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How does Scorpio apologize
How does Scorpio apologize

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Hi ENA,

 

My BF and I broke up. I had said some really mean things to him in the heat of anger. I have texted him several apologies. He won't even acknowledge them. What kind of person does that? I would hope he would just say - thanks for the apology. But I am getting no response at all. After 3 years together and knowing eachother for at least 10 I would think I would get some response. Its killing me that he won't answer. I am getting obsessed about it.

 

Guys - can any of you tell me why you would ignore an apology from your girlfriend after an argument?

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Who dumped whom? If he hasn't forgiven you for the break-up, he might not want to accept your apologies for other things either. ESPECIALLY if you said "I'll never leave you".

 

Another thing I noticed, you said "would you guys accept an apology from your girlfriend". If I read your post correctly, you AREN'T his girlfriend anymore, so why would he accept an apology LIKE YOU WERE?

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Hi ENA,

 

My BF and I broke up. I had said some really mean things to him in the heat of anger. I have texted him several apologies. He won't even acknowledge them. What kind of person does that? I would hope he would just say - thanks for the apology. But I am getting no response at all. After 3 years together and knowing eachother for at least 10 I would think I would get some response. Its killing me that he won't answer. I am getting obsessed about it.

 

Guys - can any of you tell me why you would ignore an apology from your girlfriend after an argument?

 

It really depends on what was said. I won't accept an apology until I have truly forgiven.

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Who dumped whom? If he hasn't forgiven you for the break-up, he might not want to accept your apologies for other things either. ESPECIALLY if you said "I'll never leave you".

 

Another thing I noticed, you said "would you guys accept an apology from your girlfriend". If I read your post correctly, you AREN'T his girlfriend anymore, so why would he accept an apology LIKE YOU WERE?

 

Its a long story but I broke it off with him because I didn't want him to do it first. We were dating for over 3 years until a few days ago. So techinically i'm not his GF anymore if we broke up but I would like to think the relationship meant something.

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A text is not the right way to apologize. How much feeling can you put into a text?

 

Leave him be. It sounds like you want to apologize to ease your feelings not his anyways. If he chooses to forgive you it will be for him and not you. If you cannot do it in person then write him an old fashioned letter in your own hand writing. Put your heart and soul into it and mail it to him.

No one should ever apologize with the expectation of getting something in return. We apologize because we said or did something we regret and want to make it right.

 

Lost

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maybe because it's dunzo?

 

relax... it hurts like hell but you won't gain respect from them ever again if you act like a psycho.

 

 

I feel like I am acting a little psycho. I texted him 2 apologies. One at 7:30 this morning and one at 1pm.

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A text is not the right way to apologize. How much feeling can you put into a text?

 

Leave him be. It sounds like you want to apologize to ease your feelings not his anyways. If he chooses to forgive you it will be for him and not you. If you cannot do it in person then write him an old fashioned letter in your own hand writing. Put your heart and soul into it and mail it to him.

No one should ever apologize with the expectation of getting something in return. We apologize because we said or did something we regret and want to make it right.

 

Lost

 

Maybe I will write a letter. I apologized both because I did something I regret but also I was hoping to salvage the relationship. I guess thats not going to happen.

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Preemptive breakup? You wouldn't be really young would you?

 

Lost

 

Yes it was a preemptive breakup! And no - I am 40. Its immature yes, but also I had a past BF that broke up with me completely out of the blue and devastated me. The shock of it put me in the hospital. I guess I like to be in control ever since that one.

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When you apologised did you tell him you want him back?

 

No I didn't. I just said that I was sorry and that I hoped in the future he could find it in his heart to forgive me. I also said that I hoped whenever he thought of me, he thought of me as a decent person with some problems instead of as an absolute b****. I also said that I had a lot of good times with him and that it was ok if he never talked to me again but I wanted to apologize and also forgive myself the mistake I made so that it wouldn't eat at me forever.

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Your apology was all about you - him forgiving you, you forgiving you and how you feel. There was nothing about how he feels because of what you said and did.

 

If you want him back - now is the time to tell him that.

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Well what you did obviously was a bad idea. Write the letter and tell him you screwed up big time. Tell him what you have told us why you did it. He may not respond or he might call you up and want to talk.

 

Either way you have some issues to work out. You are punishing him because of an old experience. Is that fair to either of you? You can't live like that.

 

Lost

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Its a long story but I broke it off with him because I didn't want him to do it first. We were dating for over 3 years until a few days ago. So techinically i'm not his GF anymore if we broke up but I would like to think the relationship meant something.

He would like to think so too, but his logic is, if you broke all your promises, that it didn't mean anything to you, therefore it shouldn't mean anything to him either. So he's making it not mean anything, based on what you did.

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Your apology was all about you - him forgiving you, you forgiving you and how you feel. There was nothing about how he feels because of what you said and did.

 

If you want him back - now is the time to tell him that.

 

 

You are right. It was about me. I have been so self centered through this whole thing. I am going to write him a letter and make it about him. And then he can decide if he wants ME back! Thanks for helping me see the light.

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