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ACarrington
We visited the Cemetery with my Shi...
We visited the Cemetery with my Shih Tzu puppies, and something weird happened...

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I decided a while ago that I was not going to contact my ex for a very long time. I maintained that goal since June 22nd... well my dog passed away this morning and she and I shared a sad moment together when her dog passed away so it reminded me of her and I wanted to say hi and tell her this. I told her that I still think about her etc. I said "Maybe you still think about me too-- I hope you do". The rest of the email was just normal friendly stuff, hope all is well, I'm seeing somebody new, just wanting to say hi and update, etc.

 

In her reply email she told me about how well things are going with this guy she's seeing and just general stuff about life. She also wrote "Yes, I think about you a lot. Probably too much." And at the end of the email-- "Ahhhhh if only the circumstances were a little different between you and me. Because i do... still ...and always will think about you and all the great times."

 

She is seeing the same guy she basically left me for. I think she is very happy and in love with him-- I just find it kinda bitter sweet and interesting that despite this, she says she still thinks about me "a lot" and thinks "if only" about our situation...

 

I guess love isnt black and white. I just think its interesting that she is in love with someone, yet seems to hold strong feelings for me still. I know she does not want to get back together though.

 

There isnt really a question in this I just wanted to share, rant, rave a little... Any thoughts would be appreciated but I understand if there isnt much to comment on!

 

Thank you!

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I just recently started seeing this new person. We've been on like... 4 dates.

 

My ex and I ended very amicably. We both said we still love each other etc. I will always care about her and I think she feels the same.

 

I guess no one agrees-- I just find it unusual that you could be in love with someone else but still have strong feelings for someone you broke up with.

 

Sorry for writing a dumb post!

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its not a dumb post.

 

yes you made a mistake by contacting your ex. in all honesty i don't think she is thinking about you. all that she can thhink of is her new man. i am in your shoes at the moment. we've had similar experiences. my ex has contacted me twice and i responded to both of them with polite, positive dead end replies. i miss her, but getting rid of her was for the best.

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I just recently started seeing this new person. We've been on like... 4 dates.

 

My ex and I ended very amicably. We both said we still love each other etc. I will always care about her and I think she feels the same.

 

I guess no one agrees-- I just find it unusual that you could be in love with someone else but still have strong feelings for someone you broke up with.

 

Sorry for writing a dumb post!

 

It wasn't a dumb post. I totally get where you are coming from. It is nice to know that they still think about you. I don't know much about your situation, but it looks as though you are moving on, so I think what you did was fine. I had an amicable split from my ex as well. So we are still in touch, I called him when my grandfather died and my mother was in the hospital - he was with me for 5 years and it was nice that I could turn to him for a bit of consolation. Not to long ago I (stupidly) told him I missed him - and I felt SO dumb for doing that. He told me he missed me too. That was all I needed to hear. We are not getting back together, and there is no desire for reconcilliation, I just needed to know that I haven't been erased from his life (because he will never be erased from mine).

 

And you are right, love isn't black and white. We can love on so many different levels, the love she (still) has for you is probably very different than the love she once had for you. And that is probably different than the love she currently has for the new boyfriend. Love is complex (and that is what makes it so hard).

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