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I broke NC but feel good


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Almost five month ago my ex left me for another woman (he was very confused then but I pushed him to make the decision) and since then he never initiated any contact. I was on NC for two months but broke NC, sent some hostile stuff and never got any responses. Then resumed NC for a month, tested waters again, no response. NC again. Tried to date, but nobody could even compare with him. I know that I love him and will always do. Every day I miss him like crazy so today I decided to sent him the following text message calmly:

 

"Hi...still miss you like crazy...does that mean you won't be back with me...does that mean we won't talk to each other forever? It's been really hard for me to deal with this...But whatever decisions you make I'll be happy for you as long as you are happy. I deleted your folks from FB coz it's too painful to be reminded. Best - love and always"

 

He responded and it was the longest ever since the breakup because he used the silent treatment to me:

 

"Hi...hope you are enjoying your new home and work is well with you. All is well here. Take care, S"

 

I responded:

 

"Everything is well except having difficulty letting go. But I'll be fine because I'm so busy...glad to hear from you."

 

I don't expect any responses and he didn't respond either.

 

I feel like that I put a closure on this relationship, no matter how much I want him back. But I decide to truly move on and learn to love again. Maybe tomorrow I'll feel bad but it gave me some relief to let him know that I don't hate him...any opinions? Have I just done something stupid?

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Don't beat yourself up. There isn't any shame in reaching out to someone you love. I know everyone on here is trying their best to strategize a reconciliation, but really, we're all just stumbling around in the dark. There is no ONE major formula for success. Every relationship is unique. Sure, there are some things that are helpful, but no one is capable of predicting what unique factors are necessary to bring any particular couple back together, or drive them apart for good. If we had that magic ball that allowed us to see into the future, we'd all be using it rather than posting here!!!!!!!

 

If you feel bad about reaching out just remind yourself that you just did it because you loved him (and he iced you out with the silent treatment).

 

I doubt that a year from now you will regret your decision. Sometimes it helps to look at things in a larger perspective.

 

I'm sorry things haven't worked out-- my ex hasn't been totally silent, but close to it...I understand how horrible that is to deal with.

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Thanks TG!! I don't regret each reach-out that I made because they're necessary steps for me to know his stance so that I can adjust my strategies. I want him back but when I tested waters and found he's not interested I move one step forward. I'll always love him and still believe we're meant to be together. Nobody knows about the future though. So just try to live to the moment. By the way never thought that I would be healing to this point!!!One month ago I was still acting hysterical but now I'm calm and here he responded! How's everything with you? I haven't been here for a while.

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