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for people who were following me.. my kind of bf just messaged me doesn't want to be a couple


Belgian girl

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He messaged We are both having (the same) (psychical) problems, us together makes it worse. Let's stay friends w/out having sex. Having sex w/ you is too much asked for me. We should both become strong ourselves.

 

How about..."Becoming strong together, and sexually also."

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I personally feel he is right in his assessment. It isn't easy to hear and it doesn't make it any less painful, but you are not in a mental state to be in a relationship. You guys cannot use each other as support when neither of you are in a healthy place. You need to seek help independent of him and get yourself sorted out and healthy. And from the sounds of it, so does he.

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I personally feel he is right in his assessment. It isn't easy to hear and it doesn't make it any less painful, but you are not in a mental state to be in a relationship. You guys cannot use each other as support when neither of you are in a healthy place. You need to seek help independent of him and get yourself sorted out and healthy. And from the sounds of it, so does he.

 

then still it won't be a valuable reason for me to exclude someone for being a potential partner.

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I am sorry you're going through this. I understand it's painful and that you don't see his reason for breaking things off as being a valid one. I felt the same way about my ex-boyfriend as well -- that his reasons for ending things were not good ones; I was frustrated, hurt, and puzzled.

 

I think, though, that with everything you're going through (health-wise, etc.) that it might actually be better if you and he backed away from a romantic relationship for awhile. When both people in a relationship are going through personal issues, it makes it much harder to make the relationship work in a healthy way. Maybe in the future the two of you can work things out.

 

Again, I am sorry you're feeling badly. Do you think that you can consider being his friend sometime in the future?

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How to leave an abusive relationshi...
How to leave an abusive relationship and why it's so hard

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