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Practice/repetition


easyguy

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It's been months since I've logged onto or even visited eNotAlone, but this is an appropriate time for me to do so, since I am quickly going through a social transition and want to share my thoughts on improving conversation skills.

 

Without sounding like someone of authority (because I do not have a massive amount of socializing experience), I can highly suggest that if you want to feel more comfortable conversing with people, you need to put yourself into situations where you don't have a choice but to converse. For instance, next month I will be in New York City for nearly a month. I will probably meet more people during that trip than I have ever had conversations with here in my home town (other side of the country). I'll be staying with people I hardly know, only for a few days at a time.

 

I mean, sure, if you were in my shoes, you could theoretically make it through the whole trip without getting to know anyone on any level, but community is a fascinating thing if you begin to nourish it. It gives you more perspective on your own life and the conditions you are under. If you use rehearsed lines and whatnot, you aren't exactly investing any genuine interest in that person, even if it isn't someone significant in your life. Nothing may come of what you are harvesting for one person, or the next. In fact, you may never see him/her ever again, but you learn something about yourself every time you learn something about someone else.

 

It's just like other skills. Talking to people, especially completely random people, takes practice. I don't claim to have mastered the art of conversation skills, but from what I have already learned, there really isn't any secret... just growing from mistakes and bad habits.

 

That's all.

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I think this is good advice but also overthinking it a bit. I prefer to just let loose, do what I want, and just sort of go with the flow. I will randomly say things to strangers if I feel like it or crack jokes around people if in the mood. I'll also just say nothing.

 

Seems to me like sometimes when people think about it too much, until they have the "perfect" plan, they just don't take action.

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