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Break ups - Do you ever see it coming?


Wonderlust

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I have always seen my break-ups coming (or "felt" them coming). I think most people can at least see in hindsight that things weren't right. Unfortunately, then it's too late to make any changes that might have been made.

If you feel something coming, approach your SO and tell him/her how much you care about him/her and ask if there's anything they need that they're maybe not getting. That'll at least give you an opportunity instead of waiting till the end and wondering what you could've done.

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Looking back i saw all the warning signs like meeting her friends more often and being quieter and more distant with me. Problem was her mom was terminally ill and passed away so I thought that was where the problem was. Should have realised when she didnt open upto me about stuff going on. Never mind, i will know for next time and learn from it.

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I've only been through one breakup and there were a lot of signs but I was too blind to realize it at the time. Now that it's over I can look back and think about all the signs I missed and now I see how obvious it was. I think sometimes our minds refuse to see what we don't want to believe.

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It can be difficult to notice the warning signs because they are giving off mixed signals and you just think they are in a mood. It's frustrating that they bottle it up and don't talk about it until it is too late.

 

I made a list of what i picked up on looking back:

 

* Starts going out with friends more

* They stay over less often

* They have less time to see you

* they want to go out in a group rather than just with you

* Start going to the gym a lot and have a make over

* Spends more time on the laptop/internet

* Sex stops or drops to a minimum

* they go quiet or start to go distant

* they start to nit pick at things that were never a problem

* you speak less online or on the phone(less texting too)

* they go to bed/sleep earlier

* they sleep facing away from you

* they stop making plans for the medium and long term, like holiday and settling down

* they start to roll their eyes or talk under their breath

* they dont laugh at your jokes anymore

* they dont return compliments or as touchy feely

* They are reluctant to be seen naked infront of you

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Do you ever see your break up coming? Changes in GF / BF behaviour? Do you maybe get a gut feeling that something isn't right? If so what are the main signs that you are on your way out?

 

 

IMO the attitude is very cold from one or the other and very distant. Alot more fighting and less tolerant to bickering and solving things.

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My relationship was long distance we lived in different towns,so we only saw each other at weekends. LDR make it harder to spot the signs. Looking back sometimes she would sit there quiet. Obviously waiting for me to ask whats up or she didn't have the courage to break up at that time. The time she did was the same day she buried her moms ashes. I always thought we had a trusting honest relationship, i think in a LDR you have to be like that. I've never been the jealous sort and let her do what she wants.

 

I wonder if the dumper wants the dumpee to finish things so then the dumper does feel bad or guilty.

 

I think the main things to watch out for is a lot less sex or no sex, nit-picking at minor stuff that never been a problem and they just want to hang out with you less.

 

Looking back you can see how the dumper is planning their exit so they have all their friends ready. I dont know if women are more organised when they want to split up. It feels that way.

 

Looking back you do wonder how you stuck it out so long without bring it up.

 

She said i wasnt open enough, which i kind of find funny when she kept things to herself and wouldnt open up to me. She also said we had little in common, if that was the case then how did we last 3 years?

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My first break up, I could kind of see it. He wasn't as interested in me anymore.

 

My most recent one... I should have followed my gut. I dumped him because he was unfaithful. But he hid it so well before I found out that I really thought it was going to last. It was only a matter of time until I did catch him. So in a sense he saw it coming, but not me.

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20 Walk Away Quotes: For when the T...
20 Walk Away Quotes: For when the Time Has Come to Finally Leave

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