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When (or if) should I mention that I'm a virgin?


mfan

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I haven't dated since college - wasn't looking to date, and in fact I am still a virgin. I'm not upset about it; I feel it is completely by choice. But if I start dating a woman, when is it appropriate for me to mention that I am a virgin? In my personal ad? After a couple of dates? Just before we get intimate? Only afterwards? Never?

 

I appreciate your opinions.

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In the personal ad? haha, definitely not there.

 

I'm also a virgin. I've thought about this too. It's definitely not a bad thing, so don't worry about it too much. Whoever we meet down the road should be happy because of it, not annoyed in any way. We aren't weird. We're just not the norm.

 

I think you should tell that person eventually, but after a few dates or whatever. Not right away. Once they get to know you a little better. I guess it can weird people out because it's so unexpected nowadays, but don't let that make you feel inadequate. Everyone was there at some point.

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I haven't dated since college - wasn't looking to date, and in fact I am still a virgin. I'm not upset about it; I feel it is completely by choice. But if I start dating a woman, when is it appropriate for me to mention that I am a virgin? In my personal ad? After a couple of dates? Just before we get intimate? Only afterwards? Never?

 

I appreciate your opinions.

 

i'm not sure why you would mention it at all?

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This isn't who you are is it?

It is just something you haven't experienced yet.......like skydiving.

Wait until the need or question comes up to keep things from being awkward. Like CAD said, "when you feel you can trust her." By then you won't even give it as much thought.

 

One thing at a time okay. Meet a nice girl you really like and then let's worry about the sexual stuff.

 

Lost

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I've only dated one virgin and he told me on the second date. It wasn't awkward at all though. We were at his place and had been talking for hours and got on the subject of dating, our pasts, etc. and he told me. It went really well and I would just suggest waiting until the conversation gives you an opportunity to mention it.

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I've only dated one virgin and he told me on the second date. It wasn't awkward at all though. We were at his place and had been talking for hours and got on the subject of dating, our pasts, etc. and he told me. It went really well and I would just suggest waiting until the conversation gives you an opportunity to mention it.

 

 

Did you pop that cherry?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And as I mentioned earlier.......wait until your both naked.

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I would think it would turn women off...UNLESS you chose it. Usually men don't choose to be virgins, they are virgins because something is wrong with them and no other women wanted any part of that.

 

I don't think that's your case but i wouldn't tell a girl that in case she thought something is wrong with me.

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i think you should be honest, but not forward.

 

if the topic comes up, be honest about it, but don't feel the need to go out of your way and bring it up. i think that purposely making it known and making a big thing of it will make it just that...it'll make HER feel more uncomfortable about it too.

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Don't tell her at all, it will become very evident the first time you do it. She'll probably ask you if you were a virgin.

 

Like one of the other repliers, people will think there is something wrong with you. Women don't like guys with low sex drives and if you say it was for religious reasons, they won't devirginize you because they would feel weird.

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I would say there is no need to mention it. Have you been intimate at all with a woman - have you done other sexual stuff and just not had full sex?

 

The person who said how do you get to be 33 and still be a virgin - I think it is unusual, but probably more usual for men than women. If it was a woman who was a virgin at that age not through her own choice I would think 'how on earth' because women get approached for men no matter what they look like. Because men have to do the approaching I can sort of see how some guys might get to 33 and still be a virgin.

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As soon as you bust that first nut raise both hands in the air, look to the heavens and yell "I'M NOT A VIRGIN ANYMORE!!!!!!!" She'll get the message.

 

 

No, seriously I was 30, or 31 can't remember now. I told her when it became quite clear that we were gonna get sexually intimate. For weeks she was begging me to pick up some condoms on the way to her house and I ended up saying "I don't want to freak you out, but I'm a virgin. I do want to have sex with you, but I want to make sure I'm doing for the right reasons and not just to have sex with anyone." This made her want me more and about a month later I relented and turned in my virgin badge.

 

Even now, I still make them wait a while before I have sex, it's a very relationshipy thing to me.

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