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Post here instead of contacting your ex!


Nynnja
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hey, wanna hear a funny joke?

 

 

YOU! hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha. stupid stupid girl.

 

at first i was just ignoring you because you seem to think its okay to talk to me whenever you feel like it - but now im ignoring you because you suck.

yeah, that's right. you suck.

 

boom.

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I regret letting you into my heart again. DAMN IT!!!!!!! I don't understand why you went cold again, WHY are you playing these games with my heart? WHY am I letting you??? Getting over you was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life, doing this again.....IDK how to handle it! Why are you cold again, acting like you weren't all on me the past week? You don't get to just decide when you can come and go in my life!!! You don't get to just come back after almost a year and tell me you missed me and ALL this stuff- how you are attracted to me, bring up old memories, kiss me and act touchy feely with me and make me FEEL FOR YOU AGAIN and then BAM go away again!!! How is that fair????? ITS NOT!!!

 

 

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I just want someone to tell me that this isn't real, that there is something very wrong with this situation. I want her to not actually love you. I want you to realize she's not everything you ever wanted and leave her. I want all of your problems to catch up with you. I want this nightmare to stop.

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It doesn’t matter how good my day is or what I do or how much fun I have. At the end of the day when I come home I always think about you.

 

I still love you...somewhat. I’m not really sure what I feel for you. I just know that I want you back with me to be able to hold you and kiss you again. And knowing that you feel nothing for me and that you are back with her really hurts me a lot.

 

I wish you were normal. You yourself know that you are not. I wish you would think and feel like a normal man and come back to me. A part of me would trade all these new friends and hobbies that I have in a heartbeat to have you back with me. I would do anything for you. I promise I would make you happy. Unlike you, I would be faithful to you for the rest of my life.

 

It’s absurd how I became so attached to you in a matter of months, and how I want you back despite knowing what kind of man you are. I can’t even be attracted to other men. It would feel weird to hug or kiss someone else. Somehow I feel that no one can compare to you (…). But I know that if I got back with you I would only be setting myself up for failure. Any woman that happens to fall in love with you is destined to be hurt, lied to, and get cheated on.

 

I’m still in a dilemma trying to decide if I should acknowledge you or just ignore you if I bump into you. I know if I ignore you we might never speak again. But if I don’t and you are the one who ignores me it will hurt like crazy, and I don’t want to give you another opportunity to make me suffer.

 

I know I have to let this go.

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you were never an idiot when we were together, so why are you acting like the biggest tool now? you send me a text after 1 week NC, I respond because I'm weak...and hey presto I get nothing back. It's my fault for replying, but you should be wanting me to heal, you said you wanted me to be happy. If we are never going to get back together, the only way I can find happiness is if you leave me alone. How many times have I told you that? every drip of pathetic contact reminds me of how you REJECTED me, ABANDONED me, LOST YOUR ATTRACTION to me, FELL OUT OF LOVE WITH ME and KICKED ME WHEN I WAS DOWN

 

really?

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Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah i still love you blah blah blah blah blah blah blah but you kinda suck blah blah blah blah blah blah blah could forget you blah blah blah blah blah blah blah miss me? Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah oh well blah blah blah blah blah take care blah blah blah.

 

Blah.

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Day 4 of BU and NC,

 

what I feel: I'm still in shock that after 4 perfect years you suddenly made the decision to be alone. I have a deadline on Friday for my assignment in my postgraduate studies and I haven't even opened the books. I cannot concentrate, I went out with my best friend this weekend, I went with my mum to have a coffee, we talked about you trying to find out what really happened. My mum told me this morning that she had a good dream about me this night, I don't believe in these things but it made me feel better! I'm going to meet a friend in the afternoon, I hope it'll make me fell better, too... I feel lost. I suppose you are happy with your decision. You sain you want to be alone and miserable in order to solve the problems in your life. I am scared that I may meet you accidentally and you would be with another girl and all these were lies... I am not contacting you yet, I am not ready, but I don't want more than 10 days of NC to pass.

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oh dear, two emails of useless spineless contact. not even a mention of my birthday jus passed

 

what do you want? jeez....

 

i know you havent changed or grown - so why would i want to engage with a 34yo manboy?

 

ok gotta go...busy...and i got college in abit...

 

you go back to your lil haerem...

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UGH....I was doing good then you have to text me that you miss me. So you miss me? Of course you miss me but keep it to yourself and let me move on. You got back with your exgirlfreind....you made that choice and you deserve to miss me. I am trying to heal and hearing that just made thoughts of you creep into my head.... * * * * you for telling me that!

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Listening to "I love the way you lie" by Eminem...

 

I kept dreaming about you last night again but this is the first morning where I felt pretty good...

I kept thinking about all the times in the past 4 years you were never there for me. Holiday's you would bail out...work or stay at home...never go with me...

to zoo's, family functions...water parks...skating/bowling/ other activities...whenever I'd ask you to take a day off work to spend time with me you said no. But when we would break off you would take days off at a time to go out with your guy friends and do stuff. I didn't matter to you.

I wish I could stop living in my head....

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I feel so good again today. It's like it finally clicked in my brain, how bad you treated me, how you were never invested or committed, it's like it just clicked in my head that.. you do NOT deserve me. Just yesterday I walked into a store to buy something, and left with a number instead of what I went there for lol. She was cute and very nice. She would probably treat me so much better than you did, maybe I would make her TOP 10 PRIORITY LIST. I obviously didnt on yours.

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A SONG TO HELP

 

Rascal flatts-easy.

 

Its a little sad.. BUT.. there are some lyrics that I LOVE..

 

"We broke up

yeah, it's tough

most guys would've been crushed

Wastin' their time

Wonderin' where they went wrong

No way, not me

Hey, I'm doing just fine

I'm not afraid of movin' on"

 

It helped me.. figured it might help someone else too

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Wow.................OK so what gives today. All of the sudden you're purging me even MORE out of your life? it wasn't enough for you to change your phone number, destroy every photo we ever had or anything we created together any memories at all you destroyed them all WHILE we were together

So now I go check on your boards that you post on with your friends, I always liked to see that you're ALIVE anyway.........................................but lo and behold you deleted one of your handles!

The crazy thing is, I already have your new number unbeknownst to you. You're a complete idiot, my cars in your name and you're gonna change ur number? Okkkk guess I gotta hire a lawyer GREAT, it wasn't enough that you destroyed everything I owned made me give you the last money I had AND I had to pay for the divorce

What gives. Did you see my call log? Good I hope so I hope it pisses you off that little weak me, the little me who you pushed around for 4 years and bullied is talking to someone else! I may love you, I DONT need you.

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I am okay.

Yeah I am broken again.

But i'll get some glue and repair myself up again.

It's not that hard now... i did do it before....

I am going to cry, i am going to scream, i am not holding back.

Yes, I care about you still... but how can we work it out? You broke my trust.

I can't give you my trust...

You told her some much emotional crap...............

I tell you EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING.

And you couldn't tell me how you are feeling?

Nooo, instead you go to your ex because she feels safe... lol...

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Hey, how are you? How are the guys? I am doing ok, and getting more clarity about us. I am not really mad at you anymore, just sad and still adjusting. You are like a stranger to me now. I wish we could talk and I could tell you what I learned about us but you dont want to talk to me. I guess you are just worried you will get sucked back in. Thats ok. I wish we could have done some counseling and maybe this wouldnt have happened. But what is, is... Love u

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Hey darlin..I hope you're ok. I'm much better. Feeling like part of the old me is still here, and resurfacing again. I have a few more good weekends lined up. I wish I could tell you all the stuff that's happened and tell you about my plans. Mostly, I've been ok. But every now and then I think about you doing that stupid dance you used to do before...you know, and that sad face that I loved, how you look when you just step out of the shower, how you used to nuzzle me and say we were like simba and nala. And how you pulled me into your nook in the middle of the night...and when I think of those things it hurts and the tears come again. It's silly really all such trivial things that can't build a lasting relationship, but made us so happy. I need to miss those times to get rid of the sadness deep inside.

 

I know it's wrong of me, but I hope you miss me too. I know we can't ever work, but we were good together. You taught me so much and I thank you for that. This is making me stronger. I'll never stop loving you my little *** *****. I love you.

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