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Is this normal for friends, or is it more?


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I use to come on here all the time when I had a broken heart over a year ago and got some of the best help, so I'm back... to see if someone can un-confuse me

 

My friend of over 10 years and I hang out all the time, over the last year I've been single its been more and more... I started developing strong feelings for him so I kept myself away for a lil bit to stop liking him since I wasn't sure he wanted the same. Well the other day, I decided to txt him... He replied right away and we made plans to go out for dinner the next day. We went out for dinner, he paid, opened the door, was just incredibly sweet - felt like we were on a date. So we go to my place for a bit and hang out, then we go to his place where he is being very sweet again, we sit on the couch together and we end up cuddling and 'spooing' on the couch, falling asleep... he's rubbing my leg a bit and then we both wake up in the middle of the night and go to his bed, I complain my back hurts and he gives me a massage with lotion so my top is off... - So normal for friends???? Nothing like this has even happened between us... My feelings are coming back and I'm just wondering what the heck I should do!? I want to just take it day by day and see where it goes but at the same time, I want him so bad.

 

I have no idea what to do. help!

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That is definetely not what friends do! I can't ever imagine me doing that to any of my friends I don't have an interest in...

 

I think he might like you...The fact that you did let it go that far means those feelings never really went away by the way.

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Ok, definitely not normal for friends at all. However, if you want to be in a romantic relationship with him, go with your gut instincts and ask him out. Maybe he feels the same way about you too. If you just not ask him about being in a relationship with you, you may never get the same opportunity again.

 

Good Luck with this

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The thought crossed my mind that he could just be looking for a booty call, but I think he would have tried more than just a back massage, cuddling and buying dinner, lol.. or maybe that's just the start. Either way, I hope he does like me. I've never told him I like him, its always been a secret becasue I'm a big chicken and don't want to ruin our friendship if he is not interested but with what happened the other night I was thinking, ya I don't do this with my other male friends!!!

 

Should I wait for him to make the move and just take it slow though?

 

Eeeep, I hope it works out... thank you!

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The thought crossed my mind that he could just be looking for a booty call, but I think he would have tried more than just a back massage, cuddling and buying dinner

 

I would also think that after 10 years of friendship that would be incredibly inappropriate. Yes, friends do end up sleeping together, but I think more often than not that's more spur of the moment rather than all the things you've mentioned that make it appear he likes you.

 

IMO, it sounds like you two are already dating and you might as well see if he feels the same way you do!

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The thought crossed my mind that he could just be looking for a booty call, but I think he would have tried more than just a back massage, cuddling and buying dinner, lol.. or maybe that's just the start. Either way, I hope he does like me. I've never told him I like him, its always been a secret becasue I'm a big chicken and don't want to ruin our friendship if he is not interested but with what happened the other night I was thinking, ya I don't do this with my other male friends!!!

 

Should I wait for him to make the move and just take it slow though?

 

Eeeep, I hope it works out... thank you!

 

He's been your friend for 10 years, I highly doubt he is looking for a booty call. I think he really cares for you, and you should make your next move based on his personality. Some guys, like me, have trouble reading a girl, so if she doesn't show interest, I'll slowly push myself away. Other guys are go getters. They'll let you know how they feel about you and make their move.

 

 

All in all, there is no doubt in my mind he is attracted to you, and probably wants to be more than friends. Don't let him slip away, and don't play any games; most guys hate that. You should start hanging out with him more and show him you're interested in him. If you do this, and the feelings are mutual, you'll eventually reach a new level in you relationship.

 

Good luck!=D

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Thanks everyone! I'm just terrifed to say anything to him since we've known eachother for so long - I'll try showing it more. Deep down, I know its not a booty call, he would never do that to me but your mind thinks weird things when you like someone .... hehe

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OP, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

 

Get him alone, and tell him how you feel. The way i see it, it's a toss up between these things:

 

- you tell him, he feels the same way, and you and he have a relationship

 

- you tell him, he doesn't feel the same way, but he respects your openness and honesty and it's something both of you move on from.

 

- you don't tell him, he gets an SO, and you spend time to yourself thinking "what if?"

 

The third option would, IMO, be a killer since it's bad to hold regrets. I recently was faced with option 2, since i developed a crush on a woman i became friendly with. I guess the reason i told her was to avoid option 3 in my list, since she and I have a lot in common and I reckon could have had a good relationship, if she felt the same way.

 

Good luck in your choice, and hopefully it's one of options 1 and 2.

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