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Can't read him


bebeblondie

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So i've known this guy for almost a year now, we very rarely hang out. Anyway we saw each other last Saturday night and he told me that Wed was his birthday. So anyway last night i remembered that he had told me this and i texted him "just remembered...happy birthday" and he replied right away saying "thank you very very much" and that was it. Anyway we have been very casual (light texting here and there and have seen each other 5 or 6 times) no sex but a lot of making out and thats it. My question is if he was truly interested in me when i had texted him "happy birthday" wouldn't that be the perfect opportunity to ask to see me again? I know he's shy but there are things he's done in the past that tell me he's not that shy.

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Happy Birthday is something you can say to anyone not just someone you are interested in - so I would not blame him for not picking up on that.

 

But if you had said "Happy Birthday - let me take you out for a drink to celebrate" then your interest would have been more apparent.

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he had a whole year to ask you to see him again. you run into him and he talks. he's not that into you.

 

is drinkin involved when you see him?

 

We didn't run into each other, we had planned to see each other that night.

 

But yea there has been light drinking involved.

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it just seems like you don't have much to say. after a year of knowing someone at steady seeing them, i'd know them really well. and if i was really into them for dating purposes, they'd be my gf by then. within 1.5 months to be honest.

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I would have to agree with ghost69, normally I would say that maybe he does not want to ruin the friendship. But since you said that there has been "lot of making out..." it does not seem he thinking about ruining anything.

 

If you want my advise there are two things you can do: The first being walk away and move on. The second option is to gamble and put how you feel out on the table and see if he feels the same way. But it sounds to me that he is not interested. Just my two cents.

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Why have you not had sex?

 

Not that it's a bad thing, I'm just wondering whether it was a mutual agreement, or just refusal on your part.

 

If it was a continuous refusal on your part, then maybe he was just looking to have some fun, & since you never gave in, he gave up.

 

I think you should just move on & forget about this guy. If he hasn't made any effort to get to know you better, I don't see why you're so interested.

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I think that there is too little information to say whether this guy is not interested because much depends on the dynamic between them. Although they have made out he is shy - and it is possible that for some reason he got the impression she doesn't want anything more.

 

The most effective way to find out what someone wants is to ask - or in this case, ask him out.

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I think that there is too little information to say whether this guy is not interested because much depends on the dynamic between them. Although they have made out he is shy - and it is possible that for some reason he got the impression she doesn't want anything more.

 

The most effective way to find out what someone wants is to ask - or in this case, ask him out.

 

i think there is plenty of information. the only info i needed is:

 

it's been a year.

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The problem as I see it on here is that so often people assume that everyone else is like them - and because they would have done something they assume that someone else will for the same motives, out of the same confidence or because the situation is similar to one in which they found themselves in the past.

 

But in a year - much can happen. Signals can be mixed or misinterpreted by one person or another. And when someone posts on here about a third party we can only asses that third party though someone else's eyes - we can't see their side of any issues, we can't ask questions of them - all we have to go on after one year of interaction between them is a few lines of text.

 

I believe the risks of being wrong in this case are too high to make assertions about what this guy feels. And that is why I advise that the OP ask him directly, or indirectly but assertively, by asking him out. It may well be he isn't interested in anything more but there is no way anyone can be absolutely certain of that

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I am Forget This Day Your Birthday ...
I am Forget This Day Your Birthday ❤️😘

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