chianti Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 I mentioned in a thread a few weeks ago that every single one of my married friends had broken up with their husband/wife at least once before getting married. Thought I'd share a couple of those stories: #1: Buddy of mine dumped his girlfriend of 2+ years summer before starting medical school. Typical GIGS. She was heartbroken and moved to another city 3 hours away. After starting med school he began dating another girl. After 4 months with this new girl he realized how much he missed the ex. Called her a few weeks later. She visited a few weeks after that. They got married 2 years later and now have 2 young kids. #2: This girl I know was moving to Columbus, OH from NYC to start her medical residency. She had met her boyfriend during the 3rd-year of medical school and they had dated for a little over a year when she dumped him, about a month before moving away. Claimed she had doubts about the relationship, espicially with her moving away. Four months later and working her butt of as a medical intern she realized what a huge mistake she had made. Called him up to reconcile. He basically told her to on the phone. A friend of hers told her to "not take no for an answer" and encouraged her to show up at his doorstep. She did exactly that. The relationship was rekindled over the next few months. They will be getting married in 2 months. Both these scenarios were typical GIGS. I think a key point in both of these relationships was that they were both very good relationships, with no real major points of contention. Simply one person had to go through that phase where they question the relationship. Link to comment
vertigoxo Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Very good post, OP. My parents always kept breaking up and getting back together, and now they are married for 19 years. Crazy, huh? Link to comment
chianti Posted May 23, 2009 Author Share Posted May 23, 2009 Thought I'd share another good one: buddy of mine is getting married this summer. About a year into their relationship his g/f dumped him. Stated the old "I don't know what I want." She truly meant it. She wasn't dating anyone else, just had to clear her head. My friend was crushed. Two months later she calls out of the blue and apologizes, 'fesses up to her mistake, and asks for a second chance. Since then they have broken up two more times and have got back together. Wedding is in 6 weeks. Link to comment
brokenheart311 Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Chianti, Thank you for sharing those success stories. My ex is at the same place as the dumpers in your stories, a crossroad in her life and her questioning what it is she wants in life. Like those relationships you mentioned, we had what appeared to be a perfect relationship, minor disagreements that were solved by maturely talking the issue out, not once did we ever have a major fight, nor did we ever go to bed angry. The stories give me hope that things will work themselves out in the long run. Of course to heal myself I'm trying to live my life the way I did before we ever got together. Link to comment
mattyp Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Thx for those stories. But does anyone know any stories where the couple was broken up for a longer time (1 yr plus) and found their way back? Preciate it. Link to comment
chianti Posted May 23, 2009 Author Share Posted May 23, 2009 Yeah, actually I do. Another buddy of mine broke up with his g/f after he started med school and she started law school. They had been together for 3 years in undergrad. First serious relationship for both. He went on to date 2 other girls. One for about 8 months and then the other for 2+ years. Then he dumped the 2+ year girlfriend and got back together with his first girlfriend, after being apart for 3+ years. They were married 3 months later. True story. They have a kid now with another on the way. Weird how things workout sometimes. Link to comment
chianti Posted May 23, 2009 Author Share Posted May 23, 2009 Another one: A guy I became friend with in med school got dumped by his girlfriend the summer before med school. They had dated for over 2 years in undergrad. He was head-over-heels in love with her, wanted to marry her, etc...my buddy was a real "catch" if you will. Good-looking, athletic guy who was a really good person. He was crushed after the break-up. He had no problem meeting girls; in fact, he was basically with a new girl every couple of weeks for the first 2 years of med school. But I could tell he was never quite over the ex. He didn't get into any type of meaningful relationships with any of these new girls. Then a couple of months into our third-year of medical school, completely out of the blue, the ex-girlfriend calls him up and tells him what a huge mistake she had made. They've been married almost 5 years now. Again, the key commonality in all of these stories is that the relationships were very good, strong relationships prior to the breakup. Link to comment
wishingonastar Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Thank you for posting this thread. I have a story to share. My friend was dumped by his girlfriend of 3+ years. He tried everything to get her back. They were broken up for about a year and a half. One day she called him to talk about a bill or something stupid, and he went over to her house and they ended up back together within a few weeks. They are getting married this fall! Link to comment
mattyp Posted May 23, 2009 Share Posted May 23, 2009 Thank you all so much. My story is long and drawn out, soon when I get the time I´ll post the whole thing, but basically she dumped me about a year ago now and has been dating this douche for like almost ten months. He´s one of those guys that has to have a girlfriend all the time. I know she´s not as happy, her friends have told me. Thank you for those hopeful stories. Talk to you all soon. Link to comment
atelis Posted May 24, 2009 Share Posted May 24, 2009 a lot of people i know broke up for 3 or 6 or 12 months etc and have gone on to get married. No real fights or abuse etc, just didn't know what they wanted. It happens a lot and as long as pride doesnt get in the way, reconciliation is always possible. Link to comment
lucasky Posted May 25, 2009 Share Posted May 25, 2009 One of my very best friends has a got-back-together story. Many years ago, she dated a guy for about six months. She went abroad for an international sporting event, and while there, she realized she just was not feeling the relationship. When she returned home, she dumped the guy. She moved on, and went on to have at least two (though I can't remember if there were more) serious relationships, before going to Austrailia for a year. Needless to say, she did not think of this particular ex very much at all, except maybe in passing. As for the ex, apparently, he was deeply hurt by the break up, and never quite let go of the ideal woman he held her to be. I believe he had three semi-serious or largely serious relationships in his time apart from my friend. All the while, I am told, he still held her quite highly. In any event, my friend came home from Austrailia, started hanging out with the ex more, and after a few months, they wound up together again. They have now been dating two years, and living together for one. They got a puppy just this Wednesday (its a little toy poodle and I just met it today! With regards to NC, my friend told me her and this particular ex did not talk for a while, and when they did it was on an irregular basis, maybe two or three times a year, and most of it was done through e-mails, or the occasional coffee-hangout. So theres a success story, right? As mentioned earlier on this thread though, I think a KEY FACTOR is my friend didn't do anything horrible to the guy aside from breaking up with him. There was no cheating, no grass is greener business, no other man, no detrimental things said. It was a break up where both people involved could move on with life without feeling trust was broken. Link to comment
larryburst Posted July 16, 2009 Share Posted July 16, 2009 Here's another one guys... a friend of mine had a good 1 yr+ relationship. towards the end, her bf didnt know what he wanted (GIGS), wasnt sure if he wanted to move, where his life was going and they broke up. They stayed close for a while, first he chased her then she chased him. He then started getting distant and ten started dating a girl and she asked him not to contact her anymore. She knew his email password and would check it regularly, seeing how proud he was of having this new girl, sending pics of her to his friends etc. 2 months later, she gets a call from him saying how he made a big mistake and that every time he was with this other girl he thought of her. They are now back together. The situation is extremely similar to mine but who knows what will happen in my case. Link to comment
cmo Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 i have to ask what doe GIGS stand for? Link to comment
uncomfynumb Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 GIGS=Grass is Greener Syndrome If people only posted in this forum their actional reconciliations instead of all their hopes and wishes for one, there might be 10 pages, might... Link to comment
hater13 Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 Are you by any chance in med school since all your stories about doctors Link to comment
jenna-is-here Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 I have some stories - After this past breakup, I would have gotten together with my ex before this one if he wasnt already married. I was the GIGS person. Now I see how sweet and how much he loved me. I really messed that one up. Another is my friend wanted to get married after dating her bf for a year. He said he didnt believe in marriage. He dated others, she went NC immediately. 7 months later out of the blue, he called her for a date. They are now married, 2 kids. Link to comment
jenna-is-here Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 I am trying to figure out in all these stories if it is the "dumped" or "dumpee" that is coming back to reunite the relationship? Is there a pattern or is it just a mix of both? Link to comment
FootofGod Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 I have some stories - After this past breakup, I would have gotten together with my ex before this one if he wasnt already married. I was the GIGS person. Now I see how sweet and how much he loved me. I really messed that one up. Another is my friend wanted to get married after dating her bf for a year. He said he didnt believe in marriage. He dated others, she went NC immediately. 7 months later out of the blue, he called her for a date. They are now married, 2 kids. It's nice to be reminded that women actually have emotions after they leave someone Nah, jk ladies, I love ya! You're all crazy but I wouldn't have it any other way! Link to comment
jenna-is-here Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 It's nice to be reminded that women actually have emotions after they leave someone Ha! Men - TRUST ME...if you treated the ladies of your past right, they will NEVER FORGET IT. You have no idea. If I am in a relationship and going through a bad time, I think back to the guys that have treated me right. It is like a standard has been set. I think I am going to start a thread about this! Other ladies can chime in... Link to comment
jenna-is-here Posted June 1, 2010 Share Posted June 1, 2010 how do you get the quote thing to show up like that (in italics)? Mine never comes out right Link to comment
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