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Not reaching orgasm :(


ziggie31
Is My Relationship Over - Signs
Is My Relationship Over - Signs

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Ok, this is a really weird and really aggravating problem that my bf and I have faced.

 

Almost every time we have sex, he's able to get me off. If for whatever reason he finishes before I do, we'll usually try again. Basically, we rarely have a night where we'll go at it and not both get our rocks off.

 

However, for the past couple of nights, I haven't been able to get off a single time. Neither of us are doing anything different that I can think of. I'll feel like I'm getting close but it just won't happen.

 

This isn't usually a problem and it's become very frustrating for both of us because no matter how hard we try it just doesn't work. I don't know what could be causing it or how to fix it, and I'm afraid to just keep trying because I don't want constant failure to dissuade us from having sex. Help?

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When you begin to "try" and it becomes work, you're setting up for disappointment. Just accept that there will be the odd time where one or the other doesn't reach orgasm and go from there. It happens to all of us at one time or another. If you start to dwell on it, it just leads to further frustration and issues.

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When you begin to "try" and it becomes work, you're setting up for disappointment. Just accept that there will be the odd time where one or the other doesn't reach orgasm and go from there. It happens to all of us at one time or another. If you start to dwell on it, it just leads to further frustration and issues.

 

That's the thing - each of these times, we both went into it thinking nothing was out of the ordinary, and that we wouldn't have any trouble both getting off. I only got psyched out afterwards. It's the fact that it keeps failing to happen, over and over and over, and seemingly out of nowhere, that's bothering us, because we've never had this kind of problem before.

 

Yeah, I mean so you've not orgasmed for the past few nights, hardly the end of the world is it? I never used to reach orgasm half the time whilst with my husand, just relax and you'll be fine.

 

I understand where you're coming from, with my ex I NEVER orgasmed the whole time we were together, not once. My bf is the first one to get me to do so. The only thing that's bothering me is that we've somehow gone from almost always getting the job done to not being able to finish at all. It wouldn't bother me if it had always been that way, but it's a very abrupt and disconcerting change.

 

is something on your mind? something bothering you during the day?#

 

Often, if something is on a person's mind it can have an effect on their sexual function.

 

Actually that's the funny thing, a few weeks ago we were both going through a lot of * * * * , had a lot on our minds, etc., and the sex remained absolutely fine. Now that we're both feeling a lot better and things are going smoothly, the sex isn't working out

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sounds like you are surfing a platue, maybe you have being doing it too much and need a break for a week or two, at least from penetration?

 

Hmm. I could try that, though I still don't really understand why this is happening. We had a break from sex just last week while I was on my period, when I finished we did it a couple times with no problem, and then bam, this happens. We've gone weeks and weeks having sex before with no problem. But I could definitely take a break from it and see if it helps at all.

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Hmm. I could try that, though I still don't really understand why this is happening. We had a break from sex just last week while I was on my period, when I finished we did it a couple times with no problem, and then bam, this happens. We've gone weeks and weeks having sex before with no problem. But I could definitely take a break from it and see if it helps at all.

 

Oh, if it does not improve your sex life you won't curse me will ya? Seriously though this might just do the trick, stop having sex until you can't take it any more

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