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Bullys next door terrorizing my 7year old Son/response last night from Mom


ladyjp

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The original post is at the bottom of the page. THIS IS CURRENT EVENTS:

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. Should I not go back to my home and area and subdivision my Son and I adore over these people?

I have gotten great response from so many people but I think based on recent events the survielance cameras may be what has to happen. After yesterday's responses I thought I would give it the good ole college try ONE MORE TIME with these people and ask to work towards a solution but letting them know this time, more aggressively, that I am not going to tolerate it this time when we move back .

I reached out to the Mom via e-mail and her response was not only alarming but so disheartening I could not hardly vision living there again.

 

She told me that because my Son aggravates her kids that is where there anger to my Son comes from and that he is always starting something with her boys( 11 and 9). SHe then went a step further to say last year when her kids were bullying my Son and Physical abuse got involved that the physical abuse "wasn't that bad and not a big deal cause noone got hurt". She said I need to punish my son for trying to start something.She denied all the harassment I have endured and said that she thinks She said the damage is done and it can't be reversed and that she doesn't want to get an email or call from me about this anymore. She said I have exaggerated bullying and physical abuse and it is not that big of a deal.

The survelience cameras would be a must since she believes that physical abuse is "okay" if noone is hurt. Wow. At this point I am not sure It is healthy to even go back there at all. I am heartbroken as my Son cannot wait to get back to his old school and friends

__________________

 

 

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ORIGINAL POST

We lived in Edwardsville, IL in a wonderful subdivision. Full of children on a huge culdesac. I am a single Mom with an only child , a boy of 7 years old.

We moved out of our home 5 months ago due to family reasons and had to go to St. Charles, MO for a few months. We are moving back into our home October 1st and My Son could not be happier to be back in his old school with his friends. Only one problem- the kids next door that moved in 2 years ago are horrible and have bullied my Son for the past two years.

 

Over the past 2 years I have endured the people's 3 boys, ages 11,9,and 4 terrorizing my Son. They drop the F bomb on every sentence, hit my Son, call him names, gang up on him when he is riding his bicycle in the culdesac and try to knock him down, and try to get other children to join the club in harassing him. I , last year, talked to the parents and they were very aggressive and told me if my Son smarted off to their boys then he deserved what he got. We live in a subdivision of $350,000.00 dollar homes and not in a low income part of town where parents may not have time to get involved. I was mortified. I tried talking to them many times and always the same story. An excuse or trying to place blame on others. They would become very defensive and say well your kid..........

 

One day I came out and the 11 year old had my Son in a headlock and was hitting him in the face. The Dad told me I was overreacting when I tried to get them to take action.

 

Since deciding to go back in October I have called the Mom and asked if we could meet for lunch and try to come up with a plan so this doesn't happen again when we move back in. She said " well we are not optimistic and if you come back we can maybe talk then". Once again, no action taken.

 

We were over at our house 2 days ago and the boys started right away calling my Son names, shoving him, and telling him to get the F off their yard.

 

I am lost. What should I do? I can't base where my Son and I will live on a bad neighbor but am terrified of what is going to happen when we go back. Should I reach out to her again and let her know I am not going to tolerate this? Should I tell her what happened 2 days ago when we were there ( not that she would care)? My Son is thrilled to go back to his old school and be with the other friends he has in the subdivision but I am scared to death and questioning if I am making the right choice by returning.

 

The school is wonderful. It is a beautiful area and we have a lovely home. My Son loves it there.

 

Has anyone dealt with this and has any ideas?

__________________

 

jp

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Get a lawyer - file a police report, and seek professional advice.

 

No one can advise you to move/ re-locate. What I would say is stop contacting this family, they don't have any interpersonal skills and this is why their kids have turned into little horrors.

 

Have a neighbourhood watch meeting. Don't invite the bullies. Don't start pointing the finger and start throwing accusations, but address the issue you are having regarding child safety in your street. I guarantee, people will speak up and start naming names!

 

Strength in numbers. If people want their children to be safe whilst playing out in the street, then why not involve them more in kids activities? Set a curfew, and make sure that there is an adult out in the front garden during that time keeping an eye on things for a couple of weeks. If there is any trouble then there are your witnesses. The more you communicate and are active with your neighbours, the more isolated the bullies will become, until eventually they will be the ones forced out!

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I agree with the above, except I think the lawyer part is premature.

 

If these people can't be neighborly, then neither can you or the rest of your neighbors. I think you should go to the police station with all of your communication documented or printed out, and file a police report. Let the police know you want to start a neighborhood watch, and get their advice for that. Then, go door-to-door asking your neighbors to join in- and I think you should include your nasty neighbors.

 

If they perceive a real and legal threat (a neighborhood watch concentrating on bullying among other things), things might change, and if they don't, you've taken all the steps to make sure that if anything does happen again, your son is protected.

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