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Question for the guys, I think I'm ready to meet women in public and have one question


ConfusedDater
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I was clothes shopping this evening and was flirting with the sales woman and asking her opinion on what colors I should buy and making her laugh which caused her to say-"you are a funny guy...

 

She said my name from seeing it on my credit card. Then when she gave my my bag after paying for my clothes, instead of her handing me the bag over the counter, she came from behind the counter to give me my bag with a smile.

 

 

So my question is this, I now know how to flirt and make women laugh and what could I have said in order to get her number or give her my number?

 

 

I'm almost there and hopefully I won't have to use dating sites in the next couple of months.

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When I worked at Safeway, it was required that you use the persons name if they gave you a credit card. They give you a credit card, you say, "Have a good day Guss", "Thanks for shopping at Safeway Ms. Screen". They had secret shoppers go through the store to make sure we were doing as we were supposed to.

 

We were also required to smile at the customers.

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When I worked at Safeway, it was required that you use the persons name if they gave you a credit card. They give you a credit card, you say, "Have a good day Guss", "Thanks for shopping at Safeway Ms. Screen". They had secret shoppers go through the store to make sure we were doing as we were supposed to.

 

We were also required to smile at the customers.

 

No I was saying she said my name when complimenting me. Now when I was leaving the store

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With all respect, I really hate that. I'm like just give me my groceries and never mind my name already. Kinda envy those people with long complicated names like "Nychliaph5quaski" - good luck on that!

 

To the OP: one never knows if the sales clerk is being friendly and inviting or weather they are just doing their job. The only way is to ask them out, if you get shot down then laugh it off and go shopping somewhere else.

 

 

I wanted to but I was wondering if there was something that comes before-"what are you doing Friday?

 

 

Looking back at it now I guess I could have asked her

 

What is your name

You just started working here

Are you from this area?

 

After that I'm stuck again

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"Now that you know my name, tell me yours..."

 

She tells you her name.

 

"Well name, it was fun , maybe we could do this again..."

 

Wait for her response. If it's positive... then:

 

"What do you suggest?"

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I don't see how this woman was an option.

 

She works on commission, was being friendly to get the sale, said your name as part of sales training, and also walked around to give you your bag, as part of sales protocol.

 

I think you have a problem understanding a legitimate green light, CD. It seems that anything that any woman says to you, gets twisted into a "she wants me!" mentality.

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I don't see how this woman was an option.

 

She works on commission, was being friendly to get the sale, said your name as part of sales training, and also walked around to give you your bag, as part of sales protocol.

 

I think you have a problem understanding a legitimate green light, CD. It seems that anything that any woman says to you, gets twisted into a "she wants me!" mentality.

 

I been shopping in that store for 16 years and no cashier has never walked around the counter to give me my bag when they could have just handed to me over the counter.

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Flirting with sales chicks is a hard one as they're required to be friendly and polite to customers, sometimes even go out of their way to flirt and do what they have to do to get the sale.

 

You would've lost nothing by asking her what her name is or asking her for a drink after work.

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CD, she's at work. Just doing her job. I do the same at my job as a large part of my pay is commissioned based. Not that I'm not friendly and helpful to all people, but yeah, if I sense a physical attraction I will manipulate that to my advantage. This doesn't mean that I'm interested in anything outside my job. I do this with married women too... it makes the customer feel good about spending money. It's a job. You ever wonder why so many of the most successful sales people are also good looking? It's not by coincidence. Totally innocent behavior on her part, and it sounds like you are not able to see the forest from the trees on this one.

 

-Kevin

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CD, she's at work. Just doing her job. I do the same at my job as a large part of my pay is commissioned based. Not that I'm not friendly and helpful to all people, but yeah, if I sense a physical attraction I will manipulate that to my advantage. This doesn't mean that I'm interested in anything outside my job. I do this with married women too... it makes the customer feel good about spending money. It's a job. You ever wonder why so many of the most successful sales people are also good looking? It's not by coincidence. Totally innocent behavior on her part, and it sounds like you are not able to see the forest from the trees on this one.

 

-Kevin

 

I guess I'm not used to a sales woman complimenting me and treating me like a KING_lol Maybe it was above and beyond custmer service but I don't hear "You are a Funny guy" too often from a woman I just met.

 

Plus when she said that the sale was over

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Keep it up, salesgirls need love too, and though they may be just doing their job, they are also human beings who get attracted to people who engage them in the right way. It's a great place to start getting comfortable with talking to strange women.

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I think you have a problem understanding a legitimate green light, CD. It seems that anything that any woman says to you, gets twisted into a "she wants me!" mentality.

Ha! When a woman is moving her lips while looking at me, all I hear is "I want you!". :splat:

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well, this situation was non-threatening to you. you weren't actually trying to hit on her, so i wouldn't say you know how to flirt in person. you got caught off guard by her behavior and you did nothing about it.

 

i would have said, 'you should give me your number and we should meet up for a drink sometime.' and look at her nametag and say her name at the end of that.

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"So, what are you doing Friday night?"

 

You: So, what are you doing Friday night?

Her: I don't know, would you be interested in having a drink?

You: Not really, I was just practicing my face to face communication skills. I wanted to see what would happen if I said that. I enjoyed meeting you today and I'll see you next time I shop here. Bye bye

 

I'm sorry, please ignore this post

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You: So, what are you doing Friday night?

Her: I don't know, would you be interested in having a drink?

You: Not really, I was just practicing my face to face communication skills. I wanted to see what would happen if I said that. I enjoyed meeting you today and I'll see you next time I shop here. Bye bye

 

I'm sorry, please ignore this post

 

Bahahaha I'd pay to see that interaction!

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Just ask the woman out (after introducing yourselves of course). So what if she is profiting from being nice to you; don't we all profit from being nice to each other, whether we're in a relationship or not? If she sees something more than just a money-machine in you, it could be worth your while.

 

But as others have said, don't expect this to be a clear winner. Just embrace the fact that you will make mistakes in your judgment like everyone else, and that a life without risk (even without the slight risk of annoying a cashier) is not worth living.

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Go and see if she remembers you. That will be a good gauge on her interest.

 

Tell her, I came to adopt you as my new clothing consultant. I liked your ideas when it comes to fashion. *high 5* Banter with her a bit more and try something like this..Give me your number so next time I have to pick between 2 shirts I can call you. I promise I will only call 60 times a day. (knowing you CD you may..)

 

Don't let the fact that she is at work bother you either. I actually just met an incredibly cute bartender last weekend by using similar stuff. I was drinking water and she kept dressing it up. I kept telling her how she is my favorite bartender and has the best water in town. I just kept messing with her and eventually she introduced herself to me. I got her number and hope to see her next week when I get back from a vaci.

 

Good luck man.

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Forget sales women.

 

Don't even go there.

 

These women are paid to keep customers happy and wanting to come back, and that often includes flirting (women know what makes men want to come back, duh).

 

Forget her.

 

Go and chat with a woman who is NOT selling you anything.

 

Exactly. I dated 2 girls that were waitresses, a bartender, and one that sold cars for a bit, and their #1 complaint was that customers were constantly hitting them up for their number. One of the girls and I had a game where we'd bet on how many random guys would leave their number (unsolicited) during her shifts.

 

The other thing is that all of them were totally oblivious as to why they got hit on in the first place because they didn't think they were being flirty at all, and it usually made them very uncomfortable when it happened (especially when it was creepy, older men hitting on them). I think the mindset of most women working in a customer service-related job is that they just want to be able to do their work without having to deal with all the awkwardness associated with fending off desperate guys.

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Something similiar happened to me yesterday. I stopped at my usual coffee hangout, there is a new girl there. Very nice, asks me what I'm reading ( Stephen King ). I was showing my son's pics to another waitress, she comes over, complimenting him.

 

Now she's not looking for a tip from one cup of coffee, but being very friendly. As I was leaving, she and the other waitress were outside having a smoke. I pulled up to wave goodbye, she says "don't be a stranger!" I asked "are you working the same shift tomorrow?" "Yes".

"I'll see you then, OK?"

"Sounds great."

 

So today I'm going to ask her out.

 

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

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Exactly. I dated 2 girls that were waitresses, a bartender, and one that sold cars for a bit, and their #1 complaint was that customers were constantly hitting them up for their number. One of the girls and I had a game where we'd bet on how many random guys would leave their number (unsolicited) during her shifts.

 

The other thing is that all of them were totally oblivious as to why they got hit on in the first place because they didn't think they were being flirty at all, and it usually made them very uncomfortable when it happened (especially when it was creepy, older men hitting on them). I think the mindset of most women working in a customer service-related job is that they just want to be able to do their work without having to deal with all the awkwardness associated with fending off desperate guys.

 

they leave off that sentence, 'by guys they aren't that attracted to.' but you will never know if you don't try. i do it. doesn't always work, but i do.

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Exactly. I dated 2 girls that were waitresses, a bartender, and one that sold cars for a bit, and their #1 complaint was that customers were constantly hitting them up for their number. One of the girls and I had a game where we'd bet on how many random guys would leave their number (unsolicited) during her shifts.

 

The other thing is that all of them were totally oblivious as to why they got hit on in the first place because they didn't think they were being flirty at all, and it usually made them very uncomfortable when it happened (especially when it was creepy, older men hitting on them). I think the mindset of most women working in a customer service-related job is that they just want to be able to do their work without having to deal with all the awkwardness associated with fending off desperate guys.

 

I sort of pity female sales reps, if you ask me. Virtually all women sales staff that I ever met seemed uncomfortable with their job despite acting very nice, especially the attractive-looking ones. In my area, most if not all clerical and sales positions are filled by women, and I get the impression that their employers expect them to go the extra mile in service BECAUSE they are women. This can lead to a whole lot of misunderstandings between them, male workers, and customers for sure.

 

Of course, us guys make up the bulk of the construction industry and are expected to work harder because we are men, so the disparities work both ways.

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