Jump to content

Post here instead of contacting your ex!


Recommended Posts

Tonight while I was taking a shower I remembered us taking a shower together and how we would always end it with the hottest water we could tolerate. And we'd stand there, sometimes hugged, just enjoying the water.

It's really difficult for me to fully understand what it means to not see you anymore. Ever. From spending the most of these past 2 years and 8 months with each other to this. Not knowing what we're up to, if we're okay, if we're happy, if we have children. But it has to be this way, I can only be your girlfriend or nothing at all. You were my best friend while we were together but I can't be friends with you outside our RS.

 

I truly hope you're okay. I want the best for you. Love you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I overheard this girl in my class today talking about how her ex left her roses and an Ipad on her front door step last night. There was a letter telling her that he still loved her and I couldn't help but feel this sting of jealously because I wish you would do something similar. It's stupid, but my hope is if you are regretting your decision, that you will do something on Valentine's Day.. but I know that in reality, nothing will happen... This is just so frustrating to me. I'm trying to do things that make me happy and do things that better myself, but I still want you... and I don't feel happy at all. I hope that you would contact me soon... Why did this have to happen and why did you **** everything up!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

In a half hour you will be at my house and we will exchange things. I am not sure what to expect. I am not sure i will get to say the speech I've gone over a hundred times in my head, or if I even want to say it anymore.

 

Of course I hope that eventually we will try again, but until that happens I am going to be moving on, and that way if it doesn't, it won't matter to me.

 

I don't think I can open my heart again. Not for a very long time. You have asked to be friends but I need to remove you from my life. Go ahead and miss me, it means nothing when there is a "but" or "I hope we can one day be friends" after it.

 

I am 24 and hopeless when it comes to love, or healthy relationships. You've unintentionally made me feel guilty about our relationship and regretful.

 

It is what it is. Hopefully I can rip the bandaid off tonight and then be done with it

Link to comment
Share on other sites

OMG.

 

I miss you like crazy tonight. I just keep thinking of you and wanting you and wanting to hold you and kiss you.

 

Did I make a mistake in ending things? I felt so rejected by you and so hurt. I am so depressed and low and sad and lonely.

 

I was falling in love with you.

 

Now I will always feel like you were the one that got away.

 

I hate ME tonight.

 

I just want you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Really? "I don't want anyone to own me?" Have you yet to make a single friend outside of her hometown? What are you doing with your life?

 

Here is what it looks like... waiting out your time as a parent, and hers, until afterwards you and she can pick up and move somewhere together. What a fng ******* you are to hide behind your truth. Or maybe you don't even know.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why did you have to contact me? You miss me? Well I miss you too. I miss you a lot. Talking to you made me realise how much of each others' life we've missed.

 

I want you still. I want to try again with you even though I know it might not work. I want to see you again. You talking to me makes it feel like day 1 of the breakup all over again now. Why did you have to tell me I could contact you anytime? You might be okay with it but all it does is hurt me. So much. I'm still in love with you even if you've managed to "bury" your feelings. You said you feel stupid for breaking up with me because you know what you've lost but... It doesn't help. I want you... It hurts. You said I brought back your feelings the minute we saw each other. I felt the same, it's like we just broke up again.

 

I miss you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, today is the beginning of a new life for me hopefully. I got an interview for a job that is would make me more financially stable (something you always needed me to be). Look at me, all dressed up in this suit that you were so very attracted to me in. Heh. I also am awaiting your response to the last email I sent you. You said you needed to "digest it" and you would get back to me today. I'm really hoping that your reasoning to "digest" it is because you're thinking about a reconciliation...but deep down I know that this probably won't happen. It will probably be a "goodbye, I love you, I'll always love you, blah,blah,blah"...Well, I'm sorry, but if you loved me, you would stick beside me while I work on, and improve myself. Maybe it's too much for you to take...but if that's the case then just tell me you don't love me anymore.

You said you sent the ring back...but I almost doubt it. I would be happy about that if it was because you were having second thoughts...but I also know you're procrastination...and I feel that is probably why I haven't received it yet.

 

Well...who knows? Let's see what happens...the ball, as usual, is in your court.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You can't bear to contact me because it makes you feel guilty. And so it should. For someone who claimed that honesty was fundamental, you fell very short of your own standards. Although I should have perhaps realised that cowardice always trumps honesty.

 

You came close to breaking me but broken hearts mend.

 

I am the one that got away.

 

Poor, poor you!

 

The Wide-Mouthed-Frog is lovely but she is not your salvation. She, like me, and the one that came before, deserves someone who can give as well as take. So she'll be heading for the hills once she works out what a fraud you are.

 

Sad, sad man in a prison of your own making.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't believe what you told me in your last email. I refuse to believe you're that good of an actress, because you should be in Hollywood if you are.

 

Somehow you've managed to convince yourself of so many things that just aren't true, just so you can pretend you did the right thing. Probably have your friends thinking I treated you like crap or that I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I was always there for you, and we both know that. You're the one that wasn't there for me.

 

I'm never gonna find another one like you, but you're never gonna find another one like me either.

 

I'm so dumb for even thinking any of this instead of facing the facts and forcing myself to wake up, which is that you left and you don't want me in your life and never will again. If what you told me actually is true, then I'm the stupidest guy on the planet... for giving so much of myself to you while you used me then discarded me. I'd rather believe you're not that evil.

 

And would you believe that I still would like for us to be friends? Something is seriously wrong with me...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's been a week of no contact now. Serious no contact. I just miss you. I just really, really miss my best friend and having someone I can talk to anything about and care for. I know getting in contact won't help and I've no idea about your feelings but I just miss my best friend so much and I'm having a hard time getting over the fact that you are gone.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was ill yesterday, I miss being able to pass the time messaging you and having you worried about me. Like a fool I messaged you anyway and where so disinterested. Why did I expect you to care like you did before? I'm so angry at myself for breaking NC. You worked your way back into my head and heart by contacting me. I really don't know how much more heartbreak I can take. If I ignore you, it hurts. If I talk to you, it hurts. There's no way out.

 

Never did I think you would be the cause of all this suffering. Why did you have to do this? I have so many thoughts whirling around in my head and most of them are causing me pain.

 

I'm still jealous of your friends and coworkers who see you everyday. I hate this so much. There's nobody like you. But you're not going to find anyone like me either. Someone so committed to you. Why do you think this affects me so much more? It's because I invested my whole being into this relationship. I've been dead ever since you left. I've got nothing left to show for it because I put everything into the relationship I thought was invincible.

So congratulations on breaking me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can feel you're missing me after dumping me! If my begging and pleading didn't work for you, then, dumping you (at least on my mind through NC) will absolutely work. I had enough for losing my dignity and humiliation. Wish you all the best but *$%**ing wish you would feel the same devastation and pain I'm feeling right now or even more than that!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I had a dream about you last night, a terrible dream. My sister and I were driving past your house and it was empty. No car in the driveway, nothing, you were gone. You and my replacement had moved to a new place.

 

I immediately woke up, my heart was pounding. I felt so scared. Sad. Alone. I cried for the rest of the night. And now I'll begin my day running on 2 hours of sleep.

 

I loved you so much. Still love you. I'm slowly getting over it, as its my only option. I miss you so much at times, and I hope I cross your mind every once in a while. Have a lovely day at work.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think I want to call you up but then I imagine having nothing to say. Awkward! And I imagine how much etter it will be to see you later, not now. And better for it to be happenstance.

 

When I wasn't crying I was full of smiles. When I wasn't judging you I was wanting you. I like it, inside your inner sanctum.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You said you loved me but replaced me like i was nothing, i was falling more in love with you over the years and you strung me along til someone else came along. You wrote 'It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all', You can say that because you are happy with your new man and have wiped me from your mind, you wrote that hoping to relieve the guilt you maybe feeling. I have to live with this pain of betrayal, I have to live with the one sided love, the dreams, the anger, the emptiness. While your moving on like nothing happened I am clinging on. I will get better, I will move on but the scars you left will still be there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am moving on in a sense...I've gotten temporary work and am trying to do more things. But in all honesty, in my down moments I still feel empty, I still feel incomplete without you. For some reason you provided me with some internal stability and I don't know why. I think about you less and less and yet I still miss your personality, your face and your hug. I know I'm strong enough to live without you but I'm scared that there won't be another. I wish I had a brother or a sister. If they had a family I wouldn't have to feel so lonely?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Are you really that heartless of a human being that after all our time together you need to post pictures of him in places we used to go? You scroll down your instagram page and you have me in the same seat, switched around, eating food. I honestly do not understand what I did that you feel the need to show everyone and the world how good your new relationship is and how happy you are and over me? All I ever did was provide you with love, care and attention and now I might as well have no existed in your life and it is absolutely ****ing horrible. It truly shows that you honestly never did give a **** and have no regret in any of your actions in the relationship or a breakup. I will not contact you again. I will not be hopeful you reconcile. Not anymore. When this collapses around you, which it will, because you haven't addressed anything which made our relationship go sour, you'll think of me. You'll look through letters, through old Facebook messages, posts, pictures, your twitter, your instagram and you'll think of me. You'll start to cry and probably try to get in contact and I am not ever, ever going to dignify you with a response. Right now I am hurting. I continue to hurt because I love you, but I can never, ever be with you again or have you in my life again. Not even when I feel indifferent about you. Everything you have done to me smacks of you feeling absolutely nothing toward me and NO-ONE deserves that. I truly hope that you have never treated anyone like this before because it is absolutely horrific and I hope you learn your lesson from it. There is no way we could have ever, ever meant to be together and despite the memories I have it has truly not been worth it because I have so much hurt and scars from this relationship. There is no way we can ever reconcile and I was a fool to ask you for a promise and to trust in your words after never trusting you before. Be happy. It will never ever be with me because of what you have done to me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I got an A for both my exam results so far. I wish you knew. I'm so proud of myself for working through these exams and knowing that so far I've had 'A's even with all the heartbreak I was going through while studying. Well I just wanted to tell you that so far, I'm passing. I think you'd be proud of me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

(Wow, okay I am posting here a lot. Apologies, it keeps me sane.)

 

You still confuse me. Ever since you tried talking to me again, you've just brought that confusion back to the surface. Just when I was starting to accept, well, be resigned to really, the fact I didn't quite understand your motives and actions.

 

I mean, overlooking the confusion that everyone faces, "why would you hurt me this much? After all we shared and cherished how can you do a face heel turn now? " because let's be honest, I'll never get an answer that will satisfy me. You hurt me and that's all there is to it. Looking for answers to it is pointless.

 

Well, you surprised me when you gave me the old line "I love you, but I'm not in love" and your only reason for that was because we hadn't spoke since the breakup. How good for you that you can stop being in love with me after two months NC even though we had known each other for six years. Yeah, you said you can easily fall back in love every time you see me, and yes, I feel the same. That still makes me upset though, I haven't once stopped being IN love with you since then.

 

I don't really know why I think over the things you say aso long after you said them. There's no point in analysing it from this or that angle. It changes nothing, I know. But still I do and I'm not sure why... I think it's the little things you say that makes me think about it. The things that give me hope still... "No matter what happens between us, I'll fall in love with you again and again if I see you"- I don't know if that makes me happy or sad... I feel the same way but..

 

"I let this go. And for what? For nothing. I had the perfect guy, and I let him go" - Why don't you want to try again then? I'm right there and you didn't ask for it.

 

"If you were here, we'd be together. If I was there, we'd be together"- Well why didn't you just hold out...I was going to be there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...