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Why is he calling me on his birthday??


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Today is my ex's 21st birthday and after getting advice from everyone here on ENA I decided not to call or do anything to recognize his birthday....

 

Some background info in a nutshell: We were together for 3.5 years. Broke up 3 months ago. Went NC, then LC, and have been NC for about 2 and a half weeks now. He got involved with someone right after our break up, and he is in a relationship with her, but she is out of state for 3 months.

 

...So we've been NC and I just go a phone call from him, around 8:30pm. I ignored it to see if he would leave a voicemail. He texted, "Hey did you just try calling?" Obviously I didn't try calling him so I was confused and didn't respond. A minute later he calls again and I ignore it. Instead I just texted back "No I didn't." He texts back, "Sorry it was Justin making a fake call on this phone program. Hey anyways."

 

Anyone have any insight??

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Aww, sounds like he was fishing for a happy birthday from you and wanted to play dumb just in case he got rejected. Poor guy...pretty silly move to go fishing on his birthday...but you know he's definitely thinking of you and probably was hoping you'd acknowledge him. Are you going to say anything or let it go?

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Aww, sounds like he was fishing for a happy birthday from you and wanted to play dumb just in case he got rejected. Poor guy...pretty silly move to go fishing on his birthday...but you know he's definitely thinking of you and probably was hoping you'd acknowledge him. Are you going to say anything or let it go?

 

That is what I thought at first. Maybe he was hurt that I didn't acknowledge his birthday and is drunkenly making these phone calls. Which I'm hoping is the case....But then it could have been him and his friends playing games and trying to mess with me too. I thought about sending his friend (who apparently made the fake call) a message explaining that I don't appreciate the fake calls. If he was trying to work out a program he could have called anyone else, but why me? That is not okay in my book. This break up has put me in the darkest place I've ever been in my life and have been trying really hard to move on. Now I feel like I'm back where I started.

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That is what I thought at first. Maybe he was hurt that I didn't acknowledge his birthday and is drunkenly making these phone calls. Which I'm hoping is the case....But then it could have been him and his friends playing games and trying to mess with me too. I thought about sending his friend (who apparently made the fake call) a message explaining that I don't appreciate the fake calls. If he was trying to work out a program he could have called anyone else, but why me? That is not okay in my book. This break up has put me in the darkest place I've ever been in my life and have been trying really hard to move on. Now I feel like I'm back where I started.

 

Even if he was being a jerk, the fact that he did it on his birthday does show he must be feeling bad deep down. Definitely not justifiable though if he was acting that way. I think that's totally reasonable...to call and tell his friend you don't appreciate fake calls...but only if you really think it was fake because if it wasn't, you might feel worse.

 

Personally, I think you should just leave it alone, the way it sounds here. It's up to you of course, but he's fishing for attention....why couldn't he do that on a day other than his birthday? And you're feeling really badly right now so it definitely isn't helping you to be in contact.

 

In any case, I hope you feel better soon.

 

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yeah, sounds like he's drunk and was wanting to hear from you. who broke up with whom?

 

He broke up with me. I did the whole crying, begging, depression thing. He wanted to help me get healthy again, but said I was pushing him away. He wanted me to leave him alone and to stop trying to get involved in his personal life...so I am. Which is why I am so confused. He's said he has moved on and is happy with his new long distance girlfriend.

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I would go back to NC and not do anything. That's pretty low of him to contact you on his birthday and do it by not even admitting that it was him that was making the contact. He is just looking to boost his ego. Start over with NC and become even stronger. Don't let him get to you and push you back to the start just so he can boost his ego by learning you still care. He hasn't proven he is worthy, and he probably never will be of your attention. NC!

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