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Fear of death


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Breakdown of me

 

-28 year old male

-close family died years ago(brother and mother)

-alone

-overweight

 

The last few months I've had pain in my chest. I've gone to the doctors, EKG is normal, and just slightly high cholesterol.

 

I feel like I have something wrong with me, I'm affraid I will die. I'm alone. I don't know what to make of it. I'm mainly scared b/c if I die I am not the person I want to be, I haven't figured it all out yet. I have no one to talk to. I've been dating someone for a few weeks but I dare not tell them any of this.

 

I keep saying I have no control over what happens, I can just focus on being healthy from here on out.

 

Anyone get these fear of mortality? I feel so alone and I sense death and percieve the nothingness of the abyss, Its quite scary.

 

People get so caught up in the commercialized life here in the U.S. the celebrity style of nothing bad will ever happen to them. but I've seen the dark side I've had my family die. I don't want to die, Although I know we all will. I guess it's good to talk about it. My friend regard me as creepy if I voice these fears, no one wants to hear about it I guess.

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I was like that too for a long time. It happened right after a chain of life changing events, (Best friend died in car wreck, the next night my sister was in a coma and dr said she wouldn't make it, my grandfather passes, my uncle commits suicide, grandmother had a stroke, ex girl for three years left me.. all in less than a year). My point is that I understand where your at and what your feeling. But if you continue to allow yourself to think that way you will never get out of that tunnel. What helped me was time and letting everything go. I healed and I carried on and found peace and now I don't worry like I did before. You learn to accept the unknown and accept what life is full of today.

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I have suffered loss also but I can't say I have ever felt that way.

 

Go back to the doctor and tell him/her how you feel and ask for a full medical check-up (and a second opinion if you feel its necessary) if only to give yourself peace of mind. Don't live in fear like that.

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I have a fear of developing diabetes. I've gained a lot of weight over the past 3 years, and I worry that since some family members have gotten it, I'll get it too.

 

When you have a fear like this, it's not always rational, but it's still scary. I'd check with your doctor before I'd start worrying. Your fears are probably not based in reality.

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thanks guys, it feels good just to get input from another living person. E-not alone hehe

 

 

Sitting at home, trying to calm a worried wandering mind. gripping fear. you think oh well I might die, and then thinking of god or lack there of of beyond and death and how I will miss the few people I have left. It's just so fricking much to bear.

 

this only happens when I get a weird feeling in my body and think that I might die. why the hell does this happen to me.

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this only happens when I get a weird feeling in my body and think that I might die. why the hell does this happen to me.

 

It sounds like it could be a panic attack, perhaps. I'm familiar with those. Sense of impending doom? Increased heart rate (or the feeling of it, at least)? Tingling sensations? Unreasoning fear?

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i'm a huge fan of weight watchers. they'll help you get healthy, and for me, it's really motivating to do it together with a group of people. maybe you can also get a personal trainer and come up with some kind of workout regimine. you can get your life under control, you don't have to be overweight and alone the rest of your life.

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I've been kind of that way ever since my grandmother's funeral last year. Which is weird because I've gone through 3 grandparents and an uncle prior, and I returned to a state of normalcy after that. And I wasn't really close to her or anything, since she had dimensia for years and years, so I don't know why this death stuck with me.

 

Maybe it's because now my parents are next in line, which is a weird feeling. Or maybe it's because it happened right after I graduated college. When you're in schoold you just take things one year at a time, there was always a scale of progress going grade to grade, looking to graduate the next school. It's hard to see beyond that next hill. But once you graduate college, it feels like the rest of your life is laid out before you and all you can see is the slope leading to that abyss at the end.

 

And it doesn't help when the economy's down and instead of making that year to year progress you're used to you now feel like you're stuck in limbo as the inevitable just gets closer and closer.

 

Okay, I'm probably just ranting for my own sake and not helping your situation at all, ack

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Then I suggest you look into panic attacks - it would seem you've been getting them. They suck, I know. Just remember that the feeling of impending doom is entirely false: you're safe when it happens, despite feeling anything but. It's one major reaction to an anxiety/stress that isn't being processed consciously...

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fear and worry...not pleasant.

 

i hear yah on the 'death' concept...at least about wondering who you can talk to about it. i think our modern society has a certain aversion towards it. there's a fear of 'endings' in general. they aren't at all embraced.

 

i dunno. i've been reading some buddhist teachings of late. the concept of death is much different when you consider it in a spiritual sense. death is not an opposite to life...but merely an opposite to birth (i don't have any particular beliefs when it comes to the notion of 'afterlife'). life has no true opposite. it is the one impermanent aspect.

 

i know this kind of 'belief' doesn't sit well with everyone...but for me it's been a great source of peace. i've begun to contemplate death. the idea that it's only an end to a physical form can be very liberating when you find the truth in it. where you are in the external world ultimately has no bearing on the 'life' within you. it can be very difficult to find the truth in it...but if and when you do realize it...your life changes drastically. fear and anxiety virtually disappear. up until recently, i lived the majority of my life in a perpetual state of unease. i was very much prone to anxiety attacks, depression, addiction (not serious), etc. no achievement or gain in my life filled the void. i had a rather gloomy, cynical outlook on everything. i was bent on various forms of self-destruction.

 

haha...sounds like i've been 'born-again'. that's probably the label i would've given it a few years back...although i'm not speaking of an affiliation to any sort of religion. i guess...if you're at all open to the idea, it might be beneficial for you to explore it on your own. not suggesting it's an amazing new solution to every problem (hasn't been for me as of yet)...but you might find some simple truths that help to free you from destructive thoughts and

an almost constant sense of unease.

 

cheers.

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