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When/How does it change?


Shinobie

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I just turned 22 and its the same as it has always been and I don't think I've ever attracted a single girl. Me and my friends are all grown up but like every single of one of them is married now or in a relationship.Even guys that see women as sex objects have girlfriends,treat them badly, or ones that have had gotten a girl pregnant still have a relationship. These types of guys attract women and I just dont get it. So basically everyone around me seems to have a girlfriend. People say beauty is in the eye of the beholder but I just dont believe that.

I'm shy but also in the past I have been given subtle hints or straight out been told that I was ugly. How the heck does one attract someone if they are ugly? I just don't see it happening any time soon. My friend back in the past used to just say something to a girl and they would smile and giggle. Like this one girl that was a cashier at a clothing store. He just walked up to buy something and said a couple of things and she seemed to get all nervous and started smiling. This girl and the other ones were really attractive as well. So how does he do it? A lot of people think hes really good looking so is that it? Because he didn't really say much to these girls in the past. I just wish things would change and don't see how they will if I'm shy(which I know i can fix) but I'm probably also ugly which I can't fix.

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The nice thing about being a guy is that this can work out for you. Girls dont fall in love, or like a guy for looks....sure it will get you in the door, but i know plenty of good looking guys who have no success with chicks. Its about confidence, personality, so on. Looks is definitely needed for the intial attraction, i mean it makes it easuer......you cant be that ugly, you must be attractive in some ways, if your face isnt the best, go to the gym and get an amazing body.....and spend your time at the pool or beach getting chicks.

YOu need to work with what you got.......if the looks arent there you need to get great clothes, get a cool confident style, and keep yourself clean and put together.

DOnt show them that your unconfident, dont be, its a turn off, you need to have full confidence in yourself, cause your capable of it. WOrk on that.

Also if your successful they will dig that too, get a good career, something you love to do, woman want a guy who has his own interests and drive in life, lets them know you will continue to succeed and prosper with or with out them. JUst work on all that "life" stuff, improve yourself mentally and physically.

It doesnt matter who you are, THE ugliest guy in the world....could have a great body, great lifestyle, big paycheck, and loads of confidence...and do well with anychick.

But you dont need all this anyway....just keep swinging the bat, youll hit a homer sooon enough, if ya keep at it

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(1) I'm 24 in a few months and am still single, plus a ton of my friends of whom some are even over 30 (both male and female)... So, your statement is WRONG...

 

(2) Like attracts like, not all girls are angels and not "all the other guys" are evil demons of some sort... Again, your statement is WRONG...

 

(3) I first tried to do such things when I had no confidence at all, guess what? - they turned me down... It takes a lot of training and getting to know people in order to feel the 'vibe', so that you can say the right things in the right places, plus be as fine with yourself as possible, in the end you'll be suprised about how easy it actually is... Train hard!!!

 

(4) I was told at school that I'm ugly and stupid - it's funny, because those who told it were expelled from school due to their low grades and are invisible to girls - never seen them with any, lol... Do what you feel - if you feel like getting a new haircut or something - do it, if you feel like getting new clothes - get em, etc - that's what makes someone stand out...

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if you think your looks make you lose out, find something about yourself that you know sticks out. are you good at making jokes? can you make people laugh? are you extremely smart? are you very artsy? gotta bring something out along with confidence, then you will get noticed more. also, to me, it doesn't sound like you make many moves on women because of this. gotta fix that.

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I don't really like the word ugly. I think eveyone is attractive to someone.

 

Oh really? ...

 

But rather than sorta debate everyone I'll just say I know what that feeling is like. Let me guess, you don't think you're ugly (or say used to when you still had self-confidence) but just the lack of any attraction/positive signs at all has you thinking there's something about how you look - same here. And a couple of my friends "just have it" too in the same way. A few words and something is already there. Maybe nothing to actually get anywhere but still positive start nonetheless.

 

I still think confidence is over-rated. Sure you need it, but a bit like shyness unless it's really obvious (I used to think I was but I've seen what "obvious" really is now) then they don't know that. They don't know what job you have, they don't know if you drive a car, whatever.

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