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what if gf blackmails me with pregnancy?


bluesky600
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hi so my gf and i had unprotected sex for the first time less than 2 weeks ago. i didnt cum and sex wasn't long because i felt uncomfortable doing it without a condom. she has since been telling me she's tired, moody, back gets sore, and breasts gotten a bit bigger. these are all signs of pregnancy but can also mean she's getting her period soon. when i asked her when she gets her period she tells me she doesn't know, which is odd because how can a 23 yo not know things like this...?

 

we been dating almost 4 months and im slowly starting feel she's not the one for me. she asked me once what if she gets pregnant and she told me she would not get abortion. i feel that she has sensed that i dont wanna stay with her so she will use the pregnancy trick to force me to stay with her.

 

the reason i dont wanna stay with her is because she has lied to me about another guy and she doesn't want our relationship public in her social networks.

 

please advice. i've been a very caring bf but the fact that she lied to me makes me not want to pursue a relationship with her anymore. she also likes to go clubbing alot which is something i dislike very much. the club scene in my city is nasty. all those lonely pervs go to clubs wanting to score with girls.

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Just because you didn't climax doesn't mean you can not get her pregnant with unprotected sex. Why didn't you use a condom? Irresponsible.. Very irresponsible.

 

You both have some issues to deal with, and if neither of you are willing to work on it................

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Just because you didn't climax doesn't mean you can not get her pregnant with unprotected sex. Why didn't you use a condom? Irresponsible.. Very irresponsible.

 

You both have some issues to deal with, and if neither of you are willing to work on it................

 

i know that. rookie mistake. i didnt have a condom at the time but i know it isnt an excuse. i also periodically wiped off pre-cum with my hand during sex but i know there's always a chance, even with a condom.

 

im willing to work on it, but if she just wants to use me monetarily i need to protect myself. any suggestions are welcome.

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If you're the father, you're obligated by law to support the child. If there's any doubt as to the paternity of the child, you and the child need to be tested. Of course, that's IF she's pregnant.

 

if it comes to that a dna test is a must. worse case scenario i can convince her to get abortion.

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normally signs of pregnancy aren't noticeable until almost a month after conception.. it's very possible she might be pregnant, pregnancy tests don't show accurate results until after a missed period.. i think she's just wanting attention right now.. even if she blackmails you with pregnancy, you still have the right to leave. you'll have to pay child support and probably help with the baby's care, but you don't have to remain with this chick for any reason. and staying with someone -just- because you have a child with them, is a bad reason.. it makes for a very unhealthy relationship.

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If you don't want to be with her stop having sex with her, and certainly don't have unprotected sex with her. Sure, she should be getting some symptoms if she is pregnant, but some of those symptoms don't appear for some time...

 

Just walk away, dude, and if she does turn out to be pregnant, then deal with it then. If you don't feel that you should be with her, then don't stay with her just because she might be pregnant.

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but if she just wants to use me monetarily i need to protect myself. any suggestions are welcome.

 

There is no "protection" for you if she is pregnant with your baby. If she does have your child, you will be paying a percentage of your wages in child support for the next 18 years.

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There shouldn't be any convincing her to abort. Even if she is blackmailing you, you still shouldn't take that stance. Wear a condom always and wait to worry till you find out for sure if she's pregnant.

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thnx for the input. we're the same age. when we had unprotected sex things are ok. i also was with her because i told myself maybe i was being unreasonable. she told me she only goes to clubbing with her girlfriends to a club that isnt infested with pervs, and she also never drinks any alcohol. so i eased up a little on that matter.

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i also periodically wiped off pre-cum with my hand during sex but i know there's always a chance,

Wiping off pre-cum is going to make absolutely no difference at all. There's always going to be a good chance that she falls pregnant because there are always traces of sperm in pre-cum. You were BOTH being very irresponsible. If you aren't ready to be parents, then use birth control AND condoms at all times.

 

That said, I can't imagine why she would want to blackmail you. The only reason I can come up with is if she is already pregnant by another guy and is hoping to make you believe the baby is actually yours.

 

Other than that, I can only suggest you wait and see if she really is pregnant, and if she is, then make sure you get a paternity test. If it's yours, then you take on the responsibility of helping to raise it.

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Hope for the best- that she is not pregnant.

 

Until you have any real proof/indication that she is, ignore the attention-seeking comments about sore boobs. Don't feed into it.

 

If she turned out to be pregnant and had a baby- you'd need a paternity test ASAP- and if it was indeed your child then you should do the right thing seeing that you helped create it.

 

But that is jumping WAY ahead. So just hope for the best for now and learn from your mistakes. It's all you can do at the moment.

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I'm 23 and I couldn't tell you when my period would be. And I've been having them since I was 11.

 

Not everyone is clock work. I can go from 28 days up to 4 months... And it gets longer and longer.

 

But if shes not the "one" why have unprotected sex with a girl thats not wanting to have an abortion?

 

Is she on the pill?

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