Jump to content

helping someone see sense


teach

Recommended Posts

Hi all,

 

Last December I started seeing a girl from work. We ended up in bed after the Christmas party and began to see each other over Christmas and beyond. The thing was we both knew I was moving away and so it was just a casual relationship. I saw her a few times after I moved away when visiting for the weekend. But we both knew that it wouldn't last because of this and the fact that I would want kids at some in the distant future and she already had some and didn't want any more.

 

I was fine with this, I understood, and although I missed her, and thought she was a great girl and we got on absolutely brilliantly in every other respect, that was fine. We stayed friends and I wished her well.

 

However, I found out the other day that she had been seeing another ex colleague of mine. He has been having affairs on his wife for years including with his ex students (we are all school teachers) 20 years younger than him and other work colleagues. In fact he has such a reputation for lying and cheating that its beyond belief. His wife has found out and he's been thrown out of her house. Its made me furious, and I have to admit upset my pride that she could go for someone like that. Not only has he got this reputation, he is also 9 years older than her, and not exactly a looker either. She could do so much better.

 

I suppose I should leave well alone and let her make her own mistakes. But she left me a lovely e-mail the other day saying how she had liked me for a year before I left and saying she really cares about me and all the rest of it. Saying she wouldn't meant to upset anyone etc, etc, etc. It makes me feel furious he's wangled his way into her, because she is so caring and lovely that I am sure she has been taken in by his lies.

 

So can I make her see sense, if so how? And if not do I leave well alone?

 

Thanks all

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think you should take her off that pedestal you have her on. People can be caring and lovely in some aspects of their life and completely selfish, foolish and thoughtless when it comes down to their genitals and having orgasms. Look at her track record...you were a colleague and she embarked on a casual relationship with you knowing it wouldn't go anywhere because you were leaving....now she is embarking on another casual fling with another unavailable colleague. She banged you after the Christmas party...that is quite the cliché, the office Christmas party where two co-workers have some drinks and have a casual hookup...yes yours lasted for a little while but it was just an ongoing hookup not a relationship. So while she may be a caring, lovely person that is a completely separate issue from her sexual appetite and she will get her sex needs met by anyone...someone moving away, someone married with a bad reputation etc..she doesn't care as long as she has a sex partner. It takes two...you were one of her fling partners and now she has another fling partner...everyone is equally responsible for their part they played...this guy may be sleazy, but so is your ex fling sleazy because she doesn't care about the fact that this guy is married.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As a married man some women have tried to seduce me and I have rejected them. Funny thing is how before too long you see these women getting close to a variety of men. Im sorry to say that she seems like one of those crazies i have rejected.

Move on ..she is a player girl!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

you're probably still blinded by your emotions and because you have feelings for her, you're trying to justify her behavior while demonizing his - but the problem is, it takes two to tango, and this girl is just as guilty/bad as the guy. I would wash my hands of this entire mess and have nothing to do with either of them - you can't play with a bomb and not have it explode in your face at some point - why be around them when that happens?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...