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Post here instead of contacting your ex!


Nynnja
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You are heartless, careless.

 

You trashed my parents for not giving me handouts.

 

What morals have your parents instilled in you? Do you realise what you have done to the person who truly loved and cared for your well-being? I hate you for contacting me, I was doing fine without your * * * * * ass!

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I resent you for not telling me how you really felt, choosing instead to detach yourself emotionally. But even more I resent myself for not telling you how I felt and causing you to do that.

 

I think you're an idiot for jumping ship to a guy you must know isn't going to treat you well in the long term. But if he does, I will be glad - I want your happiness.

 

You have actually taught me what it feels like to be in love. Despite how * * * * I feel now, thank you! But... I am scared I won't ever feel this strongly for anyone else.

 

I miss having sex with you. It was the best thing I have experienced in my life.

 

I want you back so much. I don't want to let go of wanting you in case you ever do decide to come back.

 

I want to know if you still think about me, or whether being with him is making you forget.

 

Did you ever really love me? Why didn't you tell me? Was it just because you thought I would leave you?

 

How long ago did you start sleeping with him?

 

Why did you delete me on Facebook? To get over me? To protect me? Because he told you to?

 

(Just some of the questions!)

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OK, new day, new start.

 

I'm sat drinking coffee and waiting for a phone call about my new job, I might even have my induction today but just waiting to hear back from the lady. You bought me a card congratulating me when I got the placement 4 months ago. I think I know where it is but I haven't gone looking for it.

 

I'm moving on slowly I suppose. I'll get there. Right now I'm not sure where I want you to be in my life. You have hurt me and you continue to hurt me, although I don't think you realise that. So from today again you do not exist. Until you contact me again you are invisible to me.

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Dear X,

 

Please ignore previous emails. I'm happy, everything's perfectly fine here, except that I've still got crazy love goggles on!

 

I'm still getting used to not sharing things with you. So nothing's changed. Let's not do this any more. Call me if ever you want to plan our wedding day at [place we talked about] Ha ha! ;-)

 

Take care, be happy!

 

DD

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Day 67

 

I feel a little guilty today. It dawned on me yesterday that you're quite possibly very sad. Not just because you're graduating, but because you're moving back to your home country in December, and you want to talk to me. Since I started NC, that's never happened.

 

I'm put in an awkward place. Should I break NC, to talk to you one last time before you go back home overseas, or keep going indefinitely? I'm going with the first one right now.

 

But I want to hold off as long as possible before I do.

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hey you--you know what's promising? I feel almost nothing when I see a picture of you now. you have no idea how much work it took to get to that point. I never thought I'd see you as anything less than the man of my dreams and now you're not that attractive to me. I see you and I see your immaturity, boorishness, and your lies as well as your big brown eyes and it helps so much. I feel good enough for you now--and I don't need to have you--not at all after what you put me through.

 

I've accepted that we won't be friends. I'm thisclose to not looking back

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on second thought, should I just get it over with already? I feel totally lame breaking up with you in my head when you're the one who dumped me ages ago. Oh well--it's come to that hasn't it? Bye--it's really over and I'm never coming back ______.

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So this is really it. Well, at least we finally both agree on something - that our relationship is non-existant. You know what's funny....I'm always attributing emotions or thoughts to you that I don't think you're even feeling. Here I was, feeling somber and regretful because I really hate to be on bad terms with anyone..as well as hating to feel as if I failed at something i put so much effort towards...but when I looked at your page, you seem just fine and dandy. Really, I think it will be much harder for me to move on from this than it will be for you. There is so much I've gone through over the past eight years that you never knew about or seemed to notice. I don't know why I'm feeling sorry for you, when you did so much to hurt me, yet spun it back at me like I'm the reason you did such things. Gah, I never thought I'd get around someone who was so much like my dad. This was the main reason I left, too. I couldn't stand the thought of us becoming my parents (or yours!) and as horrible as things already were with just us, thank heavens we never had kids, though you said before it was your intention to trap me so I couldn't leave (who says stuff like that??). I hate it when I miss the fantasy you, because I know that's not the real you. I feel somewhat psycho myself in that way.. *sigh*. Anyway, wow.. I'm free, really really free. I know inside it is a good thing, yet, I feel nearly as empty as this room I'm sitting in right now...

 

By the way, thanks for not talking to me when I was on messenger. No, I mean it! If you would have talked to me, I would have talked to you and either we'd go back to square one, or it'd be another horrible experience of accusation-flinging and arguing. I hate having the bad memories I have, I don't need to acquire more, especially when I feel hurt right now. I'm glad you didn't talk to me. I'm even gladder that I saw your new status. Making it official in itself is enough of a closure for me. Now that the door is closed, I won't keep banging into it as I'm fumbling around in this dark confusion of what direction I should start going with my life. I won't worry about you anymore; you have a lot of support and will be just fine. It's myself that I need to look after.

Edited by Yoruame
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I have been missing you a lot lately. I'm so stupid I even told you, but of course you ignored me.. It's time. I can feel myself letting go but this time it's different ben, I'm going to expell you no matter what. Even if you begged me back I will be armed to say no this time. No matter what, I'm done being a pawnZ it's bittersweet, all hope is dying. But you did this. Not me. Goodbye old lover.

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The auto-respond message I drafted and set up yesterday before I broke NC with a couple of silly emails this morning:

 

 

 

Needless to say I won't be setting up an auto-respond message. I will deal with any message she sends me on its own merits and after consulting with the good folks on eNA who have been following my thread.

 

DD

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How can you forget so easily? How is it possible that you don't miss me or care about me at all? I just don't understand. You're positively sadistic. It isn't fair that you're so happy while I'm suffering like this. What happened to karma? What happened to "what goes around comes around?" What happened to actions having consequences? I feel like a little kid for thinking this, but it just isn't fair.

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Although i love you so much and i miss our time together...the sad thing is that i can't trust your judgement anymore...perhaps you are still too young...so, even if you will want someday to come back, please forgive me but i'll say no. I have to, even if it's killing me to think about it. I can't let you break my heart again. I'm so sorry about us.

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Scuds- so sorry I sent that last email to you. I just was so hurt, my pride was so hurt and my ego too. I too will always be there for you. I love you so much and miss you more. How are you? How is your cough? are you finally 100% better? How is it working nights? How are the guys?

 

I hate that we are broken up like this. I thought we were going to make it. You were good to me in so many ways. I only hope you feel I was good to you too. I tried the best I could. Helping you with Pete was a total show of my love for you. I would do it again in a heartbeat. If only, if only.

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