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Methods for Getting Over Someone


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Been trying to get this person out of my head & it seems to be taking longer than I expected.

 

They lied about a lot of stuff so that is what i'm focusing on at the moment...the fact I can't trust her is 'almost' enough & a good start.

 

What i'm asking are there any techniques to getting over someone? I've heard that there may be some audio cd 'self-hypnosis' type stuff out there.

 

It might seem a bit extreme but that would suit me perfectly as I really don't want to have any feelings for this individual at all.

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The only thing that works for this situation is time. But there are many ways to distract from the pain. Such as: Spending time with your family, hanging out with your friends, making new friends and reaching out to the old ones, moving your furniture around for a new look, getting a whole new look for yourself, coming here on ENA for support, go to the gym to get back into shape, and atleast start flirting with members of the opposite sex.

 

Oh, and don't forget: NC NC NC! Do NOT contact the ex while attempting to get over them. You have to erase them from your life in order to move on. Good luck!

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Like Vertigo said: TIME TIME TIME, is the only way to completely heal and get over another person. It's been 2 years since my breakup, and I'm still not completely over it. The one thing I will say that has helped me is feeling better about myself. Usually when someone experiences a traumatic breakup, they start to question themselves. Was I not good enough? Am I too fat? Too skinny? Too ugly? Not successful enough? etc.. All of those doubts seem to play a part in the mourning process; In addition to plain old missing the person who broke your heart. Something I did was try to figure out the benefits of being single, and exploring things that made me feel better about myself, like hitting the gym, taking a writing class, meeting new people, taking trips, etc. With each of those experiences, I found myself healing more and more. Meeting different people took up the time I had to think about the ex. I'm not going to lie to you. The pain comes and goes, but over time it lightens. Don't be afraid to express how you're feeling to close friends and family, but not to the point where they dred hearing from you. Just enough to make yourself feel a little better about getting it out. Hope this helps, and good luck! I promise it will get better.

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Here's technique I use and I think it's working.

 

Make a list of the all the negatives about your ex. Old fights, times you questioned your love, all the bad times. Basically anything negative you can think of. Sit/lie down somewhere comfortable, close your eyes and bring each one of those memories back to life as if you were right there again. Keep going over them and over them. It's all about re-programming your mind with negative association.

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It may also help to tell yourself nice, encouraging things, such as "it's her/his loss", "I can be happy being single, but, I'm such a great catch, I'll find someone else just as good or better".

 

Think of all your positive qualities and conclude "he/she was a fool to let me go".

 

Also, get some exercise and put on some nice clothes to make you feel better about your appearance, in case that is something the breakup made you sensitive about.

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I purchased one of Paul McKenna's books which comes with a 'mind programming' CD. It's not meant for getting over someone but I think it's helped me a bit.

 

The person lied a lot and I wrote a lot down that I didn't like about them & that too helped. Good to see these things in black and white you can go back to later when in need of a confirmation that you were right.

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listen to music.. that helps a lot but don't listen to those that will remind you of your ex. think positive but don't dwell on the positive side of your relationship.

im also undergoing a break up recovery and i came accross a lot of stuff in the internet "psychology of break up" that will help you change your focus.. it said there that you ahve to try to minimize your contact with your ex or eliminate it all together, you have to forgive yourself and your ex, and you have to make changes in your life, read books, learn a new craft, get a new hobby, etc.. just try not to think too much about it.. besides you should put in mind that "love is not pain"

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