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How to not get your hopes up


Rosee

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Ok so for the millionth time I've reactivated my online dating profile..I tend to get discouraged after short amounts of time on there and give up.

 

The most annoying thing is I can't help myself getting a bit psyched about certain guys I talk to, especially if they come accross as humorous etc and we have good conversations and I start to read too much into it and then am inevitably disappointed when things don't go anywhere.

 

I would like to be much more detatched about the whole thing but I'm an emotional kind of person (internally I mean, I am good at not showing it) so I don't know how.

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for me, i try not to get attached until we've met in person several times. i never talked long to a man before i'd meet them. most men who are single and genuinely looking to date will ask you out within 1-4 emails. that's my experience. men who take longer to ask you out aren't that interested. if they don't ask you out after 2 weeks or 4 emails of talking, then forget them.

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That's good advice but it's not so much getting attached because I don't know them, but more just I can't help myself thinking "ooh, I might meet someone great" and then when it doesn't happen I feel disillusioned again and it's the continual dashing of hopes, so I want to get to the point where it would just be a nice bonus rather than the most important thing in the world, dunno if that makes sense

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i try not to get my hopes up. when i set up an date with a guy i met online, i look at it as an opportunity to meet someone new, try a new restaurant or bar, and to just get to know someone. i don't view it as 'is he my future husband?' that's just too much pressure.

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i try not to get my hopes up. when i set up an date with a guy i met online, i look at it as an opportunity to meet someone new, try a new restaurant or bar, and to just get to know someone. i don't view it as 'is he my future husband?' that's just too much pressure.

 

Now that is some great advice! I agree totally on that one. At this point I would like to find a guy maybe a few who are into health and fitness so we could go to the gym together and do road trips/adventures...AS FRIENDS! and if it leads to more then kewl and if not then I found a great friend.

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Chatting online can sometimes turn possible future dates into platonic friends before you have even met them..Try and meet up more quickly rather than endless chatting online. if they sound nice and are appealing Take the initiative and ask to meet later that week...It keeps it exciting and you will often find you are regularly meeting someone new regardless if you "click" in real life or not, you only grow from the experience You are still getting dressed up and out of the house and keeping busy and conversing with new people these are all positive things...try it and good luck

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