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The laws of physics as they apply to getting the girl...


jujigatame
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First law of physics: You could be the kind of man who would climb Mount Everest while simultaneously finding a cure for AIDS, uniting North and South Korea via sattelite webcam broadcast, and defusing a nuclear bomb set to turn the entire Asian continent into a smoldering crater if you so much as think of cutting the red wire, but the minute your crush walks by, you'll be so dumbfounded as to her every little action that you can literally feel each and every fuse within your brain blow out as your neural circuitry comes grinding to a halt.

 

So, professor, how does this scientific principle affect my life? Simple. I have a crush on this girl. I know that I have a reasonably good-looking body, as well as having plenty of charm, challenge, and confidence up my sleeve. About a week ago I got up the nerve to call her (we're in high school and have a student phone book, so getting her number wasn't an obstacle), and we seemed to hit it off very well. She knew me from various classes over our high school careers, so it wasn't a cold call. Two days later, I call again. She seems excited to hear from me again. Another three days, I call back. Same reaction, and conversation of at least first-date caliber. It would seem from these interactions that she's got her radar pointed in my direction.

 

But here's the thing that I don't get: I pass her in the hallway twice daily. I wave to her, I smile at her, I glance at her in class. No response. It's like she doesn't see me. Once or twice, she briefly - split second - locked eyes with me, then kept walking. (Second law of physics: It's impossible not to see someone who stands six foot eight. I could take up a job as a control tower.) This isn't to say that there's a total lack of interference: Her friends are often with her, she sits at an oblique angle to me in class, and she also seems to be a bit on the shy side. She has very few male acquaintances, which could mean she finds it hard to talk to guys face to face. Finally, in addition to being a walking telephone pole, many friends of mine that share my crush's introversion have told me that they were at first very intimidated by my intelligence and the fact that I'm so extroverted.

 

Or she could just... not like me.

 

Can't be...... I hope....

 

So, people of the internet, cast down your judgment of my situation. Is she just shy, or is she not interested in me? Any other comments or suggestions? Thanks for reading this beast of a post, I know it was long. Much appreciate the effort and eyestrain!

 

-Jujigatame

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Well lets see, Aside from the fact that i enjoyed reading your post, have you tried to talk to her at school? I dont know about your lunch breaks or anything at your school, but try talkin to her at school and see if you get the same reaction. If she shrugs you off, it might me a shyness/insecureness. If so, Id try calling her again and talking to her about it. But thats just my opinion! Good luck!!

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Diggy -

 

Any time I see her is just in passing time, so there's no time for more than just hello. I do have two classes with her, debate and gym (she looks good in sweats but we're currently broken off into groups in both classes. Of course, she's in neither of mine.

 

Either way, I would have a hard time bringing that question to the table directly. I know the only way to find out is to ask her if she wants to do something with me outside of school... (readies the whiny voice...) but that's too hard! Really though, I like to be sure of my odds before I lay my chips on the table. Sigh... Sometimes you can't totally cut down on risk. This is what I get for daydreaming about her and building it up for so freaking long!

 

It's late, I can't get to sleep, and I'm punch drunk. Later.

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From reading your post it is very obvious to me that you are very articulate and intelligent.

 

My opinion on this situation is that you continue to talk to her on the phone and "break her in" to getting to know you. I believe that if she is truly interested like you say she is and she is as enthusiastic when she speaks to you on the phone then it is just a shy/insecure thing on her part.

Have you ever thought that perhaps she thinks the same thing about you and she is afraid that she will mess up saying something to you in person and blow the chance of getting to know you? Set her at ease and take positive steps to talk to her.

Make sure you are reading her right when you talk to her on the phone though... you don't want to be perceived as a "stalker".

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This is just an obvious question, but she does know who you are, right? You did make it clear to her over the phone (descriptions, whatnot) who you are, yes?

 

Something you can try is to ask her over the phone, in a jokingly manner, is whether or not she sees you at school. It'll be an indirect way of confronting her with the fact that she doesn't seem to want to talk to you when she's around other people. Or you can just ask her to have lunch with you one day. It's not really a date, but just a time when you can hang out with her.

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I didn't read the entire post, but did she seem interested in you when you talk to her. Does she look at you when you are talking or does she seem like she is only being polite.

 

Just develop a friendship until it seems like the right time. Have patience. Good things come to those who wait!

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Simulacra - She does indeed know who I am, and did when I started calling her.

 

Overcorrect - No danger of coming off as a stalker. I haven't been tapping her phone line or anything...

 

I guess the best route would be to become friends with her first, like you said, Sisterlynch, which is what I'm doing already. I can really see what it is that girls sometimes like about shy guys; it's like a game with a really great prize at the end!

 

Thanks for all the advice, people! There's no way that anyone but myself can act on or find a definitive answer to this problem, but it's great to get as much help as possible!

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