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This seems like a really shallow and stupid thing, but I'm starting to get concerned about the psychological ramifications of getting older and losing my looks.

 

I wouldn't consider myself to be superficial, and know I have more going for me than my appearance, but I've always been attractive and have been judged by the way I look throughout my life. It's really awkward to type about this, because it all sounds so egotistical and vapid, but it's the honest situation and my intention is not to toot my own horn. My looks have always been the first and only thing people seem to notice, and is something that has been brought to my attention by the majority of people I come in contact with. My looks were what got me guys, money, respect, attention, and a lot of advantages in life. Now that I'm starting to get older, I know this isn't going to last much longer. Already my metabolism is slowing down and I'm starting to get lines around my eyes, and I feel like I should start mentally preparing myself for the inevitable. I don't want to be one of those women who's unable to let go of her beauty and ends up getting a ton of plastic surgery, or one of those formerly beautiful women who gets depressed and doesn't know how to handle life as an average-looking person. Basically, I don't want looks to define me or mean that much to me, but they mean so much to everyone else and have contributed so much to my life being what it is that it's hard to separate myself from that. I know I didn't start out like this, but after so many years of living it, the way you look kind of becomes ingrained as a part of your identity. I've always been defined as "the hot chick" or "the pretty girl" or something to that effect, and I feel that once I lose my looks my life could be very different.

 

How do I deal with this?

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I guess for me i can see how at first it might be a panic moment for you because of having to deal with changes. Its just hopefully with time and understanding you can cope with whatever your going thru. I guess for me personally ive never tried to be one of those people that put so much emphasis on how i look or caring so much about how someone looks. I guess its kinda weird as well because i care about it but i dont only care about looks with women. I think learning to deal with it will all come down to the attitude you have when dealing with it. I also wonder if its somewhat feeling like no one will treat you the same because of your looks being different. Im not going to sugar coat it and say it will be the same because honestly it might change with some people. Its just as long as you have people who it wont really change anything then i dont see it being a problem. I guess little by little like you writing this post that youll do your best to deal with it.

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I had to make peace with getting older. It wasn't all that easy. Now I am in a pretty good place where I wouldn't trade anything with a younger person. I accept that my body and mind are aging and I plan to extend my active years as long as I can by taking excellent care of myself. When I look in the mirror I see a happy, vital, extraordinarily capable woman and I will be that hopefully for a long, long time. I do plan to age, as gracefully as possible.

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Now I am in a pretty good place where I wouldn't trade anything with a younger person.

When I look in the mirror I see a happy, vital, extraordinarily capable woman and I will be that hopefully for a long, long time.

DITTO! Ageing never scared me and in fact, getting older just gets better and better. As for looks - my husband reckons I get hotter the older I get, lol. I wouldn't trade places with a younger person either. I'm in a far far happier place than I've ever been.

 

Older doesn't mean uglier. Older means more vibrant, secure, and content, which in turn makes for way better looking imo.

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Who says you have to get ugly with age. Keep eating right and taking care of yourself. Exercise. Consume foods with lycopene in them. And most importantly, try to be as stress free as possible.

 

My mom turned 60 this year and has been hit on by younger men for as long as I can remember.

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I think people who are extraordinarily good-looking in their younger years are still extraordinarily good-looking in their older years.

Let's take this example.....let's say I'm average and my friend is the "hot chick". Well, with some wrinkles, having children, grey hair.....I'm assuming she'd still be hotter than her peers by comparison because she started out thin with nicer skin, hair, symetric eyes or whatever else makes someone hot.

None of this particularly matters in making you a quality person, but if you're concerned about how your looks will compare to others....your peers are going to age as well and you will still be compared to your peers....not to 20 year olds. Therefore you'll still be the "hot chick"

All of that was supposed to make you feel better but I'm not sure I did a good job

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