fatherto2 Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Hiyaaa everyone im a father of two boys. The oldes just wont fully toilet train and its reallystarting to annoy me now. He is 4 years old, 5 in october and is still having mistakes in his pants. he never wets or poos the bed, and never has to be honest. However the problem is, he just wont go to the toilet through the day for a poo. There is times he will be very good and go, but that phases out after a few weeks. i have tried star chars, putting a cheerio in the loo and getting him to wee and poo on it. He has been to see the doctor who referred him to see a pediatrician i think, and have been there twice and there is nothing medically wrong. Often when he does go on his own, he has already started and there is a bit in his pants. Im just at the end of the tether with it all, i get so frustrated and i want to put a stop to it. Ive now started making him clean his own pants hoping this will start to make him get sick of doing it. But then think im wasting my time as he doesnt seem to be bothered by the filth, which is the complete opposite to his younger brother who hates to be dirty. he used to bring a clean nappy when he had a wee or poo. Is there any suggestions at what i can do because its really starting to depress me now, especially with him starting full time school in september. Any help more than appreciated. x Link to comment
NightLily Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Hm, if he doesn't care about the filth then you have to give him a reason to care. You could try a reward system where if he is successful for X number of days he gets something like one of those fruit pops or something. You could also start putting him in time out if he doesn't follow through. Link to comment
sophie274 Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 It sounds like he is just too lazy/unmotivated to get up and go when he needs to go. Do you tell him to go through-out the day and make him go through out the day? The 4 year old I babysat would need suggestions to go, otherwise she would kind of forget. I agree with Suzy about the reward ... maybe something more than stickers, a toy. Link to comment
FarthestEdge Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 I'm curious to see what others have to say about this. I know someone in a similar predicament. The boy HAS the ability, he just lacks the interest. If he is playing or doing something he likes, he just goes in his pants....and keeps on playing. The dad is trying what you are trying-making him clean up after himself. So far, it isn't really changing anything.... Is he technichally motivated? Is his body on a schedule (does he go at regular times)? I'm wondering if a watch with a pre-set alarm to remind him it's time to go might help. It's a novelty....Just at thought.. I wish had more to offer, both for you and my friend. I sympathize with your plight... Link to comment
fatherto2 Posted May 28, 2009 Author Share Posted May 28, 2009 Tried a reward system when he earned 7 stars we would take him to his favourite places. swimming, beach, out in the boat etc. I often remind him to go. sometimes he says no but if i say come on go to the loo and we will get a drink of juice after he will go. Is he technichally motivated? Is his body on a schedule (does he go at regular times)? I'm wondering if a watch with a pre-set alarm to remind him it's time to go might help. It's a novelty....Just at thought.. Answer is yes. he is normally clockwork, so thats a great suggestion having a watch with alarm as he is really interested in watches and clocks. Ive went about this all the wrong way in the past tho. ive made a scene when hes had a mistake "shouted about it" so feel its partially my fault. I just dont see this situation ever ending. i was going to take him camping 2moro night but now feel i should to prove to him doing this doesnt get rewards.???? Link to comment
NightLily Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Hmm.. I would imagine one thing that will get him going is sibling rivalry. If his younger brother gets rewards for cleanliness where as he does not he may step it up a bit. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 I went through the same thing. My son had this..... link removed Link to comment
fatherto2 Posted May 28, 2009 Author Share Posted May 28, 2009 Well guys thanks, its good to just talk and get it out my system. i get so embarrased by it at times. SuzyQ2513 your right, whenever the lil man gets a start the older one has to do the same. metrogirl THANKS, going to look into this Shuttlefish Thanks for the suggestion, Might have the hand held computers cose to the loo Link to comment
metrogirl Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Well guys thanks, its good to just talk and get it out my system. i get so embarrased by it at times. SuzyQ2513 your right, whenever the lil man gets a start the older one has to do the same. metrogirl THANKS, going to look into this Shuttlefish Thanks for the suggestion, Might have the hand held computers cose to the loo Don't be embarrased. I never felt embarrased with my son, I actually felt sad for him because I was often called to the school to bring him a change of clothes and the other kids would make fun of him. Link to comment
thejigsup Posted May 30, 2009 Share Posted May 30, 2009 My son wasn't completely trained until he was almost 6. He's now 21. Hasn't had an accident in years;-) Link to comment
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