Popular excuses by those who cheat

[theantibarbie23]

 

Now I know that i'm going to get some flack from this post, but EVERYONE has it in them to be a cheater. Put that person in the right circumstances with the right person and it CAN Happen!

 

Never say Never!

I am going to call BS on this defunct logic. It reminds me of the argument that everyone is capable of murder yet there are people out there that are such passivists that they wouldn't even defend themselves if it was the only way to save their own lives or families.

 

Some people wouldn't go through with having an affair under any set of circumstances. I know I wouldn't. Due to the trauma my entire family endured thanks to my father's infidelities, I would much rather put a gun to my own head than follow in his footsteps. Seriously.

 

I have heard phrases like this before and it's pretty much spoken out of a need for validation. "Everyone would do XYZ (just like I did) under the right circumstances." However, that simply isn't the truth.

[Oldboy]

Don't forget the old "I love you but I'm not in love with you" or "I've found my soulmate", "It just happened" "I wasn't happy in the relationship" etc.... Reasons? Excuses more like.

 

Here are a couple of "Reasons"

 

For the ladies.. "I couldn't keep my legs shut"

 

For the gents... "I couldn't keep it in my pants"

[BrokenWingedFaery]

My ex bf was with another grrrl for two months while he and I were together. I found out shortly after I found out he had a wife (it was LD). So I confront him and he says:

 

"She never meant anything to me"....I asked which she. And he never responded.

[Goincrazy]

"My eyes were closed so I wasn't aware of the situation."

"I was the victim!"

"I slept with two girls; thereforeeee, they cancel eachother out."

[yeawutever]

"My eyes were closed so I wasn't aware of the situation."

"I was the victim!"

"I slept with two girls; thereforeeee, they cancel eachother out."

 

The victim?? Mmmm, so you were LOL, RAPED I suppost??

 

 

 

[Goincrazy]

Yes??? lol

[mia1207]

Before everyone classifies us cheaters as the Scum of the earth, I think it's important to realize how the world works and how not everything is black and white.

 

When I was 15 years old, I thought I would get married, have kids and live happily ever after.....Unfortunately I found out life is not like that!

 

Now I know that i'm going to get some flack from this post, but EVERYONE has it in them to be a cheater. Put that person in the right circumstances with the right person and it CAN Happen!

 

Never say Never!

 

 

The temptation will be there and no one is immune from it, but acting on the temptation is what draws the line between honest, caring, loving SOs and selfish, lying, uncaring bastards. All you have to do is breakup with the other person you are seeing first or at least talk to him or her, take a break, ANYTHING but cheating!!!

 

As far as excuses, I've heard them all from my current cheating ex. From "It just happenned" to "I was not satisfied, so I had to go elsewhere" to "It was destiny."

 

Responsibility is the key here Mike. And please do not give me the old "I'm human, I made a mistake" excuse. We are all humans, but it takes a whole lot of " physical labor" to make such "mistakes."

[metrogirl]

how much "head" is enough "head"??? HAHA

[Girlygirl2007]

I am going to call BS on this defunct logic. It reminds me of the argument that everyone is capable of murder yet there are people out there that are such passivists that they wouldn't even defend themselves if it was the only way to save their own lives or families.

 

Some people wouldn't go through with having an affair under any set of circumstances. I know I wouldn't. Due to the trauma my entire family endured thanks to my father's infidelities, I would much rather put a gun to my own head than follow in his footsteps. Seriously.

 

I have heard phrases like this before and it's pretty much spoken out of a need for validation. "Everyone would do XYZ (just like I did) under the right circumstances." However, that simply isn't the truth.

 

I used to feel this way, too. 7 years of marriage and 2 kids later (and a father who broke up her family through infidelity), I came VERY CLOSE to breaking up my marriage because I got emotionally involved with someone else. It is really important to never say never, because you will face many temptations in life.

 

This is coming from someone who is very strong in her beliefs about what is right and what is wrong. I might get flamed for saying this, but remember that life is difficult and you never know when you'll get thrown a curve ball. Sometimes, even the strongest of us fail.

[mia1207]

I always dig "I didn't plan it" or "I didn't mean to hurt you" cause apparently thats supposed to make you feel better.

 

Oh, well it was an accident then...forget it! No harm, no foul.

 

If I ever cause a car crash and used that as my defense, I'm fairly certain I'll still do time.

 

 

Love that one too moleculo

[mrmaximum]

My dad's excuse was "your mother can be mean." The heck is that?? I know my mom is no walk in the park sometimes but still, give me a break? His advice to me one day (and I'm not making this up!!) "Don't get caught, it hurts the ones you love!"

Whatever. Lots of good points on this thread. Yes we all want the flashy people when we are younger, but think about it, what kind of people do others settle down with? The qualities that make that 'bad' guy or girl a cool bf or gf also are the same ones that usually make very bad life partners, yeah?

As for cheating, it's proven there are people that go through hell and back with their spouses and STILL don't cheat. So as to never say never, I don't know your situation and this isn't a dig, but the two posters who have said this have both been cheaters. I work in a club, I could get away with it, there are women (hot young women) who make passes at me all the time. I could get away with it, SCOTT FREE, the wife would have NO idea whatsoever. I'm just not willing make a compromise in that fashion.

[treefrogkate]

While that may be true for some women, from what I've observed, even if a nice guy is "hot" looking, he's still likely to get cheated on the moment an even better looking "bad boy" comes along. (Although it's a fictional story, the movie, link removed, provides a perfect illustration of what I mean.) By contrast, even if a "bad boy" isn't hot looking, the woman he's with will be loyal to him no matter how many hot looking "nice guys" come her way. Again, I know there are exceptions, but that does appear to be the general rule.

 

 

No, men want to be coupled with a great looking partner. Women (generally speaking) want to be coupled with a great looking jerk. Sorry, just calling it like I see it.

 

I think you're making a gross exaggeration here.

 

I must be the only woman in existence that wanted someone who is a genuinely nice guy then (but somehow I doubt it). I got one, and he is absolutely wonderful. He also wouldn't fit most peoples' expectations of "hot" with his chubby beer belly and nerdy tendencies, but he couldn't be more perfect for me, and I couldn't be happier. Am I going to cheat on him with anyone, let alone someone who's a jerk? Hells no. You couldn't pay me enough to do that to the man I love.

 

I really think you have it all wrong. Girls think they want a bad boy. Women have already decided that it's not worth it and want someone they can depend on.

 

You shouldn't blame women for the bad behavior of these girls.

[mrmaximum]

2600degress, I really wonder what your angle is. I guess because I am still somewhat new to this whole forum thing that I'm not sure what a true flame is. I didn't think I was actually, I didn't mean it as a dig, if that is how you or Girly took it, then I do aplogize. I was merely responding to another poster who had mentioned that if the timing was right EVERYONE would do it. As I said, I could, I don't, end of story. On the other hand I have been looking on other parts of this forum and I really am not sure where you are coming from.

Your story is tragic, to be sure, you didn't deserve to be treated that way, I'll be the first to admit that. Not only that, I will concede that we can read a story and think what we like but living it is a completely different matter. However, you chose your course of action and you must know by now how people feel about that. There where other choices that you could have taken and you did what you thought was best for you. Okay, so I'll give you that, however, you go on and on about how jilted spouses rage on about their WS or cheating xbf or xgf and you have to realize that what they went through wasn't pleasant whatsoever. Sometimes some of these people had no clue what was going on and there was nothing they could do to stop it (my fiancee was with a serial cheater for example). To expect anyting else is like being a known pedophile and going to a PTA meeting and then be surprised that they ask you to leave.

As I said before, I haven't been in your shoes and I won't judge you on that, but you haven't been in some of the others here either and we can tell you that being on the other side really sucks!!

You bought the Ferrari man, why are you complaining about the mileage now? It's one or the other, it isn't both.

[Rabican]

Hey, when you figure out why women are only faithful to the "bad boys", PLEASE let me know.

 

Every serious girlfriend I've ever had has told me at some point that I treated them better than anyone else ever has... but all those relationships ended with my girlfriend cheating on me, too! I can't explain that at all.

 

I think it comes down to that simple situation where you want what you cant have. The nice guy, hes an easy catch. Once a girl lands the 'nice guy' shes pretty much got him, hook line and sinker. so the chase is over, the hard work is done. The 'bad boy' is always a work in progress, you never really 'win' the bad boy. So the chase never ends. Thus you always want what you cant have, the bad boy converted into the nice guy. But it never happens. So you settle for the nice guy, get bored with us, and then cheat... then you wonder why so many guys are

*&%$'s

[CallingAllAngels]

OMG!!!!!! This was the EXACT excuse my husband gave me...word for word!

 

 

 

 

How about:

 

"it meant nothing, you are the only person who is important to me"

 

in other words

 

"i cant think of a good excuse so ill just claim that it meant nothing because that will make my situation so much better and stop you from screaming at me"