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[feejruin]

i remember you saying "i cant bear to see you hurt"

 

words mean nothing

[yonanz]

My dearest princess,

 

Why is it that every morning when I open my eyes, and every night when I close my eyes, your the first thing that comes to my mind? I so badly want to be happy on my own, but I realise whatever happiness I have deep inside has been taken away the day you left me. Love tiptoes so silently when it arrives but leaves with a BIG BANG! It left my whole world upside down and everything inside shattered, but its OK. I'll live.

 

One of the hardest things in life is letting go of something you hold so dear to your heart. I would rather see you happy without me, than unhappy with me. In our relationship I have always insisted on things my way and you, your way. But at this moment I have decided to be your gentlemen and bow away gracefully. I know our arguments and quarrels over the past many months have drained you already and I dont want to still argue or quarrel with you over possibly one of the most painful and difficult decisions you had to make. I respect your decision, although I didnt agree with it, simply because I love you.

 

There's no been a day without me dwelling upon guilt after guilt, regrets after regrets. But I realised things just happened for a reason, humans make mistakes, love hurts and we lose in order to grow. Without taking a step back I wouldnt have seen what Im seeing now. I dont hate you for hurting me, just like I hope you dont hate me for hurting you. Words cannot convey the remorse I feel, nor take away the awful things I've done or said. But believe me when I say I have never meant to hurt you in that manner, and I would do anything just to see you happy and hurt-free once more. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to grow and mature, and to see ourselves and all that we have been through in a clearer perspective.

 

My greatest wish is never to repeat the same mistakes again, and never to hurt anyone the way I did in our r/s. Only time will tell if we are ever meant to be again, and I hope if that time truly comes, I can be a better man who is truly deserving of your love and beauty

[hairybda]

i see on msn, you've changed your name, to your new BF last name.

 

weird. i

 

we were together 6 years, and in matter of weeks, you have made him your new love, and changed your names. i don't know whether to believe your happy, or your just trying to make people think your happy.

 

its 4 am, i can't sleep and i am thinking about you. if you were here, i would go wake you up.. and we would chat. i miss this.

 

i wonder after 6 years, do you still think about me? i think about you all the time. i know you are with another guy now... i wonder what you chat about.. if your chatting with him, and you see something you and i used to laugh about.. do you bring it up?

 

when you drive down the road.. do you still look for audis? haha i do still.

[paulod]

Its been 6 weeks, I miss you so much,I miss being with you, miss everything about you,you were my friend and my lover and now you're gone.

 

I'm really lost at the moment. I want to look into your eyes and tell you how much I love you, So many things I want to say to you but I cant. Why did you have to leave when you love me still?? we were so close to sorting it all out and you gave up on us. Do you think about us?? I cant get you out of my head, Ive tried to block you out, tried to move on but I cant. I cry every day, so much regret and guilt.

 

I made a mistake in keeping that from you,why did I do that?? no one is perfect, I got scared that I'd lose you if I'd told you. Why did you go snooping?? I tried so hard to sort it and you couldn't see that. You are angry, I do understand, so many things going on in your head it must be so difficult for you to trust me now.

 

Weird thing is, now we're split I'm sorting out all the issues that broke us up?? wont be long before all the baggage is gone, it's what we constantly talked about..

 

Want so bad to hold you, who knows if we're ment to be...I really do hope so, you are my one and only

I miss you my beautiful Sinorita

[lilyofthemount]

how do dreams have connections in our present situation?

do you believe in dreams.. how does it speak to us.

it is almost 6 weeks since my break up wit my ex and i never had contact with him, the last two nights i have dream of him and it is almost both at the same time. he used to call me when we have a fight when we are still in a relationship and this last two nights i wake up with a dream about him exactly the same time with his last two calls wehn we break off.(details of the dream later)

I wanted to call him to know how is he but i am afraid he might take it as me trying to rush back to him. Is it posible he is thinking about me and considering a second chance.. I wish i could talk to him but common sense says.. no.Any thoughts from you guys is greatly appreciated..

[jenmar]

your missing out because i am so awesome! you commitment phobe

[feejruin]

FB says "smitten"

 

and here you are complaining "i cant rememebr how our conversations were before. but i know it aint like this. faxcinating"

[o_hopeless_o]

i reallly love, and soon loved you, and you kept everything. why are you like this? i gave everything and my all. you dont rememeber just 5 days ago we were laying in bed, laughing having fun? saying i love yous and telling how much we mean to each other? and the whole week before that? and how excited you were to see me? where did it all go wrong? ive done everything to make you happy and anything you asked for. why am i not good enough now? i wish it all worked out. i wanted great things for us. and it makes me mad how i really want to hate you but i cant but i know your such an a$$hole for everything. i miss you, and i keep dreaming random things about you. do you think of me? do you miss me? why do you always say you love me yet you dont want to be with me? saying how i cant be easily replaced and all this bs? we had a REALLY good thing, a great thing. we ARE compatible and you know it. what do you just want to party? all you care about are you fraternity brothers? your best friend is single now you have to be? i dont know you anymore. and i really wished that god had put you in my life for the reason to be with you for a long time but i think that ship has sailed, but i really wished that was what it was. i wish you were the guy god put in my life to love forever and youd love me the same. it hurts to not hear you. to see you. to touch you. i know ill make it through but i wanted to be with you. i wanted to have so many memories with you and experience things with you. just to be happy with you and be together. why did you lie to me? how did this relationship fall apart?

 

i thought we were working on everything and we both were happy, you told me you wanted this. your responsible for everything you've said and just a few short days after seeing you its all over? what you dont know about anything? dont you remember holding my hand and youd stare in my eyes and tell me how much you loved me and kiss me afterwards and make me laugh. what the h3ll happened to that all? what the hell did i do? and now its just over. all done. im suppose to let it all go now. you want me to forget you. why cant i have a fast forward and erase botton. i officially have lost you. why is having you out of my life so hard, but it seems for you its okay but you still love me. im not the right girl for you but yet your saying idk. you sound so unsure sometimes about letting me go. why couldnt you have just been someone to be in love and stay in love and not give up? i even feel stupid writting this and i know your probably all cozy in your bed not giving a about me, when i wish you would. wish you would think i made a mistake i need her. i want to think i was that special to you were it WILL be hard to replace me. because i am and was for you everything you asked for. i dont know how many girls you think will do the things i did... cause personally love like this doesnt happen all the time. your an idiot for letting me go. i want to wish you happiness and i sort of do, but its for sure not happiness with someone else. maybe happiness in life, but definitely i dont want you happy with someone else and to erase the memories of me. i hope even though its bad to be the girl you regret to lose. the one who can say, "i made a mistake." stupid? your telling me.

[marshmlofluff]

At two weeks I longed for you to call, so I could have you back.

 

At eight weeks, you called. I didn't answer.

 

It was ten weeks yesterday. Now I wish you would call so I could tell you that I don't ever want you in my life again.

[Saudade]

You are the worst disappointment of my life... I trusted you when you said you loved me...You took so long to say and when you finally did I thought you meant it for real.

 

I am mad at myself today because I allowed you to make me a fool....Yeh thats exactly how I feel...A fool...for believing that you loved me for real.

 

I know one day you will regret....but I dont want you to come back and beg for me to take you back..I want you to live thinking how happy you d be if had chose to be with me.

 

 

YOU are BIG LOSER!!!

[hairybda]

its 3:30 am.. i just woke up.. and of course i am thinking about you. i wonder what your thinking. did you think about me today?

[paulod]

Hi,

woke up thinking about you, I do love and miss you very much, you're the one who's missing out you do know that?? I would love and treat you right for all time, I think you know I would too, was willing to give up everything and move so we could live together and you say that you wern't the one for me?? you were but you cant admit that you were wrong in ending it

wonder if you think about me??

You should have let it go,moved on, that's what I wanted to do. Instead you're hanging onto demons of the past and wont give them up, it's broken us!it's broken you my love..I hope one day you'll heal and forgive past mistakes, we've both made them, both said stupid things in arguments we don't mean, been stubborn with each other, been off with each other but I guess I was able to forgive you a lot sooner than you can forgive me. Time is a great healer so they say....I'm beginning to see that it is, I hope you are too.

[petite]

It's okay.

[lovexo]

hes not my ex. but i found this and i need to vent. I love you so much, but you are killing yourself and i cant bear to see it anymore..i feel so deeply sad for you and your addiction. You are running away from anything, numbing your pain. Your life isn't that bad?!?! what are you so scared of? Why are you running away? You know this is affected our relationship and it seems like you just dont give a damn. You wont come to bed with me at night, cuz you are up allll night doing pill after pill after pill. I need you, i need your love..you say i am your first priority but that is BULLS***!!!!!!!! Drugs are and you know that!!! I am scared to leave you because i know that you wouldn't come back to me, you would chose the drugs. You say you love me, you say you are supporting my sobriety!!! WHAT???? how is that???? I know i need to leave you...but i cant because i love you, and i cant leave you when you are hurting, and you are..but you deny it. HOw can i leave u when u need me the most right now! but i can handle this anymore. I cant sit here and watch you numb away everything..push me away. I know you love me more than life itself..and would do anything for me..well you say that...how can i believe that when what your doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am sooooooooooo mad, hurt...i can deal...i cant deal. im on my breaking point. sat by a river today and contemplated driving right into it.

[petite]

I am such an idiot, really. I should have known better! When will I learn for once? I was doing so well. I'm glad I didn't break NC, because if you wanted, you would have made a move by now. It's actually the opposite. You have completely moved on completely and pushed me and out of your life. Which is just fine. I don't know you anymore. Back to learning. C'est la vie!

[jenmar]

I wish I wouldn't have acted like an idiot after we broke up and just gave you time when you agreed you wanted to try and work it out....

sometimes I think if I handled it differently we could have gotten back together.

 

its been 10 days since I heard from you.

dont' u miss me.

[restingpieces]

I have to stick to my word. That's what you would want me to do. But today, I can't breathe. My heart is aching. My mind is racing. My thoughts and love are itching to be shared with you. I started a blog today, I'll be writing you letters. Hopefully, this will do.

 

I fear it won't. I have hope, but, I have no promises.

[feejruin]

"miss u" u said

 

youll never know how much i do too.

[o_hopeless_o]

today is hard. i woke up and thought of you. cried a little bit more. i miss you. i want you want. i love you. if its in gods will i want you back and us to work. have you been missing me or thinking about me or us? do you miss me laying in bed with you? waking up next to you with lots of kisses to give? im having a weak moment and after the event that happened yesterday there is absolutely no point in ever making contact. i want to really badly though. i wanna hear you voice, i want to hold your hand. whats going on with you? i know our relationship and love isnt just going to disappeear. how could you let go of it so easily? why did you give up?

[spentspark]

you're going to be home in two days, and and i moved out a month ago, when you asked me to, so i won't be there. when you arrive. I haven't seen you in two months and i think about you all the time. i can't sleep, i have no appetite - sometimes i feel crazy because i can't stop thinking about you. you seem strong, and really over this, and the distance and coldness has brought me an understanding that there isn't hope, though i continue to look for straws to grasp at - ugh - it's a horrible feeling. there are only two reasons for us to talk or see each other, intentionally. you owe me lots of money, but i've sked, and you've blown me off, so i assume that you'll continue to do so. that leaves only the other one. i have your cat. I don't need to answer if you text, or pick up if you call - lord knows you've ignored me. but i guess i really do have to communicate with you so you can get your cat back. i am so torn -can't decide whether it would be better knowing you were there to pick her up while i wasn't around, or arranging so that we have to see each other. i so want to see you but i'm so afraid it'll be a rush of terrible emotion. i just don't know what to do. i'm dreading it.

[feejruin]

where did you spend your weekend ?

[pinecone]

god, i feel low. but i won't tell you this anymore. you can't help. i can help myself.

[PKNY]

Seeing you this weekend made me wish I could just call you now, I can't help feeling like if I could just show you the work I've doing we could work things out. I want so badly to call you right now and ask you out for a drink but I know I'll just end up hurting myself

[jenmar]

i am better than what your willing to offer.

[BobbyC]

As bittersweet as it's going to be, I'm looking forward to seeing you tomorrow....