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I need somebody to talk to


Joey.
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I feel there is nowhere else to go. As I am 13 ANYBODY that I tell I am thinking of suicide would displace me, or try to fool me by saying that everything will be alright. I don't understand this. What I really don't understand is why I want to go though. I am literally bored enough to not want to live anymore. It seems like I fit nowhere in life and I just can't cope with the fact that I live in a * * * * ty world, and may have to deal with it. I just need somebody to help me because I feel this is the last place I can go. The only place where I know I won't be proclaimed an idiot for doing what feels right for me.

 

Thanks.. I hope.

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As I said. I'm simply bored and way out of place with anything in life. I realize how * * * * ty of a world this really is and I'm tired of it. I know that making a change would be impossible and that leaving it to its self would be much easier.

 

And the harder way to go just isn't for me.

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The world is a * * * * ty place because of the people who make it a * * * * ty place. War, greedy bastards, and people who just don't give a rat's ass about how anybody feels. It's sort of a complicated ordeal of my parents divorcing... my dad and I getting left with nothing, moving literally the length of the united states away. Just so much stuff that didn't need to happen. And why? Because of the greedy bastards, and the people who don't give a rat's ass about how anybody feels. I don't find this the best way to live.

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And this isn't about me going to attempt suicide... I try to the best of my ability and plan on not falling into the fate. I just find the pain of thinking like that slowly killing me. I want a reason to enjoy life.

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I'm really sorry to hear about your parents and your current financial situation. Your dad shouldn't be left with nothing though, has he contacted a lawyer?

 

At least you have a father that loves you and takes care of you. I had an abusive father that beat me and constantly called me names. My mother would never step in to stop him, as she was too scared of him.

 

Obviously the world isn't perfect but if you look hard enough you can always find some beauty. When I was growing up I felt like an insignifanct drop of water that was lost in an uncaring sea. You just need to find a niche that you fit into. I found solice in writing and started to concentrate on my studies. I figured if I studied hard enough maybe I could help improve the world through my eduaction. Make it a better place, take some action.

 

While you may not find it the best way to live, it's the only way to live. While you may find your life boring I'm sure its much more interesting than eternal darkness.

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Thank you alot. As I said I just wanted somebody to talk to. And doing it with the people who can be friendly even over the internet is nice. I don't like feeling lonely and would kill to have the life some others do. But I get what you are saying.

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Christ. You sound exactly like me at thirteen.

 

I had the exact same jealousy of other's lives. I saw the "popular kids" and wished everyday that I had their life. In my darkest moment I actually harassed one of them over MSN trying to make him appreciate his luck.

 

I couldn't understand why the hell he was so popular. He was a jerk, dumb and just not a great person. I couldn't understand why it wasn't me.

 

Anyways long story short I'm happy I stuck with my life. He's now unemployed (got fired from the local grocery store) and I'm attending an excellent university registered in one of it's more prestigous programs. People start to pay attention to intelligence and other more important attributes when you get older.

 

I'm sure life's only going to go up for you, as you come off as a very intelligent thirteen year old.

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For me it is extremely difficult to let things go. I have literally broke out in tears in the middle of class because I knew how bad I have screwed up my grades and life ever since we moved from florida to a * * * * ty little town in Washington. I also feel as though I'm letting my dad down. I always tell him that I will get my grades back up. But I can't stop thinking about all of this. I never accomplish anything anymore except for successfully feeling like an ass/attention * * * * * for posting about my problems. I need a way to forget about the past =/.

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Dont worry about crying in class,It's not like you're the first one ever to do it. I started crying because someone chose to give their slice of pizza to someone else rather than me in Grade 8 (I had a lot of stuff going on at home). It's embarassing but nothing to be ashamed of.

 

While your grades may have slipped it's no reason to beat up on yourself. Just try to finish hard on finals and look forward to next year. Universities don't care what grades you got when you were 13 so don't worry about how it affects your future. Just do your best.

 

I have trouble forgetting things as well. No matter how hard you try to forget your past, you won't be able to. I've found it useful to use my previous negative experiences as fuel to make me work harder towards my various goals.

 

You should try and join some clubs/sport teams to get an outlet for your stress (always helped me) and you might even gain a couple of good friends to talk to.

 

You're not an attention * * * * * for posting your problems, by typing them out you're able to see them more clearly. Everyone has them, better to air them out then to let them accumulate in the back of your head.

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Hi, are you sure you have no-one to talk to? My daughter is 13 and she has been suffering somewhat since me and her dad broke up two years ago. I worry about the effect it might have on her and if she came to me and told me she was thinking as you do I would not displace her I would want to help her.

 

What about the school? Is there a teacher that you could talk to? My daughter too has broken down in class crying and is being very disruptive in certain classes but the school is being very supportive and have offered counselling for her.

 

I am sorry that you are going through this at such a young age and feel that the world is a * * * * ty place. Its not that bad out there really it isn't. Yes there are a lot of bad things that go on but there are a lot of good things too. You are only 13 you haven't screwed up your life yet. You still have the chance to get yourself on the right path.

 

Thirteen is such a young age to feel that you are carrying the world on your shoulders, you need to talk to someone who can help lighten the burden and don't worry about posting on here, you are not seeking attention, you are seeking help and that is what it is here for.

 

How is your dad coping since your parent split? Do you think you dad could do with some support too?

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Well I'd like to make my grades better, but knowing the fact that my grades were so utterly terrible this year (4/5 grades F) that I could get perfect grades this quarter and still fail. That has always been one of my fears. I don't care on my grades but considering how much i hate school (mostly the people/schedule) I would never want to go another year. I wish I just had a second chance.

 

Meh... all these wishes are bound to never come true. I know wishes most of the time will never come true, so I guess I will just have to try and make the closest thing possible happen.

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Well I'd like to make my grades better, but knowing the fact that my grades were so utterly terrible this year (4/5 grades F) that I could get perfect grades this quarter and still fail. That has always been one of my fears. I don't care on my grades but considering how much i hate school (mostly the people/schedule) I would never want to go another year. I wish I just had a second chance.

 

Meh... all these wishes are bound to never come true. I know wishes most of the time will never come true, so I guess I will just have to try and make the closest thing possible happen.

 

You should talk to a counsellor and tell her that you had trouble this year due to family troubles. If you do well this quarter they might overlook your bad first quarter marks.

 

I've done it, worked for me.

 

Wishes don't come true if you just sit and wish, but they do if you take action. I suppose it isn't a wish then though, more of a desire haha.

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My school district is terrible. The teachers don't even care. (trust me) and I'm just scared to tell my dad in the fact that I would make him feel like it was his fault. I know that my dad loves me more than anything in the world which is why I wouldn't want to break his heart.

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"In a big town you trust nobody unless you have a reason to trust them" "in a small town you trust until you have a reason else." I'm sort of in the middle. I trust myself and people that I know couldn't mean anything to me when criticizing me.

In basic no.

 

 

Heading off now.

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Hey, if it makes you feel better I'm a 4.0 student currently and I had poor grades throughout high school. I was also stuck in a rut of depression between the ages of thirteen to sixteen. If life does not get better sometime during junior high, it will most likely get better during the latter part of high school. If you really want for your dad to stop pressuring you about your grades all you have to do is prioritise. It's not the most exciting thing being almost completely devoid of a social life, but dedication to education really does pay off. Don't get down about your current situation and your past; people that undergo hard times, have many failures and learn from them, believe in themselves and possess the drive to turn things around have a significant chance to be successful.

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When I was going through it I felt like a complete idiot for going to the counsellor. She would ask the most useless questions and try to complement me on the dumbest things.

 

 

I'm just guessing that's how he feels.

 

Well I have to agree because my daughter has refused to see one ... but Joey sounds more grown up than my daughter!!! He is already reaching out in a way that my daughter wont ... well not yet anyway.

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