Inside A Dumpee's Mind. (Long but please help!)

[vertigoxo]

Okay, so I'm the dumper in my situation. Quick background: 1.5 years relationship, I ended it for many reasons, mainly I wanted a new and better relationship with each other in the future. I told my friend to tell him I want my stuff back from his house, and he got really mad, yelling, "So it comes down to that!" but then my friend told him I wanted us to be friends. He agrees... but said he needed time. So then all this drama happens in the span of two weeks, and I kept blowing up at him for some reasons I sorta forgot now (Haha yeah, I'm dumb.) and then he got very mad and "gave up" on me. And us, pretty much. So he rebounded with this horrible girl. Treated me like crap and like he never knew me. I was devastated... Until karma sets in and the girl he dated basically told him, "By the way, I'm gay; It's over!" and went back to her ex girlfriend. We were in NC for a month and almost 3 weeks by far, broken up for 2 whole months.

 

So after they broke up, my ex started following me at school. I was doing great moving on with my life, until I kept seeing him in this certain hallway at school I go to. I thought I would be fine seeing him... turns out I was wrong. The memories came back, and I cried the entire weekend. So on Tuesday night of this week, I was talking to my best friend on AIM. I brought up about him, telling her I wasn't blaming her, but I couldn't bear to see him upstairs while she was with him. She basically told me if I don't want to see him, I'll have to talk to him. What? I was confused- I thought he wouldn't want to hear from me again! But she suggested to clear the air between us, too much mutual friends that we share are caught in between and it was getting tiring. (Here's the interesting part- she told me that he wouldn't "bite me" if I said something. I found out right there and then she was talking to him on AIM at the same time, probably telling him I'm about to talk to him.) I agreed, and I hesistantly texted my ex. He responded back in a friendly manner. We had a friendly conversation. I apologized for what his latest ex did to him, and he buttered me up saying I was "right about her", which was weird because I never told him what I thought about her, just said I was "sorry it happened". But anyways, other than that, the convo was nice. Short and simple, and I ended it, and we said our good nights. I was good for about two days, and now today I'm just scared I'm going to be set back even farther in my own healing proccess...

 

After our text convo last night, the next day I was walking with my friend and he was behind us, something he hasn't done before in a long time after the break up. (He followed me close before after a certain class). And then I don't see him today. I felt okay about it though.

 

He was my first ever boyfriend. I was his first "long-term" girlfriend, his "first love", so to speak. He was my first "time". But I'm scared to death of what's inside of his mind. Revenge? Reconilation? Or just a platonic friendship? Some kids in my class teased me when they heard about our latest conversation, and all of them chanted that he "wanted me back since there's no other reason to not ignore me". Even the guys agreed with the girls.

 

I don't know what I want out of my ex, really. We shared so much. I guess all I want is the dumpees' point of view about this. Thank you.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I can't blame him for moving on and finding someone else..you dumped him and then treated him badly when he said he needed time to heal. If you want to get back together with him then you should ask him and talk about why you broke up with him in the first place. Forget about wondering what his motives are...talk to him and see if you can work this out.

[HeartGoesOn]

I think that you need to re-read your thread from a few weeks ago on "How to win your ex back."

 

Not to sound harsh, but why don't you follow that advice that you posted?

[vertigoxo]

I can't blame him for moving on and finding someone else..you dumped him and then treated him badly when he said he needed time to heal. If you want to get back together with him then you should ask him and talk about why you broke up with him in the first place. Forget about wondering what his motives are...talk to him and see if you can work this out.

 

I understand from his POV. I'm just really scared about what I should say to him. Right now I'm trying to be cool about it all and stuff... I'll talk to him once he contacts me in his own pace. I don't want to pressure him.

 

I think that you need to re-read your thread from a few weeks ago on "How to win your ex back."

 

Not to sound harsh, but why don't you follow that advice that you posted?

 

Hahaha, it's you again. I think you need to re-read my thread and I've been following all the steps by far there.

[vertigoxo]

So I cried today. I guess I can't handle the new contact with my ex. I don't know what else to do.