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I don't want to tell guys I'm unemployed...so I don't.


CoCo2009
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i would just tell the truth if they ask. i mean, the entire country is having troubles with employment, so i don't see anything wrong with saying that you used to work in xxxxx but are now actively searching for a new job. or, if you want to be more vague, just tell them that your field is marketing, but you'd rather spend the date talking about fun stuff, instead of work.

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Tell him the truth immediately.

You must fess up or he may end up having trust issues with you.

 

Are you looking for a job?

Are you interested in looking for a job?

 

Do you have aspirations in what you want to do and are looking for ways to get into what you want to do?

 

If there is one thing which impresses me, it's people who have dreams and plan on achieveing those goals.

 

Some things which will work in your favour to tell him if they are true.

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I know what you mean!

 

I've recently finished university and I'm unemployed. I am looking for a job but there's hardly anything about at the moment - either in the industry I want to work in or otherwise! I feel like such a failure. I know it's not uncommon in the current climate but I feel so worthless.

 

I actually think it was one of the reasons why the girl I was dating was put off by me. Not having a job means you tend to have nothing to really talk about. Sure, you have free time to do things but if you have no money, all you can really do is stay at home. I can't remember where I read it but somebody once said "if you are bored, chances are you're boring" and I reckon that's why I got dumped.

 

I didn't want to tell her I didn't have a job either because I felt ashamed. It's not my fault but I didn't want her to think I was lazy and just couldn't be bothered to work. It was embarrassing.

 

That said, I did tell her but I kind of felt like that lost me a few points.

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i cannot date a girl without a job unless she was a student in college working towards something. i just cannot do no job, no school, etc. another is no car. uhh i hate that. that's like the worst.

 

but i always ask a girl, 'so what do you do?'

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You have to imagine if a guy you were talking to suddenly disclosed something that he didn't want to tell you earlier, so he lied about....how would you feel?

You should definitely tell the truth and not be dishonest about your situation again. If a guy told me, "I didn't want you to know, so I didn't tell you" or "It's just so embarassing that I lied", then I'd wonder about his general character.

That's not to say I think you have ANYTHING wrong with your character....I do not think that....it's just that people who are just dating for the first time are looking out to protect their hearts and are looking for the "red flags".

Better to be honest.

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i cannot date a girl without a job unless she was a student in college working towards something. i just cannot do no job, no school, etc. another is no car. uhh i hate that. that's like the worst.

 

but i always ask a girl, 'so what do you do?'

 

Well thats good for you. thanks for sharing i guess? lol

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Not being sarcastic. I didn't really ask you that actually, I asked if I should just tell the truth. Its only been a week but I shouldn't lie anyway...whats the point. I think I should, if he doesn't like me after all oh well its not the end of the world after all. I just wish I could find a job....I hate being unemployed.

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I agree with the others that you should be honest. It is a really tough economy and everyone knows jobs are hard to find right now. Just try to sound as confident as you can about it and be clear that you have other hobbies/interests and are not just sitting around the house watching TV all day. Most guys will understand temporary unemployment as long as you clearly do have dreams and aspirations that you're passionate about.

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I have to disagree.. even when I have only been employed part-time, people who have full-time jobs will sit in judgement of me cuz I did not have a FT job!

 

Just cuz the economy is bad, does not mean that EVERYONE is going to be sympathetic to your plight.

 

LIke the poster ghost said.. he WANTS his SO to have a job.. there are others like that... and really it is YOUR business, not anyone else;s.....

Tell them you are in independent contractor if you must... they can work whatever hours they like...

 

Even employers who KNOW you have NO OTHER JOB have no qualms lately about giving you just 8-10 hours per WEEK!

 

Not everyone in the world is nice, if you feel ashamed about it, then do not reveal it.

 

They do not have to know everythign about you, besides you have only known the guy a short time, anyway.

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Not everyone in the world is nice, if you feel ashamed about it, then do not reveal it.

 

But...why would you want to date the guys who aren't nice? If you have to lie about crucial aspects of your life to get the guy to be interested in you, he's not the right guy for you. Period.

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Is this bad? I just don't want to tell them I'm not working right now..I don't feel like going there. Am I wrong?

 

From a guys perspective - honesty goes a long way. If your "guy" runs away just because you are unemployed - well doesnt that say a lot about him?

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