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How can someone walk straight into a new relationship after 4 yrs


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I dont understand it.Its not even a month and my ex has a new girlfriend.We have been living together for 2 years and it was a very painful breakup. I dont know how someone would even have the head space for a new realtionship.Its so bizarre to me.

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I dont understand it.Its not even a month and my ex has a new girlfriend.We have been living together for 2 years and it was a very painful breakup. I dont know how someone would even have the head space for a new realtionship.Its so bizarre to me.

 

how long have you two been broken up?

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This is common. Your ex likely knew they were going to break up with you for some time.

 

He had time to think about it, process it, grieve over it, and get over it before you even knew it was coming.

 

Odds are his relationship won't work out (but you never know). Regardless, your focus should be on yourself and how to heal, not on him and what he is doing.

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I dont understand it.Its not even a month and my ex has a new girlfriend.We have been living together for 2 years and it was a very painful breakup. I dont know how someone would even have the head space for a new realtionship.Its so bizarre to me.

 

Mine is married after ~8 months...she left our R and went into this one...we were together 8 yrs. All I can say is I cant imagine its a very healthy way to do things. She hooked up with someone that did the same thing fresh out of his divorce so maybe they are very compatible lol.

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This is common. Your ex likely knew they were going to break up with you for some time.

 

He had time to think about it, process it, grieve over it, and get over it before you even knew it was coming.

 

Odds are his relationship won't work out (but you never know). Regardless, your focus should be on yourself and how to heal, not on him and what he is doing.

 

exactly my ex's case. 2 -almost- years together, and he jumped into a new relationship right after we broke up. in fact, he was seeing her during our relationship. and he's still together with her for a year now.....so, hey, his relationship might work out.

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This is how I started with my bf. We were both coming out of long-term relationships and met each other within a month of our breakups. We are good together and have been together many years. If it didn't work out, you need to find the one that does. It's all in your attitude. I hate mourning for something that was flawed, so I don't.

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My only guess is what was said. They decided to leave the relationship long before you knew, and when another person started making them feel good (and they were attracted to them).. They jumped into a relationship. Not healthy but everyone is different. What was love for one, wasn't for another. The pain of love. It is confusing and you will never have answers. Treat yourself good, do things for you, you will overcome this. You will find someone better

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This is common. Your ex likely knew they were going to break up with you for some time.

 

He had time to think about it, process it, grieve over it, and get over it before you even knew it was coming.

 

Odds are his relationship won't work out (but you never know). Regardless, your focus should be on yourself and how to heal, not on him and what he is doing.

 

Agreed. I could have done the same with a guy I met a few weeks ago, just a couple weeks after my walking out on a 5 year relationship. I've been over my ex for the most part for a year now.

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More often than not, karma catches up w/ the people who jump right into something else or leave someone for someone else, unless it was an abusive and/or unhealthy relationship they're leaving. Speaking from personal experience here on both accounts...

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I think it is the fact that if you jump into another relationship, then you don't feel the loss from your previous relationship. It actually happened with my ex of 4-1/2 years as well. I think it's more common than not. I don't think it becomes a problem for them unless they either 1) get broken up with 2) start to think back at their past relationships. I do think it then has the potential to harm them. My guess is the blow they will feel, however, will be less than if they took the time to grieve. I'm no expert though. My guess is that the experts say the grieving process is necessary.

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I still don't understand how some people can move on from relationships without so much as a backward glance. On of my ex's walked out of the home we shared together after over two years of supposed happiness. I was heartbroken. He was immediately with a girl more than ten years younger than him, she loved him dearly, but after about 2 years, he suddenly left her and moved onto another. I think there was about two women before me who suffered through his sudden departures. Such a caring, respectful and loving person...right up to the day he leaves. Go figure!

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I need your opinion about my ex getting over me quickly, so here's some info:

 

We were together for 5 years, got engaged 1 year ago. Everything running smoothly (just a few arguments along the way), we never felt the need to make new friends, we ere each other's best friend. Our mental connection was superb, we could talk about everything for hours and hours.

 

2.5 months ago, sadly, her father passed away. I was very supportive, and she would acknowledge it. But then, 1.5 month ago, just 1 month after her father's death, she was looking for a reason to argue, a reason to make me angry, and she did. We had a fight (over a silly thing which was her fault), which she found as a good excuse to break up with me. Out of the blue.

 

Getting straight to the point: the day we broke up, she opened a Facebook account (which she always hated this network), left her profile intentionally unlocked so I could visit her page to check what's she doing, added a BUNCH of new friends on her list, mostly guys, which I never knew that she knew, and the worse part: she uploaded some pictures of her, going to a dance night club, posing as happy as she could, wearing her BEST smile, trying her best to show me what a good time she has after our break up.

 

So, ok, let's say she doesn't give a sh!t about me. What about her father? It was bearly 40 days since her father passed away, and she goes dancing & drinking to the most famous club of the town?

 

Don't know what your culture in the US is, don't know what you would have done. But, in our country, you can't just go have so much fun, 40 days after the death of your most beloved person. What's wrong with her? How did she manage to get so easily over me & her father? I never expected this from her, she was always my cute little girl, shy & polite as you can imagine. Not the type of a woman you'd think as cold, heartless.

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These things happen marcon. People deal with grief and stress in different ways. I would block her facebook account and try to get on with your life without her. She has to get through the process herself and anything you say to her is only going to stem more issues. Also 40 days after a death, you don't need to grieve for someone 24/7. Sometimes you manage to forget about things. I wouldn't look into it. I think you are just trying to rationalize why you think she will come back to you (i.e. she's going through a phase).

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If you're suggesting that I hope she comes back, you're definetely wrong. There is no way I can love her again, she has no moral, she went to have plenty of fun, dancing & drinking, 40 days after her father's death. My God. I can't have feelings for her anymore.

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If you're suggesting that I hope she comes back, you're definetely wrong. There is no way I can love her again, she has no moral, she went to have plenty of fun, dancing & drinking, 40 days after her father's death. My God. I can't have feelings for her anymore.

 

I don't blame you for being upset. Obviously after 5 years, your going to be.

 

However, I don't blame her either. To say she has no moral because she went out dancing and drinking is not fair IMO.

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