Jump to content

Question for women about oral vs. penetration


jul-els

Recommended Posts

I'm just curious as to why for the times I have tried to get my partner off orally only to have her tell me she wants penetration right away?

 

This has happened with more than just one partner and it's always stumped me. Is it because I'm not good at it? Not to be egotistical, but I honestly don't believe that to be the case. I have brought a woman to climax orally many times.

 

The best explantion I've ever gotten was, "It just got to the point where I needed you inside me". That makes sense kinda, but if oral is the best route for women to climax-as I have heard/read so many times-then why wouldn't she want me to stay down there?

 

Ultimately whatever makes her happy makes me happy so it doesn't really matter. It's just something I've always wondered about so I figured I'd throw it out here and see what kind of answers I get.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's possible you're just not as good as you think you are, (if you really wanna know, ask an ex, if you've got one you talk to).

 

Otherwise, it's possible the girls you've been with have just preferred intercourse - oral isn't a better way of getting a girl off, every girl, guy and pairing is different, and different approaches will work more or less effectively, depending on the people involved. Could be they simply want sex, and now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

No matter what works the best physiologically, I think a lot of us find intercourse more satisfying psychologically. There's a lot of cultural conditioning telling us that intercourse is THE sex act and all else is foreplay. Plus the intimacy of penetration and the closeness, being face-to-face with your partner (well, in some positions!), feeling like it's something you're doing together vs. something one person is doing to/for the other.

 

So, lots of reasons!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For me, oral turns me on so much that I literally physically crave a penis in me. Plus, a big thing for me is when right after I get off (or even while I'm sitll getting off), penetration and sort of just going deeply as can be in there and then staying there puts pressure on my still sensitive clit and gives me an AMAZING feeling.

 

So it's possible you're very good at oral and she just wants your penis for a double win.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also, for us it's not always about the orgasm. I can have great sex without one (though it's a bonus if I have one). Like sunflour said, it's a psychological thing too.

 

Another thing to add is that we're not "spent" like guys are after oral. Guys who come from a bj are usually done but girls who come after oral aren't. There's a huge difference in sensation for me between oral and penetration. They both feel amazing but also very different and I want both sometimes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Honestly, the only times I've ever said that to a partner were when the oral wasnt that great or I wasnt getting off on it. Otherwise...who wouldnt want to have an orgasm?? And I agree with Hers in that right after a clittoral orgasm I am more sensitive and penetration feels amazing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oral's not as "satisfying" to most women as they are to men. Yes, it feels great, but sex feels better. Nothing to do with you. My ex husband used to always want to do oral all dang day and I'm like dude... put it in already...

 

 

This straight shooter comment is kind of funny as I was guilty of it in the last year of my long term relationship. It definitely shows though how women have changed and how precise their needs have become. My ex did finally say she wanted more penetration ( but loved oral) but I wish she communicated her needs more often than once.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oral's not as "satisfying" to most women as they are to men. Yes, it feels great, but sex feels better. Nothing to do with you. My ex husband used to always want to do oral all dang day and I'm like dude... put it in already...

 

That is not true. I can be perfectly satisfied with oral, it feels very amazing to me. I have a very sensitive clitoris and the clitoral orgasms I get from it are strong and satisfying

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And that women are set up differently from guys! Haha duh...

 

ok, smartypants...

 

It's weird that all of the times I've asked this question to all the different partners I've had I could never get a straight answer and I post it here and the answers come crawling out of the woodwork. Just hits too close too home, I guess. meh. Anyway, thanks again.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

No I just meant that guys are sometimes just fine with BJs and are done when they come. Girls are the exact opposite sometimes! Oral means they want more after!!

 

 

Yeah, I'm a girl, and I am fine with oral and can be done after I cum as well. I can fall right to sleep afterwards

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For me, oral turns me on so much that I literally physically crave a penis in me. Plus, a big thing for me is when right after I get off (or even while I'm sitll getting off), penetration and sort of just going deeply as can be in there and then staying there puts pressure on my still sensitive clit and gives me an AMAZING feeling.

 

So it's possible you're very good at oral and she just wants your penis for a double win.

 

I would have to say this poster did my work for me. (haven't read the whole thread)

 

I actually think that if you start giving her oral and she then really, really wants penetration, you've done it really well. Because even though the orgasm may be tied to the clitoral stimulation, there is some animal need to be "filled", the more turned on she gets.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I sometimes to that - tell the guy to come in - if I feel to much pressure to come and it's not so pleasurable anymore. So I need a change.

 

Anyway, I don't necessarily say you are doing it wrong. But perhaps pay more attention to your gf and ask her what she likes while you're doing it, reassure her to relax and tell her you want to do it like hours and hours You might have known how to give orgasm like that to some girls, but every girl is different and you need to update your skills most likely.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would have to say this poster did my work for me. (haven't read the whole thread)

 

I actually think that if you start giving her oral and she then really, really wants penetration, you've done it really well. Because even though the orgasm may be tied to the clitoral stimulation, there is some animal need to be "filled", the more turned on she gets.

 

 

Above two posters actually somehow agree with me. That there will be a point when you grave him to come in. And that is fine! But the graving comes cos the oral is not ENOUGH. But it can be ENOUGH. And give you many many orgasms in the row You just have to be great at it!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I would have to say this poster did my work for me. (haven't read the whole thread)

 

I actually think that if you start giving her oral and she then really, really wants penetration, you've done it really well. Because even though the orgasm may be tied to the clitoral stimulation, there is some animal need to be "filled", the more turned on she gets.

 

No, I never got that grave need to be filled afterwards. I was literally satisfied. After I have a clitoral orgasm, I am sleepy and dry up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...