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Post here instead of contacting your ex!


Nynnja
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You've turned into a rat. The problem is you don't even realise it. Keep me on the back burner? The woman you say you love. Who you know loves you. Who you've been close with. Are you really that angry / blinded that you can't see me any more? Or is the lure of fun, drink, new girls, well and freedom too much. I guess so. She was nice to you, just as I was having a go at you... She knew it too, cos you told her. Nice one chick. Bravado. Selfish t*at/s.

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I am thinking about calling you tomorrow. I don't know. I keep thinking about you. We spent last Christmas together. I mean, honestly, I am just realizing how judgmental you were of me when we were together. I don't really want to share a whole lot with you because you judge. I wouldn't mind seeing how you are doing, but let me tell you, I don't want to know if you found someone new. I am not going to ask, but there's always a chance you may volunteer information.

 

It's a tough judgment call. I called you a few days ago, but your phone wasn't on. I took it as a sign that I shouldn't be calling you.

 

I honestly don't even really know what to say to you. There is still so much pain in my heart regarding US.

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This is killing me. I have a few days off from work..My distraction is at work. Now that it's just me here I am killing myself thinking about you. I would call today, but I'm sure you're busy today with all your Christmas stuff.

 

I have been cleaning my room, and finding old things that I wrote about you. I'm getting nostalgic over here.

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You didn't send me a Christmas text, nor did I send you one. This holiday season has been 'very rough for me. I miss our little family. I gave you all I had, and you threw me away. I miss your daughter in a big way, I hope she had a great christmas. I feel very alone right now. You were the best thing I ever had in my life, before you became the worst

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I know now that you were a monster. that what you did to me was the worst thing imaginable. It will take me time to know that is the truth every moment, because for now it hurts too much to know that the person I loved most in the world did this to me. What you did to our children, our family. You were a monster. I loved you so much, and never knew you were a monster.

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merry christmas you selfish b!itch. just kidding i know i was tough to deal with. im sort of thankful you broke it off. i realized just how little i was working on my life and got it back together, but not after suffering the breakup. i guess i expected you to tell me everything will be ok, and that i need to focus on myself. maybe you did, maybe i just didn't listen. either way i'm moving on.

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my ex and I took the decision to separate several months ago, though we only started living apart in early july.

 

I'd love to contact her and ask her if we could start a relationship again. Its a huge hole in my life not being involved with her, and I struggle thinking I'll never be able to ever have that sort of relationship again.

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I get that feeling. Something that comes with spending a fair amount of time on facebook, is I think you might "like" something..and then you don't. I get the thought to look on your profile, but I know it wouldn't be good for me. I didn't call you yesterday. It didn't feel right. Maybe tomorrow or the next day. I only get the weekends and holidays to call you now, because otherwise we're both at work, or you're probably exhausted from work.

 

I wonder if your phone will even be on. I wonder if it will feel right to call.

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I talked to you on the phone today for the first time in 10 weeks. I took the chance you may volunteer some information about your love life. You didn't really. I mean, you told me you finally changed your facebook relationships status to single, about a month ago. Your sister asked who you were talking to on the phone. You said "My girlfriend...Becky". Not sure if that means you like a girl named Becky, or that name just popped into your head. Becky? Of all names...Oh well, we are both moving on. I like someone. You may like someone. I'm not sure. I'm tempted to take a look at your POF profile and see how you changed it. I mean, it's too early to talk about each others' love lives. Even the slight mention of those things made me feel a bit weird. I don't look at your profile for a reason. I don't want to know.

 

Anyway, it's done now, and I may not talk to you on the phone for another 10 weeks...or longer. There's no reason to really talk to you. We can't really be friends. It still hurts too much.

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I wonder if it was a mistake to call you. I'm glad I got it out of my system, but I could have probably waited forever. Now I have to wait forever again to gain the same sort of self-satisfaction. I mean, what did I really accomplish calling you? Nothing. 10 weeks has been the longest I have gone. I keep going longer without calling you. I honestly only really felt ok calling you because I like someone else right now and all the holiday awkwardness had past between me and my family.

 

I am really looking forward to going back to work and being around people again. Come Monday..

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This website is about to become my best friend.....

 

You're not my ex yet because you're still sitting in the loungeroom watching TV.

 

We did nothing wrong, you were my best friend who i fell in love with. We didnt know this wouldnt work. Im after something different and I dont think you're ready to let go of your single life. Ive lost me and youve lost you. I cant take you away from you, i care for you too much.

 

I love you and Ill miss you for as long as i walk this earth.

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It's been 2 months since we broke up i remember how you used to look at me and just smile because that's how happy i made you feel. I'm sorry for the way i was the last 10days but did we really have to throw things away. Remember how you wanted us to be official so bad? Why can't you come back. I miss you so much i guess the new one's treating you better because he's not as stupid as me to take you for granted. I wonder if i'll ever stop regretting the way i acted. Your personality was amazing and you're more than beautiful ( if only i said this 2 months ago) i just really miss you. I'm so sorry for ever hurting you, but i've been crying almost everyday, i can't go on like this. Will i ever find someone again? Someone like you? Probably not. It sickens me just imagining you two getting sexual, i can't stop comparing every girl i meet to you. It sucks! Everyones been getting in a relationship recently, and everyone seems so happy, remember how happy we were? Now you're happy with someone else. All it took was a month after we ended? I was hoping it's a rebound but it doesn't seem like it all. You were only in my life for 5-6months, but that's the most i've ever let someone in my life. You were the one person i thought could never hurt me, i left my guard down. I now know better, never take someone for granted and to let my guard up. I just want to be happy again, just like you're happy right now. Thank god i'm off to university in 9-10months and i'll be moving. So at least i know this pain won't be here the next year. But i don't want to wait a year i just want you but i know that's never going to happen

 

Goodbye my love

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Wish you hadn't contacted and responded. Good though, I saw what a selfish, misguided tool you are again. True to form. Just took a lot of energy out of me, and set me back in my healing. Weirdly I was just about to block you when you contacted. I was set on it. Almost calm about it. Now, it's churned it all up again. Going over old events, churning up bitterness, anger. Dealing with you. It's like starting again and I can't afford to do that. Just annoyed that today I gave a little of my power away. I was doing well. Talked to a friend and got angry. Had a go at you again, which you'll also think is true to form and you will shut down. Just noise to you. Confirms why we split. Oh well I guess, we're only human. Fragile. Make mistakes. Move on. I've defriended you now, will block you when my computer lets me. Life is as it was before, this just got in the way. One thing I know is that I love you, but we can't be together. At least we are on the same page. You would destroy me. I'd make you unhappy. Maybe you've got something for a song there?! I will restore. Life will go on. NC is for a very good reason. Just don't contact me again, although my heart pines for you.

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so much about us was unspoken and understood. only when i started losing my self worth did that begin to change. i was not growing, causing my own life to come to a halt, a grind, with no progress. now i know how i must feel before we talk again. i need to have my life going the way i want it again. i have to rekindle my ambitions and take what is mine. only when i have that attitude can i even begin to think about taking you back. how silly that i've kept talking to you for this long while i still have hope, it's laughable! i should have self respect and at least ponder the consequences of getting back together. i should seriously think about it, not just jump back in out of attachment, that's what caused problems in the first place. you're silent because you understand, and probably don't want to deal with it/hurt me. maybe you're worried, maybe you don't care, maybe you're hurt/offended, maybe you're seeing someone. the truth is i need to focus on how you make me feel, not how i make you feel. and right now, i think we need space. i need my space to heal from the break up. and i shouldn't have kept talking to you, it's only made it so much worse. i've been so anxious to say the right things to make sure you like me that i've given our relation a very awkward and tense vibe. i responded to every thing you said after you left out of attachment, not because i genuinely liked you, because i still don't forgive you for dumping me... but i want to be with you so bad... i hope you understand. i really hope you do. and as hard as it is to say right now, i wish you all the best.

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