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Dinner after breakup. How to handle it?


thlocke

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Me and my ex-girlfriend broke up last Sunday. I am 21 and she is 18. We were only going out for a month but things moved very fast and it was very intense. We pretty much talked online all day while we were at work and even slept over a few times during the week.

 

However, being in a serious relationship like this was a new experience for me. I should say that I've only recently started dating and coming out of my shell. Usually I am hesitant to tell people how I feel or become emotional, but I let my guard down and didn't want to let her go. As a result I became way too attached to her and pretty much put no space between us.

 

I could tell she was getting annoyed but never changed how I acted. Only now after she broke up with me am I able to understand why she did it. She said she wanted to be friends and I agreed as I still wanted to see her again.

 

So the night after we broke up she called me saying she was bored and we talked for awhile about mostly random everyday stuff. The next night I call her and we talk again, nothing serious. That was Tuesday and was the last time I talked to her besides online a few times.

 

Yesterday I just couldn't take not knowing if she still had feelings for me or not. I sent her a text asking if she was up to anything that night. After awhile she responded that she was hanging out with some guy.

 

I didn't respond as I didn't know how. A couple minutes later she sends another text:

 

"Don't worry, he's gay."

 

I then asked if she was up to meeting with me sometime. She said yes. I asked if she was free for dinner sometime this week. She said she was free Wednesday or after. That's pretty much where we left things.

 

I need advice on how to finalize this. Should I text or call her tonight asking if we were still on for Wednesday? Or let her contact me?

 

Also, assuming we go to dinner, is there anyway to tell if she sees me as just a friend or wants to give our relationship another chance? I know make-up and what she wears are clues, but is there any other factors besides straight out asking her?

 

This is new to me so the more advice the better. I just want to get another chance to show her that I have learned and have changed. Thank you.

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My advice is simply to be direct. With thinly veiled inferance and un-said assumptions you're just going to get into a world of hurt that you can avoid by asking or telling.

 

As for how to finalise, just a casual text asking if she wants to meet there, or if she wants you to pick her up. Something like that.

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