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Do you really think this is for the best?...

 

"it wasn't a decision I came to easily"...

 

Well, bully for you! Thanks a bunch for disregarding my feelings time and time again! I love you and I hate you at the same time. I absolutely hate this! Go away, out of my brain and stop interfering with my mood! I hope you really really miss me and what we had. I wonder if there is a heart deep down in you somewhere. GO AWAY!

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what the hell is wrong with you

why do u text me stupid questions once every blue moon as if im some kind of distant aquaintance?????????????????????????????????WE ARE NOT FRIENDS,OK? WE ARE NOT AQUIANTANCES!!! WE USED TO LIVE TOGETHER, GET THAT INTO YOUR HEAD AND RELAISE WHY ITS SO DISRESPECTFUL OF YOU TO BEHAVE LIKE WE WERE ONLY EVER FRIENDS!! YOU NEED A LESSON IN MANNERS

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I'm going out tonight dude. This will be my last post on E notalone

I realized, I am not gonna hang on anymore. I won't be reading your posts on the forums.

Also you owe me 1,500.00 you can keep making my car payment until May, or I will take you to small claims court. It's in the divorce paper work, which I am assuming you got along with the decree? Shut the phone off, I don't use it.

Bye bye.

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I want this day to be over, it's a bad and dark day today Some of the old feelings from early in the break-up are coming back to me, that you were too good for me, that I'll never fall in love as deeply again, that we were doomed from the start because you never really loved me like I loved you. I'm so sad and I have to pick myself up as I have visitors in about an hour and I just want to be on my own today.

 

I don't think you were too good for me, by the way. But I just feel like that again right now and I don't know why. I really tried my best

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tomorrow it will be a week today since the last contact with your sister. I think I am doing ok - I still miss you and think about you all the time, but I am taking this time to understand myself, to address my issues. Frankly, you were a waste of time, not really worth over 2 years. But if anything, you forced me to look inside myself, and this is good. I promise myself you will never have the opportunity of hearing from me again. This is the gift I give myself.

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I hate you for doing this to me. Have you got any idea how * * * * ed up my life is now?? Have you got any idea how much I gave up for you? I hate you i hate you i hate you for coming into my life and making me so happy then tearing it all away. You are so cruel and heartless.....I could never do this to someone. Did I mean nothing to you? Stop treating me like i'm nothing, like im dirt. I deserve answers and for you to be honest with me. Tell me I MEAN NOTHING TO YOU....you coward.

 

My heart is so beyond repair. I am over. Everything is over because of you. I wish to God I never met you. It just wasn't worth all this pain and suffering.

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Still trying to move on after all this time. Are you having fun with him? He's probably way cuter and funnier than I am, right? I really that someday you'll realize who you left behind. I gave you everything. I showered you with love and support. We have so many beautiful memories together, and you suddenly decided to leave me behind. How are you not affected by our break up? You went from loving me to being indifferent with me. It hurts so bad!

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I should have left you when you came back from Zante. You hurt me then and I never got over it. I never really forgave you, I just pretended because I thought I couldn't live without you. I shouldn't have given you the luxury of being able to walk away from me, I so wish I had walked away first. I swear if you hadn't kissed those girls we'd still be together. You cheated. You are a cheater. I deserve better than what you did to me. I'm gonna live my life and be so much better and happier than I ever would have been with you.

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I don't regret anything with you.

I don't regret our kisses, our sex, us hanging out and making memories. I don't regret any of that. I'm happy i met you.

When i started to date you, i realize how much i truly did not love my ex anymore, and all i wanted was to be your everything. All this love i had building inside of my heart, and nobody to give it to. I wanted it for you. And i did for short amount of time.

I really hope someday you can let go of your ex, or that she wokes up one day, and see's how much you really love her. How can she let go of a love like that? Somebody who was there for her through thick and thin, and yet... she left you. You can't accept that, and that's OKAY. I know how it feels. when somebody you cared for doesn't love you anymore. Believe me. I know the feeling too well... however, i won't stand around as you continue to chase her... making her feel... speical... it's a big no no for me.

And i will be setting myself up for heart break. So, no. I'm okay. I don't need you in my life. I don't need the drama. Sorry Jonathan.

 

Yet, i can't help but feel so... stupid. lol. thinking you truly care about me, while all this time... you really just wanted to be with her...

Lesson learned!

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OK, I got your message. You wanted me to check your facebook account that you rarely used, and see all your new female friends you added the last two days. And their comments of course "OMG, how did you find me after so many years", "Of course I remember you, how could I ever forget you?" etc. I think you are still confused, that's why you dupmed me. Do you think you are a teenager or something? Why are you acting so foolish and childish? That's not you.

I am not going to play any games, I can be a better player if I want to. But I don't want anything that has to do with you.

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Dear Ex!

 

I'm glad you left me! In the six weeks since you left I have been offered a fantastic promotion in the City, doubled my salary, lost a stone and a half and going on a fab holiday to Canada - leaving next week.

 

I hope you and your rebound are happy and the antibiotics are making you feel crap (Yes I DO know about that) Nae luck and screw you!!

 

 

After reading over many of these posts, I gotta say, this one STILL cracks me up!!!!! It feels so darned good to actually laugh!

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I really hate working with you, today I had a bad day.

 

My heart wants to reconcile with you, whilst my mind says.... run away fast!

 

Do you not realise that by calling me "Sweetheart, babe"... telling me you want to spend time with me, is complete torture for me???? You know that you aren't ready for any form of a relationship, so why not just leave me be? How can you not see your actions as being cruel?

 

Your so happy at work and I feel like * * * * all the time!

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Hahaha I know I said I wouldn't write you on here, but it sure beats drunk dialing, I am soooooooooooooooooooooo WASTED after one Long Island after the other

So my "date" took me out to dance..got me lots of drinks

I feel bad, I am totally not into him at all (blond/blue eyes, NOT my type!) It was hard for me cause I am not with him, to keep my eyes in my head, soooooooooo much eye candy OMG!!!!!!!!!

I bought this skin tight little shiny brown dress and brown stilettos for the occasion

SO OMG I missed dancing SO much. Of course, unfortunately I had to stay loyal to my "date" but he was an awful dancer, lol, and not hot to me AT ALL and what's worse he was all possessive and I was trying SO hard to be a good person haha but I prob failed.......I kept getting freaky with my butt towards him so I could check out the hot guys, and he was soooooooo hard hahahaha it totally turned me off cause I wasn't into him AT ALL. He makes A LOT of money and like, smells good/ dresses metro sexual etc SOOOOO GOOD to me but I AM NOT into blonds!!!!!

 

Anyway I know you prob never believed me, but of course I Turned down sex, he tried to get me to kiss him at the end of the night and kept trying to hold my hand, totally gross YUCK but I SAID NO I always say no! You were the only guy I said yes to...........................sigh.

 

So I was dancing my heart out tonight, and got the nastiest glares from some HOT women, OMG! These women were 10's!!!!!!!!!!! I could not believe it/ That was worth a hundred hot men checking me out! To know HOT WOMEN were insecure around me, I mean HOT HOT like 20 year olds with stunning bright blue eyes tiny size 0 bodies and tight, OMG and they were GLARING at me because I was dancing so fast and hard

It made me grin

 

The girls dancing on the bar, I was gonna go do it but didn't want my "date" to be offended

 

But anyway they looked so hot under the light but in the womens bathrooms they went in there and they were soooooooooooooooooo UGLY! I mean those girls were prob like 20 and looked incredible but in the bright bathroom they looked like nappy crack heads and all pale like albino...I could not believe they were the same "gorgeous stripper type girls" I had seen dancing on the bar tops!

Amazing what LIGHT can do hahhaaa

 

I had so much fun dancing my heart out. Seriously I was so happy dancing. It was so me, so my element. I was in my place, the dance floor

But my date kinda was grossing me out, and I feel bad because like I said this guy treated me like absolute GOLD he kept telling me I was more gorgeous than ANY woman there............................but I only like boys with brown hair and brown eyes! So I could not get into it at all

Like I said, when he got all hard cuz I was freak dancing, it totally grossed me out lol poor guy..YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

ANYWAY

 

The girls were so gorgeous tonight, they were so much fun to look at

I just could never understand why I can openly look at women and admire them and their fabulous beauty with ANY MAN BUT YOU! Soosoo frustrating!

I know you got mad at my jealousy. WHY OH WHY was I soooo jealous of you, I sure wish that I understood

When I am with other men, I am NEVER jealous!!!!!!!! They can look at other women and admire them, they can talk to them and flirt with them and I'd prob wanna watch them make out, but it was never like that with you M..............I feel like, if it was maybe you wouldn't of gotten so turned off by me.

I guess you were jealous too in a way, but didn't show it at the end

I was being loyal too, ya know.

I mean, when i was with you I NEVER looked or talked to dudes

 

But going out tonight there was sooo much guys and SOOO cute and I'd find myself locking eyes and I'd wink and flirt and dance and shake my booty and giggle for the attention then I'd look away and ignore em. I never did that when i was with you

 

One guy I wanted so bad to talk to but couldn't cuz I was with this gross dude UGH, I have too much respect and heart to do something sooo mean but he would not stop looking at me while I danced. He was your age and so cocky and confident..he seemed so chill I wanted to get to know him better

 

at the table drinking more, these two boys about 21 were totally just gawking at me and they were gorgeous, I couldn't believe these two boys 9 years younger were staring at me. I knew If I wasn't with this dude, they would have talked to me

I don't know, I find myself saying why not? why not talk to them- any age...why not? I mean, you would..................all you did was look at 19 year olds

And here I was always ignoring 21 year old boys because I was so loyal to a husband who didn't even DESIRE me

 

I like I said I wish I wasn't with the guy that took me. I am def gonna go out with the girls next time...

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An unregistered number sent me a text today and called me "love".

 

The moment I saw that word, for a split second I thought it was you because that's what we often called each other. My love. Your love. How could we go from that to the complete strangers we are trying to be now?

 

It wasn't you of course. Just a new, sweet friend sending me a text.

 

What I would give to hear you call me that again though.

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Carrie8484, I did the same thing. It's a bit worse. He just had to send me a blanco text message... just really nóthing in it at all. And I was upset about it for a week. I send a text message back asking why he send me an empty text message (an empty text is less than a breadcrumb right.. it's more like a grain of sand) Ofcourse he did not send me anything back. I bet it was just a game. Just checking if I would reply.

Sometimes they can be really.... I can't find the words for such stupid actions really.

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Anyone here do this?

The ex texts you, it's a breadcrumb, it may or may not ask a question, you know you shouldn't reply, but you do eventually because you're thinking if they wanna ask you back they need to open up two way communication, right??

But everytime, after you reply, the ex checks out, disappears, or just replies in a bland, meaningless way.

When does the ''cycle'' of texting back stop, how do you know it's truly time for solid, solid NC because there is just NO WAY they are coming back??

I'm one of those people who needs to take it to the extreme before I give up, so Im forced to give up hope of a recon.

I've not begged or pleaded since the beginning of August, Ive been cool, calm (mostly) since then

but I still respond to 50% of his breadcrumbs. I get a text every 1-2 weeks. Each time he texts me, I think ''what if It means he's changing his mind??'' but it never does. (I dont ask him, but he always cuts the convo short after 2 texts).

I have periods of NC where I feel ok, like im moving on, then PING my phone will go off and it's him. Im set back another step.

can anyone relate?

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Our house is now legally sold and I will be moving out in 3 weeks time. I can't believe how much things can change in the space of 24hrs. I really had resigned myself to the idea that I'd still be in the house over Christmas, but I'm glad that's not going to be the case.

 

I'm glad that it's all going to be sorted soon, but it makes me kind of sad too. This was our home together and we OWNED it. We were so lucky to be able to own a house and we've been very lucky to sell it so easily. I am so grateful for that, but now it's really coming to an end. I've wanted to be able to draw a line under everything and after this there will be no need for us to speak, but I find it hard to believe we'll never speak again. I kind of hope that somewhere down the line we'll be able to talk, but who knows if that's going to be possible. Time will tell.

 

The end is near.

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