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but won't talk to me about it. this hurts so much. I know that I can't do anything about it, and I'm trying so hard to just accept it and keep doing my own thing, but it hurts nonetheless. she won't answer my calls or return them. she just replies to my tweets (on twitter) every once in a while and I see her tweets all day.. it just kills me. I've sent her sentimental messages, you know like "I miss you", lovely stuff. Sweet stuff. And I haven't even been pushing too hard. She's going through her own stuff right now and dealing with a family death, so I know everyone goes through stuff in their own way, but this really is like ugggggh, like stabbing my heart. I'd rather know what's going on and how she's feeling than just making an assumption and personalizing it.

 

I feel like I'm obsessing.. she's on my mind all day.. last thing before I go to sleep and first thing when I wake up. I check my phone to see if she texted. If I get a call, my heart starts racing, hoping it's her and it's not.

 

We never made a "commitment" to e/o.. but we were lovers and it was great. I thought we were on the same page. We could talk about anything. Now.. what happened? I'm crying.. I just need closure. This uncertainty is painful.

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i'm so sorry. That's no fun. i think it is important that you stay strong though. i know you care about her and stuff but you want to be strong in case she does need you. I know i wouldnt bring my troubles to a friend who is already upset about things. Just try to distract yourself. maybe you just need time. Some people dont like to talk about things until it's less painful.

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Hi Jessica, thanks for responding. I was feeling hopeless there for a minute. She finally got in touch, but wouldn't talk about "us". She said she wants to see me in person so we can talk about it. I'm not nervous about that.. actually I look forward to it, so I can know what is going on. I've already prepared myself for the worst, so just knowing is going to help.

 

We both are going through a lot. This situation is teaching me patience. It's hard, but it's necessary.

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