needed someone to cheer me up, you were always a text away.. But now...

I hope every soda you drink already shaken up.I hope your dreams dry like raisins in the baking sun. I hope there's always snow in your driveway

I hope you never get off Fridays, and you work at a Friday's that's always busy on Fridays,I hope you win the lottery and lose your ticket.I hope the zipper on your jacket get stuck and your headphones short, and your charger don't work and you trip and scrape your knees.

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I wonder if you dream about me, because sadly I do about you and now about her, and I hate it... I can't get away from it at all not even when I am suppose to be at rest and peace ( when asleep) I feel you've lied to them about me and claim I am still wanting you, we both know this hasn't been the case for years ( well at least a year an half for definite) I am no threat and wish you would be a real man and tell the truth.

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I'm trying so hard to move on. I've been dreaming about you almost every night and I hate it. I'm struggling to concentrate at work. I'm realizing that you couldn't give me the love I needed for a long time, and that it has turned me into an insecure, uncertain mess. It's not your fault. I think you wanted your feelings to come back...we just broke a long time ago and I didn't want to admit that we couldn't go back, and neither did you. Thanks for trying for so long. I know you're also sad that your feelings couldn't come back.

 

I miss you. You were my plan and my future. Now I have no idea what I'm going to do. I was all in.

 

I hope you're doing ok, whatever you're doing and wherever you are.

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I am sooooooooooo sick of thinking about you still. Over 2 weeks of NC and almost 3 months since I've seen you. You obviously moved on without looking back. Happy with your decision. I wish you hadn't fooled me by saying and acting one way and then going MIA. Are you like this with everyone or was it just me? Please let my trip be the final breaking point in which I do not think about you daily! Hoping and praying

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Almost one year without seeing you or talking to you...after all the years we were together, almost everyday, talking to eachother everyday.

 

Its a really weird feeling. Makes me wonder sometimes if the 10+ years we were together and happy were real, or just some f*** up dream.

 

Its also the first time i write in this post...and honestly i dont even know why i am doing this.

 

Hope everything is going well for you, and for your family also. I miss them all, the saturday dinners, the long conversations...

 

Something that makes me really sad is to not being able to see your nephews grew, i loved them very much, and it breaks my heart that im not able to be with them. Hope they are really happy, they are wonderful children.

 

Last week i think i drove by you, i recognized the licence plate, but didnt see you. The driver was some guy i dont know, guess youre with him now. I felt nothing, which is a good thing.

 

Were complete strangers to eachother now, and i guess thats the way it should be. I hope you understand why i dont talk to you or answer your messages.

 

And also understand why i didnt wish you a happy birthday. I dont want to send you polite happy birthday messages that dont mean anything. All i ever wanted was to spend every birthday of your life right next to you.

 

After all we lived together, theres no other option.

 

Im doing great, our 'daughter' is doing great, she really is the joy of my life and i will be forever grateful towards you, for bringing her to my life.You wouldnt believe how great she is, how grown up and smart she is.

 

Still miss you. You were my best friend and in my mind my partner for life. Guess we wont grow old together and take care of our grandchildren, like we used to talk. Well, thats life.

 

All the best for you.

 

Love, A

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Still thinking of you. Less than yesterday, but still thinking. Hopefully I can get over this feeling soon. I just can't stand how you betrayed me this way and how things ended. You mentioned to my sister that I will get over it, that's how much you cared for my feelings.

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I've been thinking about you more than usual this week. Probably because your birthday is coming up. It hurts just thinking about the amazing summer we had last year and how this summer is so different without you in it. It just hurts. It's been five months NC and thankfully you no longer check up on me. That screwed with my head. I'm proud of myself that I never once reached out to you, but you couldn't seem to let me go. You said you wanted me to keep being in your life and at first I thought that was better than not having you in it, but I quickly realized I didn't want to be downgraded from girlfriend to good friend. That's the part I don't get. We were best friends and lovers. I don't know what went wrong. I wish I never met you.

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So today I decided to speak with one of your friends (Bad move) I told her that whenever you decides to allow me see the kid I'll be always available. She replied by saying that you told her that you will never allow me to go close to your son. I can't stand all of this hate, all of this situation that is happening. I was there for him every day, I was there for him emotionally and financially- and yet you taking your personal anger toward him? I understand is your biological son, but for got sake! People don't change, you just get to know them over time.

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AND I know for sure is because of the woman that I brought in to our apartment after you left. Because even days after you left you told the baby sitter that you will allow me to see him, than you got back with baby daddy, and to not make him mad you said it was not good idea. Man, I have nothing with that woman, although it looks like is a yes, I'm just trying to live with reality and accept the fact that you and him are not part of my life anymore.

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I am so disgusted right now. I took you to all my favorite places. How annoying. I can't even start over on a date without thinking of you. Why did you lead me on? If something was missing you should have ended it sooner. So pissed off right now...

 

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Wow I really fell for you. You were just happy to have a new boyfriend and I knew you weren't over your ex and meanwhile I was obsessed with you. Couldn't get enough of you. I just never understood how you never loved me back until now. And my god all the signs and red flags I missed. I should've seen the breakup coming a mile away. I even brought food to your house at your request and I still left in tears.

 

I hope to god that one day you realize how special I was to you and I hope you regret April 14 and all the weeks after of you playing with my emotions. I hope you realize how much of a good person I am and how much I didn't deserve to be treated like that.

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