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Post here instead of contacting your ex!


Nynnja
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First of all, you weren't a rebound. But, i am not going to grovel to you anymore, you are arrogant. You say i'm nasty and aggressive? Well, you're evasive and non responsive. And, don't for a minute think i wanted to meet up to get back with you, that wasn't the case. It's called "common decency", resolving everything so we can both move forward.

 

Putting anymore energy into you is a waste of time. I am trying to let go with positive feelings and i will know better next time to select somebody who is accountable.

 

I want a woman, not a little girl!

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Today's my birthday. Did you remember? I bet you did. I bet some part of you realized the date-- maybe even started dreading it earlier in the week-- and you thought about me, if only for a brief moment. Either way, I'm happy you thought about me. I'm happy you haven't forgotten about me entirely. But it still hurts that you didn't at least send an email. I guess this is you moving on.

I still miss you, my little sophomore.

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I told you that I didn't want to become like you wanting sex only and that's why I had to end things with us. I feel happier now and at peace with myself. I don't think about sex as a short term goal with you or anyone. I will try again with someone new when the time is right. I don't have any hard feelings about what happened. I wish that someday that I can talk to you again and see you again but not to have any sort of relationship with you, just to find out how you are doing. Things may not have worked out with us, but I want you to find happiness just as I hope to find it too for myself. That is how I feel today. I took a chance with you in the hopes of discovering something about myself and I did. I discovered that I can survive and move on.

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Been listening to Big Girls Don't Cry... (ok, I admit I've been crying)

 

I wish that I could tell you:

That this has nothing to do with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightenin' out to do

 

And this:

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It's time to be a big girl now

 

And:

The path that I'm walking

I must go alone

I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown

Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?

And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay

 

And finally:

But it's time for me to go home

It's getting late, dark outside

I need to be with myself and center, clarity

Peace, Serenity

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Oh my so up and down today. Do i call you for my stuff, or do i sweat a bit more about it and wait till your interview to wish you good luck, and take it from there. Mind is all over the place. If i wait till long, will it really be over for good. OR are you waiting for me. So confused - know how you feel now

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I loved you. I love you still. I hate the pain and sometimes I hate you for causing it--but even through the anger and the pain I love you still. If I saw you I would fall into your arms.

 

We got along. If something was bothering you, why didn't you just tell me?

 

Why didn't you give us a chance?

 

---

I am going through the same thing... you said you would always be honest with me, but you weren't. You turned your back on me.. Why didn't you give us a chance?

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well. I want to thank you for showing me your true colours. I am such a fool. Such a fool for thinking you were different. Such a fool for thinking you cared.

Such a fool for thinking you werent selfish.

Geez, you even fooled most of my friends.

But at least now I can hate you. Heck I dont think I even care enough to hate you. I think i actually dont give a $ * * * * anymore.

To think, three days ago, I was still entertaining the thought of us still having a chance....I cant believe you would sit there at the game with me, let alone accept my invitation knowing full well what a scheming, coniving son of a ***** you were being. AND then you had the nerve to lie yesterday and pretend like you knew nothing?

I hope you have a great life and you find what youre looking for. I personally think youre going to be single for a long long time. You cant treat people this way for long. It'll suck once you wake up and realize what you did, and what you gave up. I hope those two sneaks give you the attention that you need. Cause you cant come to me for it anymore.

I cant believe I wasted four depressed months on you. You really had me fooled.

BTW. Yes you will hear from me one more time, when you get my one last email. Sorry but you have to deal with the consequences. I will not let you get away with it. You cant ignore that too and think it will just go away.

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i dont understand you at all...but maybe im complicating you too much. you're just selfish. and you took what was convenient. i know you didn't break up with her. you did it to catch my sympathies; you really think of i'm that stupid? but the fact that you can still play games with me and still try to control me after i knew you slept with her..it's disgusting...what did SHE do to deserve ANY sort of respect?? did she go through even an INKLING of what i did to be with you? SHE DID NOTHING BUT F***! i hate you, i wish i could clean you off my memory for making me so ashamed to call you 'my first love'...

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There are so many things I want to say to you. In such a short time you really had an incredible impact on me. I'm certain my insecurity pushed you to breaking up. And then it flared up in a big way afterwards. I was crushed by the results of my own actions. You were doing what was best for you.

 

I have realized so much what I need to do live a better life. I had a good one before you. With you I saw a future of a great one. And now that you are gone, I have realized what I have to do to have a great one with or without you.

 

I know I have more work to do. And it will be a never ending process of always improving. I want to hope that one day you will want to know how I am doing. But that isn't the best for me. Everyday I have to remind myself to say goodbye to you.

 

I still feel like it is crazy that my feelings are so strong for someone I was still really getting to know. But I saw something very special in you. You are incredible and I want nothing but wonderful things for you.

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We were literally 3 feet from each other, and not even hi. seriously.. are we really that childish?... such stupid uncomfortable situations.. I HATE Friday nights... wish I didn't have to see you twice a week. Wish I was really far away...

 

I can't believe that from a perfect day, feeling really happy, I went down to crying.. soo pathetic...

 

I knew I was the one that was gonna get hurt in the end.. I always cared for you to make sure you wouldn't get hurt, but really I should have never given you a chance, why did I actually give in to your flirting? You came after me for months, where did all that passion go... ? Why did I give you a chance... I knew this was probably not gonna work.. why did I let myself go into fantasy land? I knew I am too nice of a person to eevr hurt anyone, I knew I was not gonna hurt you like this.. but why didn't I protect myself from harm... ? You don't deserve me crying for you.. but yet I am...

 

Funny thing is that if you read this, you would actually get mad at me, and tell me that I am trying to manipulate your feelings, trying to make you feel bad.. it is always just about you, you you isn't it...? ............ screw you........

Edited by EQ>IQ
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Marriage is a form of a contract. i suppose it's practical. it's a contract where two of us will come together and stay together for the rest of our lives. it's a contract where we become family. it's a contract where we make our beloved children.

 

Even though we aren't compatible in marriage, I still love you. You're talented and beautiful in all sorts of ways.

 

I will move on. I will find someone new. I will make my own family. I will still watch you from afar. Maybe we can talk again when we are graceful adults over some nice deserts?

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id do anything to just spend the night with you again........

 

especially tonight...

 

i wonder where you are what your doing who your with???

 

it hurts me so...

 

i thought if any day you would make contact it would be today, but still nothing...

 

i guess i really did mean nothing at all to you

 

i feel lost without you...

 

i love you so very much x

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I miss you so much, this still feels like a bad dream. You told your mum that you felt you couldn't give me what I wanted and that you didn't want to string me along... what did you think I wanted?! I was loving what we had, I didn't want the engagement or babies, I would have been fine if we'd never gone down that road I just wanted YOU and the life we had together. if there was anything I could say that could change how you feel I would do it in a heartbeat... I love you with all my heart and I just want us to get back together, we could start afresh... most people get a second chance and we are more than worth it. I miss you so much it hurts, please come back.

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I must be strong.

 

I'll get over you in time, I know it.

 

I feel so lonely now without you hanging out with me. But I felt lonely with you too... when you wouldn't hug me or hold me and when you were cold towards me... but I told you that you were cold, didn't I? I told you that you were stone cold. And I even went as far to say that you don't have a good heart. You disagreed. Well, dude, you didn't show me your good heart if you have one... you took my virginity and then you claimed that you didn't want to do it, well that's a load of B.S.... there were two of us in the room that night and you did what you wanted... Ok, I'm not going to complain about it, it is what it is.... I took a risk and without risk there is no reward right? I wanted to experience it and didn't want to wait for "the one"... I may never find "the one" but if I do, then the experience with you taught me one thing... what I can not tolerate.... I must be held and hugged and told often that I am loved and cared for... I'm not angry at you... I know you can't change your mind... you're somewhere feeling lonely just like me... I know you are alone because that's how you want to be... you said that you're selfish and don't want to share your life with anyone.... and even if you find a woman to have sex with, you'll still be alone, sex doesn't take away loneliness... and someday you will see that... now I remember something that you told me not long after we first met,... you told me that you were tired of sex-only relationships,... you either lied to me or you didn't know what you want... I believe that you don't know what you want... anyway, it's time to put away my memories of you... I'll think of you another day, I'm sure but when I do, you will be less important to me... still, knowing that my feelings will change and I'll be indifferent in time, still there is a small part of me that wishes to speak with you again down the road when I'm stronger and can resist any temptation I may feel to be with you again...... I thought about you today and felt a moment of attraction but the feeling didn't last... time to put away those memories. I will keep a few of the special ones locked away in my heart because I did feel an emotional connection to you.... it wasn't love... I'm not sure what you would call it... I enjoyed spending time with you... and that part I will miss.

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M,

we loved eachother so much we exhausted one another. You were so sweet to me and I was so sweet to you we had to be together all the time. For almost a year all we did was wake up together, spend the day together, and fall asleep in eachothers warmth, with few outside interruptions. A part of me will miss that so much, M, how tight we were. But when you told me that you couldn't wait to see me when I was all grown up it gave me hope, that I would be the first person you think of when you're ready for a girlfriend again, it helped me get through today. I really hope we can take this time to better ourselves.. We both need alot of help. We both have a long journey ahead of us and we cant put that away for eachother anymore. Remember that intervention episode where those two anorexic twins would ONLY wanna spend time with eachother, but at the same time they fought like cats and dogs... while STILL following eachother room to room, and clinging on to eachother? We laughed at their craziness, but thats us M. Remember how the twins went to seprate rehabs in the end? Thats what we gotta do. We have to find our own way and be healthy and happy, learn to always keep our friends close, before we can spend the rest of our lives together. I love you so much, really I always will. and I dont think anyone has ever loved me as much as you. Please find me again one day..

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Do you know how I am getting through each day without you?

 

I imagine that you're telling me to go my eat dinner like you used to do when we talked on the phone... remember how sometimes it would take me forever to get started on preping my dinner?

 

I imagine that you're telling me that it was getting late and time to hang up the phone.

 

I imagine you listening to how my day went.

 

I imagine you laughing at me because I have a cleaning lady and you telling me to clean my house. OMG. I imagine you saying OMG and laughing. You made me laugh and often.

 

I imagine how you get through your days alone. You go grocery shopping. You cook. You clean your house. You watch tv. You spend time with your dad.

 

I find it easier to get through my days keeping you in my thoughts. You are somewhere feeling lonely just like me. I hate feeling this way but in time it will pass. I will become indifferent and my feelings will change. I keep repeating that to myself over and over. And when I feel like crying, I cry. I don't stop myself. I let myself feel whatever I have to in order to just deal with it so I can move on. I don't second guess myself or wonder what if... the only thing that I would ask you now is this: won't you change your mind before my feelings change? I don't want to let you go. I want you to open your heart and share it with me. Please before my feelings change completely. Come to me. Hold me. Hug me. Don't let go. I won't turn you away. Make love to me. You won't meet someone like me ever. Please change your mind. Take me in your arms and don't ever let me go.

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