KG Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 I logged on last night. After I went to bed, he was googling "threeways", "anal with 2 men", "best BJ's", etc. I know at 14 he's curious, but I've drawn the line at softcore. This is too much too soon. Will let you know how it goes. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 Good luck hon....... It's tough being a parent to teen boys..... Link to comment
Doc Blaze Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 i had the talk...most embarrassing thing was when my mom left the videos right on my dresser so i could see them when i came home...then i had the father to son talk... Link to comment
KG Posted July 16, 2009 Author Share Posted July 16, 2009 We talk quite openly, but it will still be awkward! Link to comment
retired1 Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 At least it's a son. Try having 3 daughters. Link to comment
glegend Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 I've found similar thing son my cousins computer when I've been reformating it. Its really distrurbing. I've found a mix of straight and gay porn on it. I reformated my cousins computer about 3 months ago and I even found those Mily Cyrus pics of her half naked on that compuiter. Good Luck tough Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 At least he's the same sex.. my dad tries to act like sex is the most horrible crime anyone can commit..[well for his daughter anyways..] and it's always so awkward when the topic of sex comes up..I laugh now..and try to bring it up as much as I can to make it less awkward. Link to comment
SighSob Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 Like having "the talk" will stop him from searching for porn? I don't get it. Link to comment
blondissima Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 Is there something wrong with porn? Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 Like having "the talk" will stop him from searching for porn? I don't get it. Yeah, I agree. This will just make him smarter at hiding it and seeing you, the parent, as the enemy. If he's not actually going out and humping other guys or guys yet, let the boy explore. He's learning about himself and you telling him that learning about who he is and what he likes is inappropriate sends the wrong message. Link to comment
hers Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 Guys, don't jump on him for this. It's best for KG, who has a very open relationship wtih his son, to talk openly about this with him to see if there are any concerns or questions his son may have. Link to comment
greywolf Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 I agree that it probably will be very awkward, but isn't it illegal to allow underage kids to watch that stuff? Link to comment
KG Posted July 16, 2009 Author Share Posted July 16, 2009 I agree that it probably will be very awkward, but isn't it illegal to allow underage kids to watch that stuff? His "softcore" was women in flimsy bathing suits, bras, and the like. I don't think he should be viewing anal sex or threesomes. I have to draw the line somwhere. Link to comment
greywolf Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 His "softcore" was women in flimsy bathing suits, bras, and the like. I don't think he should be viewing anal sex or threesomes. I have to draw the line somwhere. I wasn't talking about you allowing him to watch softcore, my comment was directed to people who said you shouldn't talk to him about it. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 His "softcore" was women in flimsy bathing suits, bras, and the like. I don't think he should be viewing anal sex or threesomes. I have to draw the line somwhere. You'll draw the line and then he'll just watch it at a friend's house or go out and do it with someone. This could be so much worse. Ditching school, getting into fights, drug use. I don't think there's anything wrong with offering your son the opinion that you don't like it, but don't for one minute expect that it'll change his behavior. Link to comment
retired1 Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 It's obvious you aren't a parent. I wouldn't let my kids view that kind of stuff on the internet, either. Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 It's obvious you aren't a parent. I wouldn't let my kids view that kind of stuff on the internet, either. I'm not parent yet, but i'd being doing the same thing as KG. Link to comment
greywolf Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 You'll draw the line and then he'll just watch it at a friend's house or go out and do it with someone. This could be so much worse. Ditching school, getting into fights, drug use. I don't think there's anything wrong with offering your son the opinion that you don't like it, but don't for one minute expect that it'll change his behavior. I think it'd be good if KG at least talked to him about how porn is not realistic and does not represent real life. Link to comment
KG Posted July 16, 2009 Author Share Posted July 16, 2009 I think it'd be good if KG at least talked to him about how porn is not realistic and does not represent real life. I plan on that, as well as informing him it's disrespectful to watch others having sex. Link to comment
hers Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 i wouldn't say voyeurism is disrespectful as much as it is a fetish. there'd be no porn if people weren't voyeurs. maybe explain to him that it's a private act and talk about how to be respectful of others' sexuality and what they do. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 I plan on that, as well as informing him it's disrespectful to watch others having sex. Yea I agree.. Good that you're a parent who is trying to teach him right from wrong. I see so many kids who do it and their parents either ignore it or have no clue what's going on. My cousins parents have an even sicker approach: they say it's ok for them to watch as long as they (the dad) gets to watch too. Wth? My cousins have no respect in that way though. They'll purposely put on porn when the mom is in the room to make her feel akward, and she goes along with the mentality of "boys will be boys". Your son is curious and interested in sex... Kids grow up so fast these days (though some will disagree and say it's always been this way). Link to comment
KG Posted July 16, 2009 Author Share Posted July 16, 2009 You'll draw the line and then he'll just watch it at a friend's house or go out and do it with someone. This could be so much worse. Ditching school, getting into fights, drug use. I don't think there's anything wrong with offering your son the opinion that you don't like it, but don't for one minute expect that it'll change his behavior. We have one of the closest bonds a parent and child can have. We are left alone together after the death of my wife. We talk openly about sex, women, dates ( his and mine). He helps me around the house, has learned to cook, laundry, all to ease the burden of running the household. So I don't think he will do what you suggest. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 I have to say kudos to you KG... I don't know what I would be saying aside from "please don't watch it" lol. (j'k) I guess some good points are: -he's a bit too young to be watching this hard core stuff. it probably won't help but is good to mention that he should enjoy his youth. -it may be best he wait to have sex even if he is a guy. i sound like a prude but yeesh. -sex isn't really what they portray in porn. it's something that can also be done to express the love between a man and a woman. -the risk of STD's.. they're way more common then people think. Maybe try getting him into more sports lol. Or anything else which he can develop a real passion for. Even music.. Anything to get his mind off girls and help him with his own development as an indivual. Not a parent.. but just trying to help. Link to comment
hers Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 i agree with what jekyll bulleted--especially about sex isn't what's portrayed in porn. that may help on the respect part of the conversation. Link to comment
livinginsbi Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 I plan on that, as well as informing him it's disrespectful to watch others having sex. I think this is a great way to go KG... use the avenue of disrespect... but I'm afraid these other posters are correct... if he wants, he will find a way to view it elsewhere.. but you should express your concern and why you feel the way you do. You may not stop him from watching it, but at least he will know why you don't agree that he should watch it... and in this case.. yes, you have every right to tell him you don't want it in your home and you don't want these sites visited from your computer. Best wishes... teen age years are rough! Link to comment
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