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She said stuff, then broke up with me.


prestonztt

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Well about 3 months ago, me and my girlfriend of 2 years was going pretty good. You know, I messed up alot in the past, but i actually grew up and took step in what I wanted (Which is her) and what I needed to do (My kids). I mean we were going awesome.

 

She would send me texts like:

 

Im so glad your treating me like this, I really feel that im your princess and I love us so much.

 

I love you so much, you are my prince.

 

I love when your around cause it makes me happy.

 

We have talked about getting engaged again a couple times.

 

And just saying that she can tell that I have changed and it makes her so happy to know what I want. Which is them.

 

But one day, she came and picked me up from my friends house so I could watch the kids while her dad and her could go to the casino. I had no problem with that whatsoever. I had intentions of when she got home that I was gonna spend as much time with her as I could cause I wanted to try and and make the time up I never really spent with her.

 

Well about halfway there, she is like oh yeah, do you mind if I stay at my friends house tonight? Well I sort of over reacted and started crying for some reason and I was like, I dont want you to I wanted to spend as much time as I could with you. I just miss you alot. I said, you can go, but im not gonna be in the best mood. Well she was like whatever Preston, I just wont go. I was like go, she said no, cause you will get mad.

 

Well she came home after the casino with her dad, and it seemed we had a pretty good time. Well the next day was memorial day and the kids, Alicia, and I went to the park. We had an awesome day picnic, snow-cones, and lots of playing. So she drops me off back at my friends house. (We arent living together so I have to stay there and because we dont have our own place and her mom and dad dont want me to stay there anymore).

 

Well the next day we start texting and she doesnt text back for about an hour. So I call the house phone and when she picks up I hear one of my sons crying. She said "this is why you dont call the house phone. I said alright Ill let you go. She hangs up. Then about 4 hours later I call and her and her friend are at the casino and I apologize and stuff like that. Well her dad said I couldn't watch the kids up at there house anymore and im like, where am I suppose to watch them. So I get mad and I say "you have some f'ed parents. She hangs up and basically says she doesn't want to try with me anymore and that she doesn't think she loves me and that im to controlling.

 

I just dont see how someone could just say all those really nice things and say I love you, then a couple days later just throw everything away. Ill admit, our relationship has had some real rocky places in it. But we got thru them before. Now its been 2 months, she is still mad, she says she thinks I cant change, She just wants to concentrate on school and the kids, and sometimes she says she doesn't want to be with me and stuff like that.

 

I just honestly dont know how to interpret these things. Any insight would be highly appreciated. Thanks.

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There is probably a lot of pent up hostility from the past. I am sure she meant every text she sent and that she does love you. Though when you got upset and said you wouldn't be in the best mood if she hung out with her friends, she probably got really upset. She has kids and I am sure she want to do fun things. When you say stuff like that its like your making her feel bad for not wanting to spend time with you. Which is controlling in a way, even if was not your intension. Give her some space still be there but give her space. Keep improving, maybe try working on your own life by getting your own place, so if she does turn around you guys cant start your family were you all will be together. Why she has her me time have yours.

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i agree with divine malice. We hearing just your side but im curious as to what her side is. Honestly dude, breaking down and crying cause she wants to stay at her friends seems a bit childish and what sort of grudge to her parents have with you? did you cause alot of damage in the past? need more info. Sometimes even though your partner does really love you, the damage may be done and cannot be repaired.

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i agree with divine malice. We hearing just your side but im curious as to what her side is. Honestly dude, breaking down and crying cause she wants to stay at her friends seems a bit childish and what sort of grudge to her parents have with you? did you cause alot of damage in the past? need more info. Sometimes even though your partner does really love you, the damage may be done and cannot be repaired.

 

For some reason, I was just so emotional this time around. I have never been that way ever. Honestly I have caused alot of damage. Cheated the first month we were together and didnt tell her until about 3 months ago, didnt have my own place for the family, didnt hold a job down, and didnt treat her the best.

 

Basically her parents are control freaks, they love to feel that they are in control. Her mom and dad would always tell me how to raise my kids and I did not let that slide. I would tell them that they have no place to tell me how to raise them. They can give me suggestions but do not tell me how to raise them.

 

The reason I couldnt watch the kids anymore over there is the night her dad and her went to the casino I was watching them at there house. Well I was sleeping in my girls room with my youngest one and my other son was sleeping in his room which is down the hall. Well her dad was sleeping in the guest room which is right by my other sons room. My oldest son sleeps 12 hours a night and never wakes up and I mean never. Well for some reason he gets up that night and the monitor goes dead. So I dont hear him at all. Well her dad gets up and gets him a bottle and he goes back to sleep.

 

He told my girl that this was a trial period and that I failed cause I didnt get up cause I didnt hear him. So basically the trial period was for a month and one little slip up caused me not to stay there. Its just ridiculous it think.

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Well your lucky she has stayed with you this long. I am sorry but maybe that parents don't like you cause you are a cheater and like all parents want the best for their kids and you didn't pass the test.

Now that we have heard the whole story she is completely justified and more so, so are her parents. Do you expect people just forget what you have done and lied about it up until three months ago! Then you think you have the right to cry because she doesn't want to spend time with her. If I were her I would have dumped you three months ago!

You have no right to be upset with her or her parents you deserve it all. The fact that you are acting the way your are (crying and talking bad about her parents) Shows that you have not grown up much.

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With the parents being the way they are, this has happened since my first son was born. Honestly would you like when someone is trying to tell you raise your kids? I dont think anybody would. Hell, her mom and I had lunch about 3 weeks ago. They are just so bi-polar.

 

I dont talk bad about her parents at all. The only thing I have said was when I called them F'ed up. Her parents have gave me a place to stay for along time and I totally respect them for that.

 

But it always seems that her parents and her friend always jumps in mine and her business. Which they have no right to whatsoever.

 

I dont want anybody to feel sorry for me whatsoever. I know what I have done and I have to deal with that.

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With the parents being the way they are, this has happened since my first son was born. Honestly would you like when someone is trying to tell you raise your kids? I dont think anybody would. Hell, her mom and I had lunch about 3 weeks ago. They are just so bi-polar.

 

I dont talk bad about her parents at all. The only thing I have said was when I called them F'ed up. Her parents have gave me a place to stay for along time and I totally respect them for that.

 

But it always seems that her parents and her friend always jumps in mine and her business. Which they have no right to whatsoever.

 

I dont want anybody to feel sorry for me whatsoever. I know what I have done and I have to deal with that.

 

Then you'll probably have to deal with her leaving you. I do think that parents should stay out of their business and behave but I mean they will protect their daughter. But parents will always be there so you have to just deal.

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Correct me if I'm wrong, but you and her have 2 kids together, and she lives with her parents, and you live with yours?

 

If so, has this always been your living situation? If you're responsible enough to have children, you should be responsible enough to be living on your own, with the family you created.

 

I think this is one of the main problems here, you need to be on your own, not living with family.

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Then you'll probably have to deal with her leaving you. I do think that parents should stay out of their business and behave but I mean they will protect their daughter. But parents will always be there so you have to just deal.

 

And the real crappy part about it, is that she is a real family person. She says I dont respect them, but everytime I am around them I do.

 

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you and her have 2 kids together, and she lives with her parents, and you live with yours?

 

If so, has this always been your living situation? If you're responsible enough to have children, you should be responsible enough to be living on your own, with the family you created.

 

I think this is one of the main problems here, you need to be on your own, not living with family.

 

Yes you are absolutely right. We have lived by ourselves for only about 4 months, but we werent paying for it because my grandparents own the duplex. Basically we came from parents who spoiled the crap out of us. I know its not an excuse, but when your used to getting your way for 20 years, it gets hard to actually do stuff on your own.

 

Basically, I havent held a job, and like you said, you think thats a main problem as do I. I know that she wanted a since of security and stuff from me, but I never gave it to her. That was my fault. I blame most of the stuff that I have done on me. It hurts to know that I could do all this, but im not just gonna hide from it and say I never did anything. But hopefully by next week I will have this apartment. It just sad on my part that im doing all this stuff now. I hate it, trust me. It kills me every single day.

 

But I know right now, I need to focus on myself and the kids. And then maybe if she wants to try again someday that would be fine.

 

Honestly, if she called right now and said, lets get back together, I would say no. We have to do the things we need to do before we can think about relationship stuff right now.

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