Why do some girls turn it off like a switch???

[Jonathan_in_fl1607306450]

I wil try not to bore you with the details ...if you are interested you can read my postings from earlier this week. I am trying to move past the breakup with the love of my life. I am wondering how we could go from living together one day to back to her ex the next day. I think I need to rationalize this before I can start to heal. How can women do this?? I couldnt hurt someone like that. At least I would have the respect to wait a week or two.

[mermayd]

you are right, a period of time is important for the healing process in all cases involved. I am sorry that you have been hurt so. Heartbreak is so difficult. There could be a few reasons that she has made the decision that she has. She may have thought that the relationship was no longer alive long before it actually had ended. Maybe her needs were not being fufilled and she may have failed to express that. Another possibility is that she may have the need to be in the comfort of someone at all times. She may be insecure within herself and feel that being with anyone is better than being alone. There are other possibilities, I am sure. These are a few that come to mind at the moment and are most likely or popular. I havebeen in this boat. I am sorry that you have to suffer. Remember that there are bright days ahead and that everything happens for a reason even if we do not realize the reason at the time, we will understand sometime in the future.

[JustAnotherFriend]

Jonathan, I have felt the exact same thing and I know how much it hurts. I was filled with rage those days when I got to know how casually my ex had moved on with someone else while I didnt even want to live anymore because of him. Now after so many years when I think of it , it seems like the best thing that could have happened. Isnt it great that you are no longer with the kind of person who could hurt you so deeply, who cant even be loyal and honest with you? So whatever pain it is that you are going through right now is definitely for the better.

Regards,

JustAnotherFriend

[Gerhard]

Hey man, hope you're feeling ok. I went through exactly the same situation although we didn't live together. She dumped me via email, and that was also because of her ex. There's nothing I can say to you to make you feel better or to make you except it in record time. No matter how bad you feel now, time will heal !! It took me 6 months before the anger subdued, I'm still struggling with the hurt a bit. Making radical changes in life style does wonders. Taking up a new sport or hobby fanatically takes your mind away from things. Try to be among friends or family members who love and respect you. Every little thing you do to forget and move on, brings you closer to exceptance. Keep on posting here, just knowing that other people care enough to answer makes a person feel good, Good luck !!

[sergio]

Amen! i agree with what the guys inthe previous 3 posts said. 2 traits which are so common: first they tell you the proverbial ' we can just be friends' then next second they move on like the years never passed, the promises never made, the love never given, the life never shared. One day you're the man of their life and the next you're an acquaintence. yes yes some say that it had been happening for long..so thats real fine, they expect us to care and ask whats wrong..and then when something is wrong on their side they just give subtle hints which the average guy would not even notice. Move on man! be drastic! no half way measures, if it hurts you so much , get her out of your life for good. Hope is last to die, but would you trust her after something like this even if she came back? wouldn't the second time be worse?? i gave a second chance and it was worse. in these situations don't get blinded by love, but act selfish think of yourself first...unless you wanna hurt bad that is